at two periods of the day marthe, with great effort and for professional purposes, achieved some degree of personal tidiness. the first period began at about four o'clock in the afternoon. by six o'clock or six-thirty she had slipped back into the sloven. the second period began at about ten o'clock at night. it was more brilliant while it lasted, but owing to the accentuation of marthe's characteristics by fatigue it seldom lasted more than an hour. when marthe opened the door to g.j. she was at her proudest, intensely conscious of being clean and neat, and unwilling to stand any nonsense from anybody. of course she was polite to g.j. as the chief friend of the establishment and a giver of good tips, but she deprecated calls by gentlemen in the evening, for unless they were made by appointment the risk of complications at once arose.
the mention of an air-raid rendered her definitely inimical. formerly marthe had been more than average nervous in air-raids, but she had grown used to them and now defied them. as she kept all windows closed on principle she heard less of raids than some people. g.j. did not explain the circumstances. he simply asked if madame had returned. no, madame had not returned. true, marthe had not been unaware of guns and things, but there was no need to worry; madame must have arrived at the theatre long before the guns started. marthe really could not be bothered with these unnecessary apprehensions. she had her duties to attend to like other folks, and they were heavy, and she washed her hands of air-raids; she accepted no responsibility for them; for her, within the flat, they did not exist, and the whole german war-machine was thereby foiled. g.j. was on the point of a full explanation, but he checked himself. a recital of the circumstances would not immediately help, and it might hinder. concealing his astonishment at the excesses of which unimaginative stolidity is capable, even in an italian, he turned down the stairs again.
he stopped in the middle of the stairs, because he did not know what he was going to do, and he seemed to lack force for decisions. no harm could have happened to christine; she had run off, that was certain. and yet—had he not often heard of the impish tricks of explosions? of one person being taken and another left? was it not possible that christine had been blown to the other end of the street, and was now lying there?... no! either she was on her way home, or, automatically, she had scurried to the theatre, which was close to st. martin's street, and been too fearful to venture forth again. perhaps she was looking somewhere for him. yet she might be dead. in any case, what could he do? ring up the police? it was too soon. he decided that he would wait in cork street for half an hour. this plan appealed to him for the mere reason that it was negative.
as he opened the front door he saw a taxi standing outside. the taxi-man had taken one of the lamps from its bracket, and was looking into the interior of the cab, which was ornate with toy-curtains and artificial flowers to indicate to the world that he was an owner-driver and understood life. hearing the noise of the door, he turned his head—he was wearing a bowler hat and a smart white muffler—and said to g.j., with self-respecting respect for a gentleman:
"this is no. 170, isn't it, sir?"
"yes."
the taxi-man jerked his head to draw g.j.'s attention to the interior of the vehicle. christine was half on the seat and half on the floor, unconscious, with shut eyes.
instantly g.j. was conscious of making a complete recovery from all the effects, physical and moral, of the air-raid.
"just help me to get her out, will you?" he said in a casual tone, "and i'll carry her upstairs. where did you pick the lady up?"
"strand, sir, nearly opposite romano's."
"the dickens you did!"
"shock from air-raid, i suppose, sir."
"probably."
"she did seem a little upset when she hailed me, or i shouldn't have taken her. i was off home, and i only took her to oblige."
the taxi-man ran quickly round to the other side of the cab and entered it by the off-door, behind christine. together the men lifted her up.
"i can manage her," said g.j. calmly.
"excuse me, sir, you'll have to get hold lower down, so as her waist'll be nearly as high as your shoulder. my brother's a fireman."
"right," said g.j. "by the way, what's the fare?"
holding christine across his shoulder with the right arm, he unbuttoned his overcoat with his left hand and took out change from his trouser pocket for the driver.
"you might pull the door to after me," he said, in response to the driver's expression of thanks.
"certainly, sir."
the door banged. he was alone with christine on the long, dark, inclement stairs. he felt the contours of her body through her clothes. she was limp, helpless. she was a featherweight. she was nothing at all; inexpressibly girlish, pathetic, dear. never had g.j. felt as he felt then. he mounted the stairs rather quickly, with firm, disdaining steps, and, despite his being a little out of breath, he had a tremendous triumph over the stolidity of marthe when she answered his ring. marthe screamed, and in the scream readjusted her views concerning air-raids.
"it's queer this swoon lasting such a long time!" he reflected, when christine had been deposited on the sofa in the sitting-room, and the common remedies and tricks tried without result, and marthe had gone into the kitchen to make hot water hotter.
he had established absolute empire over marthe. he had insisted on marthe not being silly; and yet, though he had already been silly himself in his absurd speculations as to the possibility of christine's death, he was now in danger of being silly again. did ordinary swoons ever continue as this one was continuing? would christine ever come out of it? he stood with his back to the fireplace, and her head and shoulders were right under him, so that he looked almost perpendicularly down upon them. her face was as pale as ivory; every drop of blood seemed to have left it; the same with her neck and bosom; her limbs had dropped anyhow, in disarray; a fur jacket was untidily cast over her black muslin dress. but her waved hair, fresh from the weekly visit of the professional coiffeur, remained in the most perfect order.
g.j. looked round the room. it was getting very shabby. its pale enamelled shabbiness and the tawdry ugliness of nearly every object in it had never repelled and saddened him as they did then. the sole agreeable item was a large photograph of the mistress in a rich silver frame which he had given her. she would not let him buy knicknacks or draperies for her drawing-room; she preferred other presents. and now that she lay in the room, but with no power to animate it, he knew what the room really looked like; it looked like a dentist's waiting-room, except that no dentist would expose copies of la vie parisienne to the view of clients. it had no more individuality than a dentist's waiting-room. indeed it was a dentist's waiting-room. he remembered that he had had similar ideas about the room at the beginning of his acquaintance with christine; but he had partially forgotten them, and moreover, they had not by any means been so clear and desolating as in that moment.
he looked from the photograph to her face. the face was like the photograph, but in the swoon its wistfulness became unbearable. and it was so young. what was she? twenty-seven? she could not be twenty-eight. no age! a girl! and talk about experience! she had had scarcely any experience, save one kind of experience. the monotony and narrowness of her life was terrifying to him. he had fifty interests, but she had only one. all her days were alike. she had no change and no holiday; no past and no future; no family; no intimate friends—unless marthe was an intimate friend; no horizons, no prospects. she witnessed life in london through the distorting, mystifying veil of a foreign language imperfectly understood. she was the most solitary girl in london, or she would have been were there not a hundred thousand or so others in nearly the same case.... stay! once she had delicately allowed him to divine that she had been to bournemouth with a gentleman for a week-end. he could recall nothing else. nightly, or almost nightly, she listened to the same insufferably tedious jokes in the same insufferably tedious revue. but the authorities were soon going to deprive her of the opportunity of doing that. and then she would cease to receive even the education that revues can furnish, and in her mind no images would survive but images connected with the material arts of love. for, after all, what had they truly in common, he and she, but a periodical transient excitation?
when next he looked at her, her eyes were wide open and a flush was coming, as imperceptibly as the dawn, into her cheeks. he took her hands again and rubbed them. marthe returned, and christine drank. she gazed, in weak silence, first at marthe and then at g.j. after a few moments no one spoke. marthe took off christine's boots, and rubbed her stockinged feet, and then kissed them violently.
"madame should go to bed."
"i am better."
marthe left the room, seeming resentful.
"what has passed?" christine murmured, without smiling.
"a faint in the taxi, my poor child. that was all," said g.j. calmly.
"but how is it that i find myself here?"
"i carried thee upstairs in my arms."
"thou?"
"why not?" he spoke lightly, with careful negligence. "it appears that thou wast in the strand."
"was i? i lost thee. something tore thee from me. i ran. i ran till i could not run. i was sure that never more should i see thee alive. oh! my gilbert, what terrible moments! what a catastrophe! never shall i forget those moments!"
g.j. said, with bland supremacy:
"but it is necessary that thou shouldst forget them. master thyself. thou knowst now what it is—an air-raid. it was an ordinary air-raid. there have been many like it. there will be many more. for once we were in the middle of a raid—by chance. but we are safe—that is enough."
"but the deaths?"
he shook his head.
"but there must have been many deaths!"
"i do not know. there will have been deaths. there usually are." he shrugged his shoulders.
christine sat up and gave a little screech.
"ah!" she burst out, her features suddenly transformed by enraged protest. "why wilt thou act thy cold man?"
he was amazed at the sudden nervous strength she showed.
"but, my little one—"
she cried:
"why wilt thou act thy cold man? i shall become mad in this sacred england. i shall become totally mad. you are all the same, all, all, men and women. you are marvels—let it be so!—but you are not human. do you then wish to be taken for telegraph-poles? always you are pretending something. pretending that you have no sentiments. and you are soaked in sentimentality. but no! you will not show it! you will not applaud your soldiers in the streets. you will not salute your flag. you will not salute even a corpse. you have only one phrase: 'it is nothing'. if you win a battle, 'it is nothing' if you lose one, 'it is nothing'. if you are nearly killed in an air-raid, 'it is nothing'. and if you were killed outright and could yet speak, you would say, with your eternal sneer, 'it is nothing'. you other men, you make love with the air of [230] turning on a tap. as for your women, god knows—! but i have a horror of englishwomen. prudes but wantons. can i not guess? always hypocrites. always holding themselves in. my god, that pinched smile! and your women of the world especially. have they a natural gesture? yet does not everyone know that they are rotten with vice and perversity? and your actresses!... and they talk of us! ah, well! for me, i can say that i earn my living honestly, every son of it. for all that i receive, i give. and they would throw me on to the pavement to starve, me whose function in society—"
she collapsed in sobs, and with averted face held out her arms in appeal. g.j., at once admiring and stricken with compassion, bent and clasped her neck, and kissed her, and kept his mouth on hers. her tears dropped freely on his cheeks. her sobs shook both of them. gradually the sobs decreased in violence and frequency. in an infant's broken voice she murmured into his mouth:
"my wolf! is it true—that thou didst carry me here in thy arms? i am so proud."
he was not in the slightest degree irritated or grieved by her tirade. but the childlike changeableness and facility of her emotions touched him. he savoured her youth, and himself felt curiously young. it was the fact that within the last year he had grown younger.
he thought of great intellectuals, artists, men of action, princes, kings—historical figures—in whom courtesans had inspired immortal passion. he thought of the illustrious courtesans who had made themselves heroic in legend, women whose loves were countless and often venal, and yet whose renown had come down to posterity as gloriously as that of supreme poets. he thought of lifelong passionate attachments, which to the world were inexplicable, and which the world never tired of leniently discussing. he overheard people saying: "yes. picked her up somewhere, in a promenade. she worships him, and he adores her. don't know where he hides her. you see them about together sometimes—at concerts, for instance. mysterious-looking creature she is. plays the part very well, too. strange affair. but, of course, there's no accounting for these things."
the role attracted him. and there could be no doubt that she did worship him utterly. he did not analyse his feeling for her—perhaps could not. she satisfied something in him that was profound. she never offended his sensibilities, nor wearied him. her manners were excellent, her gestures full of grace and modesty, her temperament extreme. a unique combination! and if the tie between them was not real and secure, why should he have yearned for her company that night after the scenes with concepcion and queen. those women challenged him, discomposed him, fretted him, fought him, left his nerves raw. she soothed. why should he not, in the french phrase, "put her among her own furniture?" in a proper artistic environment, an environment created by himself, of taste and moderate luxury, she would be exquisite. she would blossom. and she would blossom for him alone. she would live for his footstep on her threshold; and when he was not there she would dream amid cushions like a cat. in the right environment she would become another being, that was to say, the same being, but orchidised. and when he was old, when he was sixty-five, she would still be young, still be under forty and seductive. and the publishing of his last will and testament, under which she inherited all, would render her famous throughout all the west end, and the word "romance" would spring to every lip. he searched in his mind for the location of suitable flats.
"is it true that thou didst carry me in thine arms?" repeated christine.
he murmured into her mouth:
"is it true? can she doubt? the proof, then."
and he picked her up as though she had been a doll, and carried her into the bedroom. as she lay on the bed, she raised her arm and looked at the broken wrist-watch and sighed.
"my mascot. it is not a blague, my mascot."
shortly afterwards she began to cry again, at first gently; then sobs supervened.
"she must sleep," he said firmly.
she shook her head.
"i cannot. i have been too upset. it is impossible that i should sleep."
"she must."
"go and buy me a drug."
"if i go and buy her a drug, will she undress and get into bed while i am away?"
she nodded.
calling marthe, and taking the latch-key of the street-door, he went to his chemist's in dover street and bought some potassium bromide and sal volatile. when he came back marthe whispered to him:
"she sleeps. she has told me everything as i undressed her. the poor child!"
