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THE FOURTH CHAPTER THE WIFF-WAFF

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when at last i could look around me i found that the hall was indeed simply full of animals. it seemed to me that almost every kind of creature from the countryside must be there: a pigeon, a white rat, an owl, a badger, a jackdaw—there was even a small pig, just in from the rainy garden, carefully wiping his feet on the mat while the light from the candle glistened on his wet pink back.

the doctor took the candlestick from the duck and turned to me.

“look here,” he said: “you must get those wet clothes off—by the way, what is your name?”

“tommy stubbins,” i said.

“oh, are you the son of jacob stubbins, the shoemaker?”

“yes,” i said.

“excellent bootmaker, your father,” said the doctor. “you see these?” and he held up his right foot to show me the enormous boots he was wearing. “your father made me those boots four years ago, and i’ve been wearing them ever since—perfectly wonderful boots—well now, look here, stubbins. you’ve got to change those wet things—and quick. wait a moment till i get some more candles lit, and then we’ll go upstairs and find some dry clothes. you’ll have to wear an old suit of mine till we can get yours dry again by the kitchen-fire.”

so presently when more candles had been lighted round different parts of the house, we went upstairs; and when we had come into a bedroom the doctor opened a big wardrobe and took out two suits of old clothes. these we put on. then we carried our wet ones down to the kitchen and started a fire in the big chimney. the coat of the doctor’s which i was wearing was so large for me that i kept treading on my own coat-tails while i was helping to fetch the wood up from the cellar. but very soon we had a huge big fire blazing up the chimney and we hung our wet clothes around on chairs.

“now let’s cook some supper,” said the doctor.—“you’ll stay and have supper with me, stubbins, of course?”

already i was beginning to be very fond of this funny little man who called me “stubbins,” instead of “tommy” or “little lad” (i did so hate to be called “little lad”!) this man seemed to begin right away treating me as though i were a grown-up friend of his. and when he asked me to stop and have supper with him i felt terribly proud and happy. but i suddenly remembered that i had not told my mother that i would be out late. so very sadly i answered,

“thank you very much. i would like to stay, but i am afraid that my mother will begin to worry and wonder where i am if i don’t get back.”

“oh, but my dear stubbins,” said the doctor, throwing another log of wood on the fire, “your clothes aren’t dry yet. you’ll have to wait for them, won’t you? by the time they are ready to put on we will have supper cooked and eaten—did you see where i put my bag?”

“i think it is still in the hall,” i said. “i’ll go and see.”

i found the bag near the front door. it was made of black leather and looked very, very old. one of its latches was broken and it was tied up round the middle with a piece of string.

“thank you,” said the doctor when i brought it to him.

“was that bag all the luggage you had for your voyage?” i asked.

“yes,” said the doctor, as he undid the piece of string. “i don’t believe in a lot of baggage. it’s such a nuisance. life’s too short to fuss with it. and it isn’t really necessary, you know—where did i put those sausages?”

the doctor was feeling about inside the bag. first he brought out a loaf of new bread. next came a glass jar with a curious metal top to it. he held this up to the light very carefully before he set it down upon the table; and i could see that there was some strange little water-creature swimming about inside. at last the doctor brought out a pound of sausages.

“now,” he said, “all we want is a frying-pan.”

we went into the scullery and there we found some pots and pans hanging against the wall. the doctor took down the frying-pan. it was quite rusty on the inside.

“dear me, just look at that!” said he. “that’s the worst of being away so long. the animals are very good and keep the house wonderfully clean as far as they can. dab-dab is a perfect marvel as a housekeeper. but some things of course they can’t manage. never mind, we’ll soon clean it up. you’ll find some silver-sand down there, under the sink, stubbins. just hand it up to me, will you?”

in a few moments we had the pan all shiny and bright and the sausages were put over the kitchen-fire and a beautiful frying smell went all through the house.

while the doctor was busy at the cooking i went and took another look at the funny little creature swimming about in the glass jar.

“what is this animal?” i asked.

“oh that,” said the doctor, turning round—“that’s a wiff-waff. its full name is hippocampus pippitopitus. but the natives just call it a wiff-waff—on account of the way it waves its tail, swimming, i imagine. that’s what i went on this last voyage for, to get that. you see i’m very busy just now trying to learn the language of the shellfish. they have languages, of that i feel sure. i can talk a little shark language and porpoise dialect myself. but what i particularly want to learn now is shellfish.”

“why?” i asked.

“well, you see, some of the shellfish are the oldest kind of animals in the world that we know of. we find their shells in the rocks—turned to stone—thousands of years old. so i feel quite sure that if i could only get to talk their language, i should be able to learn a whole lot about what the world was like ages and ages and ages ago. you see?”

“but couldn’t some of the other animals tell you as well?”

“i don’t think so,” said the doctor, prodding the sausages with a fork. “to be sure, the monkeys i knew in africa some time ago were very helpful in telling me about bygone days; but they only went back a thousand years or so. no, i am certain that the oldest history in the world is to be had from the shellfish—and from them only. you see most of the other animals that were alive in those very ancient times have now become extinct.”

“have you learned any shellfish language yet?” i asked.

“no. i’ve only just begun. i wanted this particular kind of a pipe-fish because he is half a shellfish and half an ordinary fish. i went all the way to the eastern mediterranean after him. but i’m very much afraid he isn’t going to be a great deal of help to me. to tell you the truth, i’m rather disappointed in his appearance. he doesn’t look very intelligent, does he?”

“no, he doesn’t,” i agreed.

“ah,” said the doctor. “the sausages are done to a turn. come along—hold your plate near and let me give you some.”

then we sat down at the kitchen-table and started a hearty meal.

it was a wonderful kitchen, that. i had many meals there afterwards and i found it a better place to eat in than the grandest dining-room in the world. it was so cozy and home-like and warm. it was so handy for the food too. you took it right off the fire, hot, and put it on the table and ate it. and you could watch your toast toasting at the fender and see it didn’t burn while you drank your soup. and if you had forgotten to put the salt on the table, you didn’t have to get up and go into another room to fetch it; you just reached round and took the big wooden box off the dresser behind you. then the fireplace—the biggest fireplace you ever saw—was like a room in itself. you could get right inside it even when the logs were burning and sit on the wide seats either side and roast chestnuts after the meal was over—or listen to the kettle singing, or tell stories, or look at picture-books by the light of the fire. it was a marvelous kitchen. it was like the doctor, comfortable, sensible, friendly and solid.

while we were gobbling away, the door suddenly opened and in marched the duck, dab-dab, and the dog, jip, dragging sheets and pillow-cases behind them over the clean tiled floor. the doctor, seeing how surprised i was, explained:

“they’re just going to air the bedding for me in front of the fire. dab-dab is a perfect treasure of a housekeeper; she never forgets anything. i had a sister once who used to keep house for me (poor, dear sarah! i wonder how she’s getting on—i haven’t seen her in many years). but she wasn’t nearly as good as dab-dab. have another sausage?”

the doctor turned and said a few words to the dog and duck in some strange talk and signs. they seemed to understand him perfectly.

“can you talk in squirrel language?” i asked.

“oh yes. that’s quite an easy language,” said the doctor. “you could learn that yourself without a great deal of trouble. but why do you ask?”

“because i have a sick squirrel at home,” i said. “i took it away from a hawk. but two of its legs are badly hurt and i wanted very much to have you see it, if you would. shall i bring it to-morrow?”

“well, if its leg is badly broken i think i had better see it to-night. it may be too late to do much; but i’ll come home with you and take a look at it.”

so presently we felt the clothes by the fire and mine were found to be quite dry. i took them upstairs to the bedroom and changed, and when i came down the doctor was all ready waiting for me with his little black bag full of medicines and bandages.

“come along,” he said. “the rain has stopped now.”

outside it had grown bright again and the evening sky was all red with the setting sun; and thrushes were singing in the garden as we opened the gate to go down on to the road.

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