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CHAPTER XX

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mlle de saint-geneix went out with such energetic resolution that madame de villemer dared not say another word to detain her. she saw that caroline was irritated and hurt. she blamed herself for having made it too evident that "she knew all," while the poor woman actually knew nothing, for she did not perceive caroline's real affection.

so far was she from this that she tried to persuade herself caroline had always loved the duke, that she had sacrificed herself to his happiness, or that, perhaps, like a practical girl, she was counting upon the return of his friendship after the honeymoon of his marriage. "in the latter case," thought the marchioness, "it would be dangerous to let her remain in the house. some time or other it would bring unhappiness into my young household; but it is too soon to have her go away—and so abruptly: the marquis would be almost insane. she will grow calm, lay her plans, and whenever she returns with them i will persuade her to accommodate herself to mine."

for an hour, then, the marchioness was engaged upon her own plans. she would see her son again that evening, as had been agreed, and would tell him that she had sounded caroline's inclinations, and found her very cold toward him. for several days she would avoid the decisive explanation. she would gain time, she would induce caroline herself to discourage him, but gently and with prudence. in a word she was planning to control the fates, when she saw the hour had passed and caroline had failed to come. she inquired for her. she was told that mlle de saint-geneix had gone away in a hackney-coach with a very small bundle, leaving behind the following letter:—

"madame de villemer,—

"i have just received the sad news that one of my sister's children is seriously ill. pardon me for hastening to her at once without having asked your leave; you have visitors. besides, i know how kind you are; you will surely give me twenty-four hours. i shall be back by to-morrow evening. receive the assurance of my tender and profound regard.

caroline."

"well now, that is admirable!" said the marchioness to herself after a moment of surprise and fright. "she enters into my ideas; she has enabled me to win the first evening, the hardest of all certainly. by promising to come back to-morrow night she keeps my son from rushing away to étampes. to-morrow probably she will have a new pretext for not returning—but i would rather not know what she means to do. i shall then be sure that the marquis will never get the truth from me."

nevertheless, the evening came too soon for her comfort. her fears increased as she saw the hour approaching when they would have to dine together.

if caroline had really fled a little farther than étampes, it was necessary to gain time. she then decided upon telling an untruth. she never spoke to her son until they were just seating themselves at table, contriving to keep herself surrounded by others. it was a great dinner, very ceremonious; but unable to bear the anxious gaze which he fastened upon her, before taking her seat she said to the young duchess, in such a way as to be overheard by the marquis, "mlle de saint-geneix will not come to dinner. she has a little niece ill at the convent, and has asked leave to go and see her."

immediately after dinner the marquis, tortured with anxiety, tried to speak to his mother. she avoided him again; but, seeing him preparing to go out, she made signs for him to come near and whispered to him: "she has n't gone to the convent, but to étampes."

"then why did n't you tell us so awhile ago?"

"i was mistaken. i had scarcely read the note, which was just given me this evening. it is not the little girl who is mentioned, but another of the children; however, she will return to-morrow morning. come! there is nothing alarming in this. be careful, my son, your bewildered face astonishes every one. there are ill-disposed persons everywhere: what if some one should happen to think and say that you were envious of your brother's happiness! it is known that at first it was you—"

"ah! mother, that is the very thing! you are keeping something from me. it is caroline who is ill. she is here, i am sure of it. let me inquire on your behalf—"

"do you want to compromise her, then? that would be no way to prepossess her in your favor."

"she is not well disposed toward me, then? mother, you have spoken to her."

"no, i have n't seen her; she went away this morning."

"you said the note came this evening."

"i received it—some time, i can't tell when; but these questions are not very amiable, my son. pray be calm; we are observed."

the poor mother did not know how to tell a lie. her son's anguish pierced her to the heart. she struggled for an hour against the sight. every time he approached a door, she followed him with a glance which plainly told of her fear that he would go: their eyes would meet, and the marquis would remain, as if held by his mother's anxiety. she could not bear this long. she was broken down by the fatigue of the emotions she had endured for twenty-four hours; by the excitement of the festivity which, for several days, she had been trying to enliven with all her cleverness; and above all, by the violent effort she had made since dinner, to appear calm. she had herself conducted back to her own apartment, and there fainted in the arms of the marquis, who had followed her.

urbain lavished the most tender care on his mother, reproaching himself a thousand times for having agitated her; assuring her that he was composed, that he would not ask another question until she had recovered. he watched over her the whole night. the next day, finding her perfectly well, he ventured upon a few timid questions. she showed him caroline's note, and he waited patiently until evening. the evening brought a fresh note, dated at étampes. the child was better, but still so poorly that madame heudebert desired to keep caroline twenty-four hours longer.

the marquis promised to be patient for twenty-four hours more; but the next day, deceiving his mother with the pretence of going to ride with his brother and sister, he set out for étampes.

there he learned that caroline had really been with her sister, but had just set out again for paris. they must have passed each other on the way. it occurred to the marquis that on his arrival, which was evidently anticipated, one of the children was kept out of sight, and silence enjoined upon the others. he inquired after the little invalid, and asked to see him. camille replied that he was asleep and she was afraid to wake him. m. de villemer dared not urge the matter, and returned to paris seriously doubting madame heudebert's sincerity, and wholly unable to explain her embarrassed and absent-minded ways.

he hastened to his mother's; but caroline had not made her reappearance; she was perhaps at the convent. he went there to wait for her before the iron grate, and at the close of an hour he made up his mind to ask for her in the name of madame de villemer. he was told that she had not been seen there for the last five days. he returned a second time to the hôtel de xaintrailles; he awaited the evening; his mother still seemed ill, and he controlled himself. but on the morrow his courage finally broke down, and he sobbed at her feet, begging her to restore caroline, whom he still believed hidden in the convent by her orders.

madame de villemer really knew nothing further about it. she began to share her son's uneasiness. however, caroline had taken with her only a very small bundle of clothing; she could have had but little money, for she was in the habit of sending it all, as soon as she received it, to her family. she had left her jewels and her books behind; so she could not be very far off.

while the marquis was returning to the convent with a letter from his mother, who, overcome by his grief, was now really anxious to have him find caroline again,—the young lady, wrapped up and veiled to her chin, was alighting from a diligence just arrived from brioude, and, carrying her own bundle, was making her way alone along the picturesque boulevard of the town of le puy in velay, toward the station of another little stage-coach, which was just then setting out for issingeaux.

no one saw her face or thought of troubling himself to do so. she asked no questions, and seemed thoroughly acquainted with the country, its customs, and its localities.

nevertheless, she was there for the first time; but, resolute, active, and cautious, she had before leaving paris bought a guide-book, with a plan of the town and the surrounding country, which she had carefully studied on the way. she then got into the diligence for issingeaux, telling the driver she would stop at brives, that is, at about a league from le puy. there she alighted at the bridge of the loire, and disappeared, without asking her way of any one. she knew she had to follow the loire until it met the gâgne; then, directing her course toward the red rock, again follow the bed of the torrent flowing at its foot until she reached the first village. there could be no possible mistake. there were about three leagues to be traversed on foot in a wilderness, and it was midnight; but the road was smooth, and the moon came out clearly in a beautiful half-globe from among the great white clouds, driven back to the horizon by the winds of may.

where, then, was mlle de saint-geneix going in this fashion, in the depths of the night and the wilds of the mountain, through a bewildering country? has it been forgotten that she had here, in the village of lantriac, devoted friends and the safest of all retreats? her nurse, the good-wife peyraque, formerly justine lanion, had written her a second letter, about six weeks before, and caroline, remembering with certainty that she had never mentioned to the marquis or to any one of the family these letters, or these people, or this country, had accepted the stern suggestion of going there for a month or so, thus making sure that all traces of herself would be entirely lost. thence arose her precautions against being recognized on the way, and against exciting chance curiosity by asking questions.

she had gone to étampes to embrace her sister, and, after having told her all and intrusted her with all, except the secret feelings which disturbed her, she had burned her ships behind her by leaving a letter which, at the end of the week, was to be forwarded to madame de villemer. in this letter she announced that she had gone abroad, pretending to have found employment there, and begging that no anxiety should be felt on her account.

cumbered with her bundle, she was planning to leave it at the first house where she could effect an entrance, when she became aware of a train of ox-teams coming behind her. she waited for it. a family of teamsters, young and old, with a woman holding a child asleep under her cape, were transporting some great hewn logs,—intended to serve as carpenters' timber,—by means of a pair of solid little wheels, bound with ropes to each end of the log. there were six of these logs, each drawn by a yoke of oxen with a driver walking beside them. it was a caravan, which occupied a long space on the road.

"providence," thought caroline, "always helps those who rely upon it. here are carriages to choose from if i am weary."

she spoke to the first teamster. he shook his head: he understood only the dialect of the country. the second stopped, made her repeat her words, then shrugged his shoulders and resumed his walk: he understood no better than the first. a third made signs for her to address his wife, who was seated on one of the logs, her feet supported by a rope. caroline asked her, as she walked along, if they were going in the direction of laussonne. she did not wish to mention the name of lantriac, which was nearer, on the same road. the woman replied in french of very harsh accent, that they were going to laussonne, and that it was "far off,—yes, indeed!"

"will you let me fasten my bundle to one of these logs?"

the woman shook her head.

"is this a refusal?" returned caroline. "i do not ask it for nothing; i will pay you."

the same response came. in caroline's speech the mountaineer had understood only the name of laussonne.

caroline knew nothing of the dialect of the cévennes. it had formed no part of the early education she had received from her nurse. the music of justine's accent, however, had lingered in her memory, and she caught at the bright idea of imitating it, which she succeeded in doing so well that the ears of the peasant woman opened at once. she understood french measured out in this way, and even spoke it herself quite readily.

"sit down there, behind, on the next log," said she, "and give your bundle to my husband. come! we ask nothing for this, my daughter."

caroline thanked her and took a seat upon the log. the peasant made her a stirrup like that which held up the feet of his wife, and the rustic procession went on its way but slightly delayed by the ceremony. the husband, who walked close at hand, made no attempt to talk. the cévenol is grave, and if he is ever curious, he will not deign to let the fact appear. he contents himself with listening afterward to the comments of the women, who ask information boldly; but the logs were long, and caroline was too far from the female mountaineer to be in danger of any cross-questioning.

she thus passed at no great distance the red rock, which she mistook at first for an enormous ruined tower; but she recalled the stories of justine about this curiosity of her country, and recognized the strange dike, the indestructible volcanic monument, through whose pale shadow cast by the moon she was now journeying.

the narrow, winding road rose above the torrent little by little, growing so contracted that caroline was frightened to see her feet hanging in space over these awful depths. the wheels cut down into the earth soaked by the rains on the extreme edge of the dizzy slope; but the little oxen never swerved in the least; the driver kept on singing, standing a little way off when he could find no comfortable place near his log, and the nurse had a fashion of swaying back and forth that seemed to mask a vain struggle with sleep.

"bless me!" cried caroline to the husband, "have you no fear for your wife and child?"

he understood the gesture, if not the words, and called out to his wife not to drop the little one, then launched forth anew in a dismal air, which resembled a religious chant.

caroline soon became used to the dizziness; she would not be tempted into turning her back to the precipice, as the peasant motioned for her to do. the country was so fine and so strange, the splendor of the moon made it look so terrible, that she was unwilling to lose anything of the novel spectacle. in the angles of the ascent, when the oxen had turned the fore wheels, and the log still held the hind wheels to their former course until they threatened to go over the brink, the astonished traveller unconsciously stiffened herself up a little on her stirrup of rope. then the driver would speak to his oxen in a calm and gentle tone, and his voice, which seemed to adapt their docile steps to the least unevenness of the ground, reassured caroline as if it had been the voice of a mysterious spirit shaping her destiny.

"and yet why should i be afraid?" she asked herself. "why should i cling to a life which will be henceforth full of dread?—to a succession of days which in prospect are a hundred times more frightful than death! if i fell into this chasm, i should be instantly crushed. and even if i suffered an hour or two before my death, what would that be compared with the years of sorrow, loneliness, and perhaps despair, which await me!"

we see that caroline at last had owned to her love and her grief. their full extent she had not yet measured, and, as she thought about that instinctive love of life which had just made her shudder, bold as she was by nature, she tried to persuade herself that it was a presentiment,—a celestial promise of speedy relief. "who knows! perhaps i shall forget sooner than i think. have i any right to wish for death! can i even afford to give way to grief, and waste my strength! can my sister and her children do without me? do i want them to live on the charity of those who have driven me away? must i not soon go to work again, and, in order to work, shall i not be obliged to forget everything that is not work?"

and then she was troubled even by her own courage. "what," she said to herself again,—"what if this were only a snare of hope!" some of m. de villemer's words came back to her, and certain phrases in his book that showed a wonderful amount of energy, penetration, and perseverance. would such a man give up a plan he was bent upon, allowing himself to be deceived by stratagem, and would he not have in its highest power that divining sense which is a part of love!

"i have acted to no purpose; he will find me again, if he tries to find me. it is useless for me to have come here, though i am a hundred and fifty leagues off, and though it seems impossible for any one to think of my being here rather than elsewhere; for he will have that gift of second sight, if he loves me with all his strength. so it would be childish to run away and hide, if this were the whole of my defensive resistance. my heart must take up arms against him, and at any moment, no matter when, i must stand ready to face him, and say to him, 'suffer in vain or die if need be; i do not love you!'"

as she said this, caroline was seized by a sudden impulse to lean forward, quit the stirrup, and let herself fall into the abyss. at last, fatigue overcame her excitement; the road, which still led upward, was not so steep, and had turned away from the cleft of the ravine, leaving all danger behind. their slow progress, the monotonous swaying of the log, and the regular grinding of the yokes against the pole, had a quieting effect upon her. she watched the rocks as they passed slowly before her, under their fantastic lights, and the tree-tops, whose budding leafage resembled transparent clouds. it became quite cold as they rose above the valleys, and the keen air was benumbing. the torrent vanished into the depths, but its strong, fresh voice filled the night with wild harmonies. caroline felt her eyelids growing heavy. judging it could not be far from lantriac, and not wanting to be carried to laussonne, she jumped to the ground and walked on to rouse herself.

she knew lantriac was in a mountain gorge and that she would be very near it when she had lost sight of the torrent of the gâgne. at the end of a half-hour's walk, in fact, she saw the outlines of houses above the rocks, reclaimed her bundle, made the peasant take some money, though not without difficulty, evaded the curiosity of his wife, and stayed behind to let them pass through the village, exposed to the barking of the dogs and disturbing the rest of the villagers whom she hoped to find sound asleep again on her own arrival.

but nothing disturbs the sleep of the dwellers in a velay hamlet, and nothing awakens their dogs. the procession of timber went along; the teamsters still singing, the wheels rumbling heavily over the blocks of lava which, under pretext of paving the streets, in these inhospitable villages, form a system of defence far more impassably sure than the perilous roads by which you arrive.

caroline, noticing the deep silence which followed upon the noise of the wheels, ventured resolutely into the narrow and almost perpendicular street which was supposed to continue the highway. here her knowledge of the place came to a sudden stop. justine had never described the position of her house. the traveller, wishing to glide in quietly and arrange with the family to keep her incognito, resolved to avoid knocking anywhere or waking any one, and to wait for day, which could not be long in dawning. she laid her bundle down beside her on a wooden bench, and took her seat under the pent-house of the first cottage she came to. she gazed at the queer fantastic picture made by the roofs, brought into uneven and hard relief against the white clouds of the sky. the moon passed into the narrow zone left open between the neighboring pent-houses. the basin of a little fountain caught the clear moonlight in full, and a quarter of its circle sparkled under the fall of a slender spray of water from the rock. the peaceful aspect and continuous measured sound of this silvery water soon lulled our exhausted traveller to sleep.

"here is certainly a change within three days," said she to herself, placing her bundle so as to make it a rest for her weary head. "only last thursday, nevertheless, mlle de saint-geneix, in a dress of tulle, her neck and arms loaded with rare pearls, and her hair full of camellias, was dancing with the marquis de villemer, under the light of countless tapers, in one of the richest of parisian drawing-rooms. what would m. de villemer say now if he could see this pretended queen of the ball-room, wrapped in coarse woollen, lying at the door of a shed, her feet almost in the flowing water and her hands stiff with the cold? happily the moon is beautiful,—and here it is striking two o'clock! well, there is an hour more to be spent here, and since sleep will come whether or no, why, then, let it be welcome."

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