you will not find greenton, or bayley's four-corners, as it is more usually designated, on any map of new england that i know of. it is not a town; it is not even a village; it is merely an absurd hotel. the almost indescribable place called greenton is at the intersection of four roads, in the heart of new hampshire, twenty miles from the nearest settlement of note, and ten miles from any railway station. a good location for a hotel, you will say. precisely; but there has always been a hotel there, and for the last dozen years it has been pretty well patronized—by one boarder. not to trifle with an intelligent public, i will state at once that, in the early part of this century, greenton was a point at which the mail-coach on the great northern route stopped to change horses and allow the passengers to dine. people in the county, wishing to take the early mail portsmouth-ward, put up overnight at the old tavern, famous for its irreproachable larder and soft feather-beds. the tavern at that time was kept by jonathan bayley, who rivalled his wallet in growing corpulent, and in due time passed away. at his death the establishment, which included a farm, fell into the hands of a son-in-law. now, though bayley left his son-in-law a hotel—which sounds handsome—he left him no guests; for at about the period of the old man's death the old stage-coach died also. apoplexy carried off one, and steam the other. thus, by a sudden swerve in the tide of progress, the tavern at the corners found itself high and dry, like a wreck on a sand-bank. shortly after this event, or maybe contemporaneously, there was some attempt to build a town at green-ton; but it apparently failed, if eleven cellars choked up with débris and overgrown with burdocks are any indication of failure. the farm, however, was a good farm, as things go in new hampshire, and tobias sewell, the son-in-law, could afford to snap his fingers at the travelling public if they came near enough—which they never did.
the hotel remains to-day pretty much the same as when jonathan bayley handed in his accounts in 1840, except that sewell hasfrom time to time sold the furniture of some of the upper chambers to bridal couples in the neighborhood. the bar is still open, and the parlor door says parlour in tall black letters. now and then a passing drover looks in at that lonely bar-room, where a high-shouldered bottle of santa cruz rum ogles with a peculiarly knowing air a shrivelled lemon on a shelf; now and then a farmer rides across country to talk crops and stock and take a friendly glass with tobias; and now and then a circus caravan with speckled ponies, or a menagerie with a soggy elephant, halts under the swinging sign, on which there is a dim mail-coach with four phantomish horses driven by a portly gentleman whose head has been washed off by the rain. other customers there are none, except that one regular boarder whom have mentioned.
if misery makes a man acquainted with strange bed-fellows, it is equally certain that the profession of surveyor and civil engineer often takes one into undreamed-of localities. i had never heard of greenton until my duties sent me there, and kept me there two weeks in the dreariest season of the year. i do not think i would, of my own volition, have selected greenton for a fortnight's sojourn at any time; but now the business is over, i shall never regret the circumstances that made me the guest of tobias sewell, and brought me into intimate relations with miss mehetabel's son.
it was a black october night in the year of grace 1872, that discovered me standing in front of the old tavern at the corners.
though the ten miles' ride from k——— had been depressing, especially the last five miles, on account of the cold autumnal rain that had set in, i felt a pang of regret on hearing the rickety open wagon turn round in the road and roll off in the darkness. there were no lights visible anywhere, and only for the big, shapeless mass of something in front of me, which the driver had said was the hotel, i should have fancied that i had been set down by the roadside. i was wet to the skin and in no amiable humor; and not being able to find bell-pull or knocker, or even a door, i belabored the side of the house with my heavy walking-stick. in a minute or two i saw a light flickering somewhere aloft, then i heard the sound of a window opening, followed by an exclamation of disgust as a blast of wind extinguished the candle which had given me an instantaneous picture en silhouette of a man leaning out of a casement.
“i say, what do you want, down there?” inquired an unprepossessing voice.
“i want to come in; i want a supper, and a bed, and numberless things.”
“this is n't no time of night to go rousing honest folks out of their sleep. who are you, anyway?”
the question, superficially considered, was a very simple one, and i, of all people in the world, ought to have been able to answer it off-hand; but it staggered me. strangely enough, there came drifting across my memory the lettering on the back of a metaphysical work which i had seen years before on a shelf in the astor library. owing to an unpremeditatedly funny collocation of title and author, the lettering read as follows: “who am i? jones.” evidently it had puzzled jones to know who he was, or he would n't have written a book about it, and come to so lame and impotent a conclusion. it certainly puzzled me at that instant to define my identity. “thirty years ago,” i reflected, “i was nothing; fifty years hence i shall be nothing again, humanly speaking. in the mean time, who am i, sure-enough?” it had never before occurred to me what an indefinite article i was. i wish it had not occurred to me then. standing there in the rain and darkness, i wrestled vainly with the problem, and was constrained to fall back upon a yankee expedient.
“isn't this a hotel?” i asked finally,
“well, it is a sort of hotel,” said the voice, doubtfully. my hesitation and prevarication had apparently not inspired my interlocutor with confidence in me.
“then let me in. i have just driven over from k——— in this infernal rain. i am wet through and through.”
“but what do you want here, at the corners? what's your business? people don't come here, leastways in the middle of the night.”
“it is n't in the middle of the night,” i returned, incensed. “i come on business connected with the new road. i 'm the superintendent of the works.”
“oh!”
“and if you don't open the door at once, i'll raise the whole neighborhood—and then go to the other hotel.”
when i said that, i supposed greenton was a village with a population of at least three or four thousand and was wondering vaguely at the absence of lights and other signs of human habitation. surely, i thought, all the people cannot be abed and asleep at half past ten o'clock: perhaps i am in the business section of the town, among the shops.
“you jest wait,” said the voice above.
this request was not devoid of a certain accent of menace, and i braced myself for a sortie on the part of the besieged, if he had any such hostile intent. presently a door opened at the very place where i least expected a door, at the farther end of the building, in fact, and a man in his shirtsleeves, shielding a candle with his left hand, appeared on the threshold. i passed quickly into the house, with mr. tobias sewell (for this was mr. sewell) at my heels, and found myself in a long, low-studded bar-room.
there were two chairs drawn up before the hearth, on which a huge hemlock backlog was still smouldering, and on the un-painted deal counter contiguous stood two cloudy glasses with bits of lemon-peel in the bottom, hinting at recent libations. against the discolored wall over the bar hung a yellowed handbill, in a warped frame, announcing that “the next annual n. h. agricultural fair” would take place on the 10th of september, 1841. there was no other furniture or decoration in this dismal apartment, except the cobwebs which festooned the ceiling, hanging down here and there like stalactites.
mr. sewell set the candlestick on the mantel-shelf, and threw some pine-knots on the fire, which immediately broke into a blaze, and showed him to be a lank, narrow-chested man, past sixty, with sparse, steel-gray hair, and small, deep-set eyes, perfectly round, like a fish's, and of no particular color. his chief personal characteristics seemed to be too much feet and not enough teeth. his sharply cut, but rather simple face, as he turned it towards me, wore a look of interrogation. i replied to his mute inquiry by taking out my pocket-book and handing him my business-card, which he held up to the candle and perused with great deliberation.
“you 're a civil engineer, are you?” he said, displaying his gums, which gave his countenance an expression of almost infantile innocence. he made no further audible remark, but mumbled between his thin lips something which an imaginative person might have construed into “if you 're at civil engineer, i 'll be blessed if i would n't like to see an uncivil one!”
mr. sewell's growl, however, was worse than his bite—owing to his lack of teeth probably—for he very good-naturedly set himself to work preparing supper for me. after a slice of cold ham, and a warm punch, to which my chilled condition gave a grateful flavor, i went to bed in a distant chamber in a most amiable mood, feeling satisfied that jones was a donkey to bother himself about his identity.
when i awoke, the sun was several hours high. my bed faced a window, and by raising myself on one elbow i could look out on what i expected would be the main street. to my astonishment i beheld a lonely country road winding up a sterile hill and disappearing over the ridge. in a cornfield at the right of the road was a small private graveyard, enclosed by a crumbling stonewall with a red gate. the only thing suggestive of life was this little corner lot occupied by death. i got out of bed and went to the other window. there i had an uninterrupted view of twelve miles of open landscape, with mount agamenticus in the purple distance. not a house or a spire in sight. “well,” i exclaimed, “greenton does n't appear to be a very closely packed metropolis!” that rival hotel with which i had threatened mr. sewell overnight was not a deadly weapon, looking at it by daylight. “by jove!” i reflected, “maybe i 'm in the wrong place.” but there, tacked against a panel of the bedroom door, was a faded time-table dated greenton, august 1, 1839.
i smiled all the time i was dressing, and went smiling down stairs, where i found mr. sewell, assisted by one of the fair sex in the first bloom of her eightieth year, serving breakfast for me on a small table—in the bar-room!
“i overslept myself this morning,” i remarked apologetically, “and i see that i am putting you to some trouble. in future, if you will have me called, i will take my meals at the usual table de hôte.”
“at the what?” said mr. sewell.
“i mean with the other boarders.”
mr. sewell paused in the act of lifting a chop from the fire, and, resting the point of his fork against the woodwork of the mantelpiece, grinned from ear to ear.
“bless you! there is n't any other boarders. there has n't been anybody put up here sence—let me see—sence father-in-law died, and that was in the fall of '40. to be sure, there 's silas; he's a regular boarder; but i don't count him.”
mr. sewell then explained how the tavern had lost its custom when the old stage line was broken up by the railroad. the introduction of steam was, in mr. sewell's estimation, a fatal error. “jest killed local business. carried it off, i 'm darned if i know where. the whole country has been sort o' retrograding ever sence steam was invented.”
“you spoke of having one boarder,” i said.
“silas? yes; he come here the summer 'tilda died—she that was 'tilda bayley—and he 's here yet, going on thirteen year. he could n't live any longer with the old man. between you and i, old clem jaffrey, silas's father, was a hard nut. yes,” said mr. sewell, crooking his elbow in inimitable pantomime, “altogether too often. found dead in the road hugging a three-gallon demijohn. habeas corpus in the barn,” added mr. sewell, intending, i presume, to intimate that a post-mortem examination had been deemed necessary. “silas,” he resumed, in that respectful tone which one should always adopt when speaking of capital, “is a man of considerable property; lives on his interest, and keeps a hoss and shay. he 's a great scholar, too, silas; takes all the pe-ri-odicals and the police gazette regular.”
mr. sewell was turning over a third chop, when the door opened and a stoutish, middle-aged little gentleman, clad in deep black, stepped into the room.
“silas jaffrey,” said mr. sewell, with a comprehensive sweep of his arm, picking up me and the new-comer on one fork, so to speak. “be acquainted!”
mr. jaffrey advanced briskly, and gave me his hand with unlooked-for cordiality. he was a dapper little man, with a head as round and nearly as bald as an orange, and not unlike an orange in complexion, either; he had twinkling gray eyes and a pronounced roman nose, the numerous freckles upon which were deepened by his funereal dress-coat and trousers. he reminded me of alfred de musset's blackbird, which, with its yellow beak and sombre plumage, looked like an undertaker eating an omelet.
“silas will take care of you,” said mr. sewell, taking down his hat from a peg behind the door. “i 've got the cattle to look after. tell him, if you want anything.”
while i ate my breakfast, mr. jaffrey hopped up and down the narrow bar-room and chirped away as blithely as a bird on a cherry-bough, occasionally ruffling with his fingers a slight fringe of auburn hair which stood up pertly round his head and seemed to possess a luminous quality of its own.
“don't i find it a little slow up here at the corners? not at all, my dear sir. i am in the thick of life up here. so many interesting things going on all over the world—inventions, discoveries, spirits, railroad disasters, mysterious homicides. poets, murderers, musicians, statesmen, distinguished travellers, prodigies of all kinds turning up everywhere. very few events or persons escape me. i take six daily city papers, thirteen weekly journals, all the monthly magazines, and two quarterlies. i could not get along with less. i could n't if you asked me. i never feel lonely. how can i, being on intimate terms, as it were, with thousands and thousands of people? there's that young woman out west. what an entertaining creature she is!—now in missouri, now in indiana, and now in minnesota, always on the go, and all the time shedding needles from various parts of her body as if she really enjoyed it! then there 's that versatile patriarch who walks hundreds of miles and saws thousands of feet of wood, before breakfast, and shows no signs of giving out. then there's that remarkable, one may say that historical colored woman who knew benjamin franklin, and fought at the battle of bunk—no, it is the old negro man who fought at bunker hill, a mere infant, of course, at that period. really, now, it is quite curious to observe how that venerable female slave—formerly an african princess—is repeatedly dying in her hundred and eleventh year, and coming to life again punctually every six months in the small-type paragraphs. are you aware, sir, that within the last twelve years no fewer than two hundred and eighty-seven of general washington's colored coachmen have died?”
for the soul of me i could not tell whether this quaint little gentleman was chaffing me or not. i laid down my knife and fork, and stared at him.
“then there are the mathematicians!” he cried vivaciously, without waiting for a reply. “i take great interest in them. hear this!” and mr. jaffrey drew a newspaper from a pocket in the tail of his coat, and read as follows: “it has been estimated that if all the candles manufactured by this eminent firm (stearine & co.) were placed end to end, they would reach 2 and 7/8 times around the globe. of course,” continued mr. jaffrey, folding up the journal reflectively, “abstruse calculations of this kind are not, perhaps, of vital importance, but they indicate the intellectual activity of the age. seriously, now,” he said, halting in front of the table, “what with books and papers and drives about the country, i do not find the days too long, though i seldom see any one, except when i go over to k——— for my mail. existence may be very full to a man who stands a little aside from the tumult and watches it with philosophic eye. possibly he may see more of the battle than those who are in the midst of the action. once i was struggling with the crowd, as eager and undaunted as the best; perhaps i should have been struggling still. indeed, i know my life would have been very different now if i had married mehetabel—if i had married mehetabel.”
his vivacity was gone, a sudden cloud had come over his bright face, his figure seemed to have collapsed, the light seemed to have faded out of his hair. with a shuffling step, the very antithesis of his brisk, elastic tread, he turned to the door and passed into the road.
“well,” i said to myself, “if greenton had forty thousand inhabitants, it could n't turn out a more astonishing old party than that!”