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CHAPTER XXV. PROCEEDINGS AT RANGOON.

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freed from the annoyance of the captain's presence, we were by no means an unhappy crowd. lying in such a crowded anchorage there was plenty of sight-seeing, and the coming and going of vessels was incessant, owing to the demand for rice to feed the famishing millions on the other side of the bay of bengal. besides that, we youngsters often got a run ashore when the mate or second mate wanted to go up town, which was pretty frequent, as there was no restraint upon them. to while away the time of waiting on the pier for them we used to have great fun with the boatmen, who squatted there sucking their eternal hubble-bubbles and chattering continually. many a queer yarn, in queerer gibberish, did i hear from those good-natured fellows, only understanding about one word in ten that they said, and averaging the rest; so that i have no doubt that a comparison between my idea of a story and the story itself must have been exceedingly funny. but one day, when surrounded by a knot of hindus, i suddenly remembered that when i was quite a child i had read in chambers' miscellany a number of stories of hindu mythology, all of which were as fresh in my memory as the alphabet. accordingly i commenced to repeat the "avatar of the fish" in such broken english, and occasional native words, as i thought would best convey my meaning. the effect was wonderful. usually undemonstrative, they seemed fairly startled out of all their reserve, and over the ring of eager black faces wave after wave of conflicting expressions chased one another, while broken ejaculations burst irrepressibly from their parted lips. as the well-known names of rama, vishnu, siva, ganesh and co. rolled trippingly off my tongue, their delight knew no bounds; and when at last i halted for lack of breath, they were ready to give me anything they possessed. thenceforward i was a prime favourite among them. well for me that it was so, for very shortly afterwards an event happened that nearly brought my career to a premature close. i had been shaking hands with them all round, and boy-like, had been showing off my strength by squeezing their delicate hands in mine, extorting from them all sorts of queer grimaces and expressions of wonder at my strength of wrist. presently a mussulman joined the group. he had just come up from the water, where he had been bathing, after having his poll shaven. clad only in a waist-cloth, his torso was fully revealed, its splendid proportions showing a development that many a pugilist would have envied. our proceedings did not appear to please him, for he wore a most diabolical scowl, which, as he was anything but handsome, gave me a serious disrelish for his company. but suddenly, as if by an uncontrollable impulse, he thrust out his hand to me, making signs for me to try my strength on him. i would have refused, but pride forbade; so i placed my hand in his and waited for his grip, determined to show no sign even if the blood should spurt from my finger-tips. we stood facing one another thus for almost a minute, when, without warning, he lifted my arm high, and at the same time thrust me backwards towards the edge of the wharf, which was thirty feet above the mud (the tide being out) and totally unprotected. another second and i should have been over, when the whole crowd of boatmen rushed at him, and, dragging him off me, forced him to retreat up the wharf shorewards. mad with rage i seized a log of wood and rushed after him; but the remainder of my friends surrounded me, and implored me not to pursue him, as i should certainly be killed. and, indeed, as soon as i cooled down somewhat, the justice of their contention was evident, for in those tortuous alleys one might be attacked from a dozen differing directions at once, and never see the aggressor. therefore i felt glad that i had not been allowed to have the way my mad folly would have led me, and thankfully meditated upon my undoubtedly narrow escape. the affair made a deep impression upon me, for it was the only time in all my experience that i was ever attacked abroad.

the loading of our vessel proceeded very slowly, which was not to be wondered at, since all the energies of the shipping people seemed to be absorbed by the demands of the big steamships that were incessantly carrying rice to calcutta because of the famine. but, slow as it was, it gradually approached completion, and the important question began to occupy all our minds: were we going to get any liberty or money? since the night of the skipper's surprise-visit, we had only seen him once, and that was when he returned on shore the next morning. the officers were warily approached upon the subject, but they knew no more than we did of the skipper's movements or intentions. at last, after a prolonged council of war, it was decided to send him a letter, signed by one of the a.b.'s on behalf of the rest. but then the difficulty arose: who was to write the important document? not one of the men was capable of doing so—in fact, i was the letter-writer in ordinary for all hands. so i was approached as to my willingness to do what was required. i readily consented, only stipulating that i should be held blameless in the event of trouble ensuing. "oh, of course," said they all, "we wouldn't let you take the blame." well, i wrote the letter, and, although i was no hand at composition, i remember that it was exceedingly terse and to the point. with a good deal of pride i read it to the assembled conclave, and all agreed that it was a model of what such a letter ought to be. but when it came to signing the document, i was disgusted to find that each man was anxious that some other fellow should have the honour. all professed readiness to take the responsibility, but when it came to putting their names to paper they hung back. at last, to my secret amusement, the old dutchman, hansen, said, "oh, all righd, put my name to id; i tondt care for te oldt man nodt a liddle pidt." it struck me at once that the old fellow had no idea of the vigour of the language used, but that was none of my affair. so "hans hansen" was appended to the letter; it was enclosed in an envelope, and sent per the "dubash" to the "british burmah bar," where the old man was living. in a perfect fever of excitement i awaited the result. it was not long delayed. shortly after dinner the skipper came on board in a perfect fury, and, before he had got his foot over the rail, yelled for hansen. the poor old dutchman paddled aft, shaking like a feather-vane in a gale of wind, and, when he got to where the old man was standing, he looked as if his legs would double up under him. good heavens! how the skipper did rave. seeing who he had to deal with he just spread himself, so to speak, and, much to his satisfaction, succeeded in scaring hansen nearly to death. suddenly my name was called, and, in a moment, i recognized that i had been given away. well, i had to face the music; so i determined to put the best face i could upon the matter, and, in any case, to show no cowardice. i strolled quietly aft, and received the old sinner's broadside with a perfectly unmoved front. he threatened me with prison—almost hanging—for the unparalleled crime i had committed; but i smiled sweetly, and, as soon as i could get in a word, i told him he couldn't do anything to me at all. then he changed his tactics, and tried to wheedle me into saying that the men had compelled me to write, and begged me to tell him whose composition it was. having by this[320] time grown bolder, i told him that i was the author, and that i felt proud of it. this so enraged him that he ran at me foaming and screaming to me to get out of his cabin. but, even then, his prudence did not desert him, for he never ventured to strike me, and both the officers remained strictly neutral. and, after all, the desired end was attained for every one except myself, for the next day liberty was announced, with cash to the extent of twenty rupees each. but from this i was to be excluded. however, after the other fellows had gone, my fellow ordinary seaman and i were told by the mate that we might go too, if we chose, but that he had no money to give us. we had a couple of rupees between us, enough to get ourselves something to eat, so we gladly availed ourselves of his permission and were soon ashore.

from the first hour of our arrival i had looked with longing eyes upon the mighty mass of the golden pagoda, and never ceased hoping that i might be able to see it near at hand; and now i determined to lose no time in realizing my desires. bill wanted to go down town, and hunt up some of our shipmates for the purpose of borrowing a little from them; but i dissuaded him, and, after a bottle of beer each, and the purchase of a fistful of cigars for the equivalent of twopence, we trudged off. there was no mistaking the way, for the road was broad and the pagoda itself was our guide; but i have ever since rejoiced that i did not know how far it was, or i certainly should never have visited it. the fierce sun glared down upon the white dusty road so that it was like walking in an oven; gharries and ekkas rolled tantalizingly by, and our throats became like leather. but we persevered, and after i am afraid to say how long, we came at last to the imposing avenue of colossal black marble monsters leading to the first plateau. immensely broad flights of steps led up to an enormous platform, around which we roamed, bewildered by the wonderful array of uncouth monsters grouped everywhere. then up more steps on to another plateau from whence sprang the central mass, a sort of pyramid without angles, and rising in broad steps of masonry which, flat at first, gradually sloped upward until they were lost in the glittering cone of the towering summit. around the base of this vast structure were small temples like porticoes leading to the interior of the main building; but far as we could see, each of them was self-contained, and no entrance to the central edifice was visible. i made many inquiries whether that great pyramid was solid, or contained chambers of any sort; but the answers i got were so conflicting that i could come to no conclusion at all. the strangest feature of the whole wonderful place was the number of elaborately decorated bells of all sizes which hung about, some of them on the most flimsy erections. they emitted, when struck, tones of the most silvery sweetness, such as i have never heard from bells (except specimens from the same country) before or since. and presently we came upon one in a secluded corner that must be, i should think, one of the largest bells in the world, although i have never seen any mention of it in[322] books or articles where big bells are spoken of. it was hanging under a sort of conical shed, suspended from a gallows built of huge baulks of teak, but its lip was only about eighteen inches off the ground. it was covered with inscriptions—in burmese, i suppose—but had no other enrichment. curious to hear its tone, i struck it with a large deer-horn, of which there were many lying about; but there was no response. harder and harder i struck, until at last bill hove a massive fragment of stone against it with all his force; but still not a sound could be heard—no, not so much as an iron wall would have given back. baffled in sampling its tone, we tried to measure it roughly, and found that with outstretched arms we could reach round it in four times. this would make its circumference about twenty feet. then, lying flat on my back, i tried to measure its thickness of metal; but my arm was not long enough—it was much thicker than i could reach in from outside. its height i should estimate at twelve feet; but that is very rough, since we had no pole. altogether a grandfather of bells. gilding was going on in all directions, the workmen perched upon flimsy bamboo scaffolding in all sorts of precarious positions; and i remember trying to calculate how much gold it must take to keep so great a place brilliant. i did not then know that the gold-leaf was one of the principal offerings made by worshippers, although, when we presently entered one of the temples, and witnessed the worship, the strangeness of the proceedings ought to have enlightened me. yellow-garbed, close-shaven phoongyees were squatting all over the pavement of the building, apparently absorbed in reverent adoration of the row of idols ranged along the inner end of the place. yet, at the same time, more workmen were busily engaged in gilding the idols themselves—one, especially, was plastering the face of the central figure with it, until it shone in that dim hall like a setting sun. i was speechless with wonder at what seemed such a strange mixture of irreverence and worship. while i stood silently gazing at the strange scene, a voice near me said, in most perfect high-bred english, "i suppose you don't believe in this, do you?" i turned sharply; and there at my elbow stood a chinaman, simply dressed in white silk, with purple cap and shoes. a delightful subtle scent exhaled from his robes, and a gentle smile played about his calm, intellectual face. in fact, "gentleman" was writ large upon him; but i could not grasp the idea that it was he who had spoken. as soon as my bewilderment had passed a little, i said, "was it you that spoke just now?" he nodded, and repeated his question. "of course not," i answered; "neither do you, i should imagine?" with the slightest possible shrug of his shoulders, he said, "why not? i do not claim to be wiser than the myriads of my ancestors whose faith it was. what sufficed them may surely content me." "but," i replied eagerly, "you have evidently studied in some english-speaking country, and you must have read our books. did they not alter your opinions as to the wisdom of your ancestors?" "i have taken my b.a. degree at cambridge," said he, "and i am fairly conversant with western literature; but upon religious topics i do not profess any opinions. the subject is far too vast for me to attempt to take up, since it would necessarily mean the exclusion of all others; and i have much to do. consequently i accept unquestioningly that form of religion in which i was born, taking the line of least resistance. but i must bid you good day, hoping you will enjoy your visit." and before i could say another word he was gone. i felt very small and ignorant beside this exquisite oriental, whose gracious manners and beautiful voice have haunted me ever since, and, although i am fully conscious how poor a figure i must have cut beside so gifted and highly educated a man, i have never ceased to regret that i did not have a longer enjoyment of his pleasant company. while i still stood musing over this strange encounter, a heavy hand was laid upon my shoulder, and, turning sharply round, i was confronted by our second mate, whose ill-fitting clothes, gross, animalized face and boisterous behaviour, formed a complete contrast to the dainty gentleman who had just quitted my side. "hullo!" he said with a sneer, "what you doin' ere, hay? goin' ter turn me'ommedun?" i made some jesting reply, looking anxiously meanwhile at his cigar, and then at the silent row of priests, in grave doubt as to how they might take his noisy behaviour in their sacred building. but they were apparently used to it, for they took not the slightest notice. "got 'ny money?" he queried with a grin, knowing pretty well how unlikely it was. upon my telling him how poorly we were off, he kindly gave me two rupees and then went on his way.

as i had by this time had quite enough of sight-seeing, besides being hungry and thirsty, i started to look for my chum; and, after some search, found him sitting in a shady angle of the great flight of steps, intently watching the impassive figure of one of a long row of mendicants that lined the side of the way up to the temple. he was quite happy, and very much interested in the queer offerings that he had seen made to the beggar whom he had been studying. shreds of tobacco, a few grains of rice, and other trifles unfamiliar to us, but of the tiniest possible value, were being dropped into his basket by the native passers-by, in response to the mellow note which resounded from a triangular piece of metal which he held suspended from a stick, and occasionally tapped with a bone. "goin' ter give him anythin', bill?" i asked. "'oo? me? wot djer tek me for? lazy ole swine! i bet 'ees got a —— sight more brass 'n you er me'll ever 'ave. no bloomin' fear!" it may have been fancy, but certainly i thought i saw a gleam in that beggar's filmy eye as if bill's contemptuous words were quite understood by him. "well," i said, "i'm goin' ter give 'im a tanner fer luck." and, as i spoke, i fished out four annas and dropped the little piece of silver into his cup. i turned to go immediately; but he stretched forth a skinny arm, offering me a withered, blood-red flower, and murmuring some (to me) utterly unintelligible words. now, i would not willingly hurt any one's feelings gratuitously; so i smiled cheerfully back, accepted his flower, and saying, "bote accha; salaam, ole stockin'," skipped off down the steps, followed grumblingly by bill. as we went, i told him of the second mate's gift. he immediately suggested taking a gharry back. i was in no wise loth to agree, for the remembrance of our morning's trudge was anything but pleasant. but, when we arrived at the place where the vehicles were grouped, those infernal gharry-wallahs were all so independent that they wouldn't bate a pice of three rupees for the trip. as this was quite out of the question, we took the road again with heavy hearts and aching feet: bill cursing, in choicest bermondsey, niggers in general and gharry-wallahs in particular. for about half a mile we trudged along, when, suddenly turning a slight bend in the road, we sighted a gharry ambling along with one door open. a bright thought seized me, and, whispering to bill my idea, we hurried noiselessly after the slowly-moving carriage. as soon as we got near enough, we saw that the driver was soundly asleep upon his box, the reins dangling loosely from his fingers, and the old horse plodding along at his own sweet will. gently we popped into the crazy old ambulance, quietly closed the door, and lounged back like two plutocrats. i don't think i ever enjoyed a ride more, for, slowly as we went, we arrived at the gharry-stand in phayre street all too soon to suit me. before the gharry stopped we opened the door, and, quietly as we had entered, were stepping out, when that unlucky bill caught his foot in the step, and, catching at the door to save himself, gave the whole concern a heavy lurch. this effectually roused the driver, who jumped down off his box and demanded his fare. bill was furious (at being caught, i suppose), and was proposing to slay and eat the fellow, whose yells speedily brought all his chums round. as i was getting nervous i offered him eight annas, at the same time trying to pacify my burly shipmate, who was carrying on like a madman. fortunately a white policeman came along, before whose dignified approach all the clustering natives stood respectfully back. to him i told the exact facts of the story. without a word he took the eight annas from me, gave it to the hack-man, and uttered the single word "jao." the effect was magical. the crowd melted away, and we were at liberty to resume our journey. the rest of the day passed uneventfully enough. we had a splendid dinner in one of the bazaar dining-rooms at a rupee each, washed it down with a bottle of bass, and, after sundry cigars, strolled leisurely down the pier, and sat there enjoying the coolness of the evening, until, feeling tired of shore, we hailed the ship, and were fetched on board by the two apprentices. a quiet night's rest succeeded; but the morning brought diversions. the ex-policeman came on board quietly enough, as befitted a man accustomed to discipline; but the rest, with the exception of old hansen, who returned early on the previous day, were in a parlous state. two did not return; and, later, news came that they were safely in chowkey, having covered themselves with glory by routing a whole brigade of native police who tried to arrest them, and caused grievous bodily harm to several white constables who had finally carried them off. one of them was the jolly suffolker, who had thus falsified all my previous estimates of his amiability; the other was mick, the long irishman, at whose outburst nobody was surprised. it is hardly necessary, perhaps, to say that no work was done that day, except a little clearing up decks, for which of course we boys were available. but, towards evening, the repentant revellers began to realize the extent of their folly, and to appear, in some measure, ashamed of themselves. just at sunset a police-boat arrived bringing mick, a deplorable object, his clothes hanging from him in festoons, and his flesh caked up with dried filth and blood. he was certainly much the worse for wear, but filled with an unholy delight at the thought of the glorious time he had enjoyed. it appeared, however, that the behaviour of charley the suffolker had been so outrageous, and his refusal to return to his ship so decided, that the authorities—lenient, as they undoubtedly were, to sailors—were compelled to give him a month's hard labour. upon hearing his sentence he lifted up his voice and shouted, "hooray!" to the great annoyance of the magistrate, who had him incontinently man-handled off to the cells.

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