they always eat in the kitchen. strange to say, there was no dining-room in the house, though there was a sweetly old-fashioned drawing-room. the servant was with the sufferer, but alexa was too much in the sick-room, notwithstanding, to know that she was eating her porridge and milk. the laird partook but sparingly, on the ground that the fare tended to fatness, which affliction of age he congratulated himself on having hitherto escaped. they eat in silence, but not a glance of her father that might indicate a want escaped the daughter. when the meal was ended, and the old man had given thanks, alexa put on the table a big black bible, which her father took with solemn face and reverent gesture. in the course of his nightly reading of the new testament, he had come to the twelfth chapter of st. luke, with the lord's parable of the rich man whose soul they required of him: he read it beautifully, with an expression that seemed to indicate a sense of the lord's meaning what he said.
“we will omit the psalm this evening—for the sake of the sufferer,” he said, having ended the chapter. “the lord will have mercy and not sacrifice.”
they rose from their chairs and knelt on the stone floor. the old man prayed with much tone and expression, and i think meant all he said, though none of it seemed to spring from fresh need or new thankfulness, for he used only the old stock phrases, which flowed freely from his lips. he dwelt much on the merits of the saviour; he humbled himself as the chief of sinners, whom it must be a satisfaction to god to cut off, but a greater satisfaction to spare for the sake of one whom he loved. plainly the man counted it a most important thing to stand well with him who had created him. when they rose, alexa looked formally solemn, but the wan face of her father shone: the psyche, if not the ego, had prayed—and felt comfortable. he sat down, and looked fixedly, as if into eternity, but perhaps it was into vacancy; they are much the same to most people.
“come into the study for a moment, lexy, if you please,” he said, rising at length. his politeness to his daughter, and indeed to all that came near him, was one of the most notable points in his behavior.
alexa followed the black, slender, erect little figure up the stair, which consisted of about a dozen steps, filling the entrance from wall to wall, a width of some twelve feet. between it and the outer door there was but room for the door of the kitchen on the one hand, and that of a small closet on the other. at the top was a wide space, a sort of irregular hall, more like an out-of-door court, paved with large flat stones into which projected the other side of the rounded mass, bordered by the grassy inclosure.
the laird turned to the right, and through a door into a room which had but one small window hidden by bookcases. naturally it smelled musty, of old books and decayed bindings, an odor not unpleasant to some nostrils. he closed the door behind him, placed a chair for his daughter, and set himself in another by a deal table, upon which were books and papers.
“this is a sore trial, alexa!” he said with a sigh.
“it is indeed, father—for the poor young man!” she returned.
“true; but it would be selfish indeed to regard the greatness of his suffering as rendering our trial the less. it is to us a more serious matter than you seem to think. it will cost much more than, in the present state of my finances, i can afford to pay. you little think—”
“but, father,” interrupted alexa, “how could we help it?”
“he might have been carried elsewhere!”
“with me standing there! surely not, father! even andrew ingram offered to receive him.”
“why did he not take him then?”
“the doctor wouldn't hear of it. and i wouldn't hear of it either.”
“it was ill-considered, lexy. but what's done is done—though, alas! not paid for.”
“we must take the luck as it comes, father!”
“alexa,” rejoined the laird with solemnity, “you ought never to mention luck. there is no such thing. it was either for the young man's sins, or to prevent worse, or for necessary discipline, that the train was overturned. the cause is known to him. all are in his hands—and we must beware of attempting to take any out of his hands, for it can not be done.”
“then, father, if there be no chance, our part was ordered too. so there is the young man in our spare room, and we must receive our share of the trouble as from the hand of the lord.”
“certainly, my dear! it was the expense i was thinking of. i was only lamenting—bear me witness, i was not opposing—the will of the lord. a man's natural feelings remain.”
“if the thing is not to be helped, let us think no more about it!”
“it is the expense, my dear! will you not let your mind rest for a moment upon the fact? i am doing my utmost to impress it upon you. for other expenses there is always something to show; for this there will be nothing, positively nothing!”
“not the mended leg, father?”
“the money will vanish, i tell you, as a tale that is told.”
“it is our life that vanishes that way!”
“the simile suits either. so long as we do not use the words of scripture irreverently, there is no harm in making a different application of them. there is no irreverence here: next to the grace of god, money is the thing hardest to get and hardest to keep. if we are not wise with it, the grace—i mean money—will not go far.”
“not so far as the next world, anyhow!” said alexa, as if to herself.
“how dare you, child! the redeemer tells us to make friends of the mammon of unrighteousness, that when we die it may receive us into everlasting habitations!”
“i read the passage this morning, father: it is they, not it, will receive you. and i have heard that it ought to be translated, 'make friends with, or by means of the mammon of unrighteousness.”
“i will reconsider the passage. we must not lightly change even the translated word!”
the laird had never thought that it might be of consequence to him one day to have friends in the other world. neither had he reflected that the lord did not regard the obligation of gratitude as ceasing with this life.
alexa had reason to fear that her father made a friend of, and never a friend with the mammon of unrighteousness. at the same time the half-penny he put in the plate every sunday must go a long way if it was not estimated, like that of the poor widow, according to the amount he possessed, but according to the difficulty he found in parting with it.
“after weeks, perhaps months of nursing and food and doctor's stuff,” resumed the laird, “he will walk away, and we shall see not a plack of the money he carries with him. the visible will become the invisible, the present the absent!”
“the little it will cost you, father—”
“hold there, my child! if you call any cost little, i will not hear a word more: we should be but running a race from different points to different goals! it will cost—that is enough! how much it will cost me, you can not calculate, for you do not know what money stands for in my eyes. there are things before which money is insignificant!”
“those dreary old books!” said alexa to herself, casting a glance on the shelves that filled the room from floor to ceiling, and from wall to wall.
“what i was going to say, father,” she returned, “was, that i have a little money of my own, and this affair shall cost you nothing. leave me to contrive. would you tell him his friends must pay his board, or take him away? it would be a nice anecdote in the annals of the fordyces of potlurg!”
“at the same time, what more natural?” rejoined her father. “his friends must in any case be applied to! i learn from his pocket-book—”
“father!”
“content yourself, alexa. i have a right to know whom i receive under my roof. besides, have i not learned thereby that the youth is a sort of connection!”
“you don't mean it, father?”
“i do mean it. his mother and yours were first cousins.”
“that is not a connection; it's a close kinship!”
“is it?” said the laird, dryly.
“anyhow,” pursued alexa, “i give you my word you shall hear nothing more of the expense.”
she bade her father good-night, and returning to the bedside of her patient, released meg.