the young wife, when she enters her husband's home, is not, as in our own country, entering upon a new life as mistress of a house, with absolute control over all of her little domain. should her husband's parents be living, she becomes almost as their servant, and even her husband is unable to defend her from the exactions of her mother-in-law, should this new relative be inclined to make full use of the power given her by custom. happy is the girl whose husband has no parents. her comfort in life is materially increased by her husband's loss, for, instead of having to serve two masters, she will then have to serve only one, and that one more kind and thoughtful of her strength and comfort than the mother-in-law.
in japan the idea of a wife's duty to her husband includes no thought of companionship on terms of equality. the wife is[85] simply the housekeeper, the head of the establishment, to be honored by the servants because she is the one who is nearest to the master, but not for one moment to be regarded as the master's equal. she governs and directs the household, if it be a large one, and her position is one of much care and responsibility; but she is not the intimate friend of her husband, is in no sense his confidante or adviser, except in trivial affairs of the household. she appears rarely with him in public, is expected always to wait upon him and save him steps, and must bear all things from him with smiling face and agreeable manners, even to the receiving with open arms into the household some other woman, whom she knows to bear the relation of concubine to her own husband.
in return for this, she has, if she be of the higher classes, much respect and honor from those beneath her. she has, in many cases the real though often inconsiderate affection of her husband. if she be the mother of children, she is doubly honored, and if she be endowed with a good temper, good manners, and tact, she can render her position not only agreeable to[86] herself, but one of great usefulness to those about her. it lies with her alone to make the home a pleasant one, or to make it unpleasant. nothing is expected of the husband in this direction; he may do as he likes with his own, and no one will blame him; but if his home is not happy, even through his own folly or bad temper, the blame will fall upon his wife, who should by management do whatever is necessary to supply the deficiencies caused by her husband's shortcomings. in all things the husband goes first, the wife second. if the husband drops his fan or his handkerchief the wife picks it up. the husband is served first, the wife afterwards, and so on through the countless minuti? of daily life. it is not the idea of the strong man considering the weak woman, saving her exertion, guarding and deferring to her; but it is the less important waiting upon the more important, the servant deferring to her master.
but though the present position of a japanese wife is that of a dependent who owes all she has to her protector, and for whom she is bound to do all she can in return, the dependence is in many cases a[87] happy one. the wife's position, especially if she be the mother of children, is often pleasant, and her chief joy and pride lies in the proper conduct of her house and the training of her children. the service of her parents-in-law, however, must remain her first duty during their lifetime. she must make it her care to see that they are waited upon and served with what they like at meals, that their clothes are carefully and nicely made, and that countless little attentions are heaped upon them. as long as her mother-in-law lives, the latter is the real ruler of the house; and though in many cases the elder lady prefers freedom from responsibility to the personal superintendence of the details of housekeeping, she will not hesitate to require of her daughter-in-law that the house be kept to her satisfaction. if the maiden's lot is to be the first daughter-in-law in a large family, she becomes simply the one of the family from whom the most drudgery is expected, who obtains the fewest favors, and who is expected to have always the pleasantest of tempers under circumstances not altogether conducive to repose of spirit. the wife of the oldest son has, however,[88] the advantage that, when her mother-in-law dies or retires, she becomes the mistress of the house and the head lady of the family, a position for which her apprenticeship to the old lady has probably exceptionally well fitted her.
next to her parents-in-law, her duty is to her husband. she must herself render to him the little services that a european expects of his valet. she must not only take care of his clothing, but must bring it to him and help him put it on, and must put away with care whatever he has taken off; and she often takes pride in doing with her own hands many acts of service which might be left to servants, and which are not actually demanded of her, unless she has no one under her to do them. in the poorer families all the washing, sewing, and mending that is required is always done by the wife; and even the empress herself is not exempt from these duties of personal service, but must wait upon her husband in various ways.
when the earliest beams of the sun shine in at the cracks of the dark wooden shutters which surround the house at night, the young wife in the family softly[89] arises, puts out the feeble light of the andon,[15] which has burned all night, and, quietly opening one of the sliding doors, admits enough light to make her own toilet. she dresses hastily, only putting a few touches here and there to her elaborate coiffure, which she has not taken down for her night's rest.[16] next she goes to arouse the servants, if they are not already up, and with them prepares the modest breakfast. when the little lacquer tables, with rice bowls, plates, and chopsticks are arranged in place, she goes softly to see whether her parents and husband are awake, and if they have hot water, charcoal fire, and whatever else they may need for their toilet. then with her own hands,[90] or with the help of the servants, she slides back the wooden shutters, opening the whole house to the fresh morning air and sunlight. it is she, also, who directs the washing and wiping of the polished floors, and the folding and putting away of the bedding, so that all is in readiness before the morning meal.
when breakfast is over, the husband starts for his place of business, and the little wife is in waiting to send him off with her sweetest smile and her lowest bow, after having seen that his foot-gear—whether sandal, clog, or shoe—is at the door ready for him to put on, his umbrella, book, or bundle at hand, and his kuruma waiting for him.
certainly a japanese man is lucky in having all the little things in his life attended to by his thoughtful wife,—a good, considerate, careful body-servant, always on hand to bear for him the trifling worries and cares. there is no wonder that there are no bachelors in japan. to some degree, i am sure, the men appreciate these attentions; for they often become much in love with their sweet, helpful wives, though they do not share with them[91] the greater things of life, the ambitions and the hopes of men.
the husband started on his daily rounds, the wife settles down to the work of the house. her sphere is within her home, and though, unlike other asiatic women, she goes without restraint alone through the streets, she does not concern herself with the great world, nor is she occupied with such a round of social duties as fill the lives of society women in this country. yet she is not barred out from all intercourse with the outer world, for there are sometimes great dinner parties, given perhaps at home, when she must appear as hostess, side by side with her husband, and share with him the duty of entertaining the guests. there are, besides, smaller gatherings of friends of her husband, when she must see that the proper refreshments are served, if they be only the omnipresent tea and cake. she may, perhaps, join in the number and listen to the conversation; but if there are no ladies, she will probably not appear, except to attend to the wants of her guests. there are also lady visitors—friends and relatives—who come to make calls, oftentimes from a[92] distance, and nearly always unexpectedly, whose entertainment devolves on the wife. owing to the great distances in many of the cities, and the difficulties that used to attend going from place to place, it has become a custom not to make frequent visits, but long ones at long intervals. a guest often stays several hours, remaining to lunch or dinner, as the case may be, and, should the distance be great, may spend the night. so rigid are the requirements of japanese hospitality that no guest is ever allowed to leave a house without having been pressed to partake of food, if it be only tea and cake. even tradesmen or messengers who come to the house must be offered tea, and if carpenters, gardeners, or workmen of any kind are employed about the house, tea must be served in the middle of the afternoon with a light lunch, and tea sent out to them often during their day's work. if a guest arrives in jinrikisha, not only the guest, but the jinrikisha men must be supplied with refreshments. all these things involve much thought and care on the part of the lady of the house.
in the homes of rich and influential men of wide acquaintance, there is a great deal[93] going on to make a pleasant variety for the ladies of the household, even although the variety involves extra work and responsibility. the mistress of such a household sees and hears a great deal of life; and her position requires no little wisdom and tact, even where the housewife has the assistance of good servants, capable, as many are, of sharing not only the work, but the responsibility as well. clever wives in such homes see and learn much, in an indirect way, of the outside world in which the men live; and may become, if they possess the natural capabilities for the work, wise advisers and sympathizers with their husbands in many things far beyond their ordinary field of action. an intelligent woman, with a strong will, has often been, unseen and unknown, a mighty influence in japan. that her power for good or bad, outside of her influence as wife and mother, is a recognized fact, is seen in the circumstance that in novels and plays women are frequently brought in as factors in political plots and organized rebellions, as well as in acts of private revenge.
still the life of the average woman is a[94] quiet one, with little to interrupt the monotony of her days with their never-ending round of duties; and to the most secluded homes only an occasional guest comes to enliven the dull hours. the principal occupation of the wife, outside of her housekeeping and the little duties of personal service to husband and parents, is needle-work. every japanese woman (excepting those of the highest rank) knows how to sew, and makes not only her own garments and those of her children, but her husband's as well. sewing is one of the essentials in the education of a japanese girl, and from childhood the cutting and putting together of crêpe, silk, and cotton is a familiar occupation to her. though japanese garments seem very simple, custom requires that each stitch and seam be placed in just such a way; and this way is something of a task to learn. to the uninitiated foreigner, the general effect of the loosely worn kimono is the same, whether the garment be well or ill made; but the skillful seamstress can easily discover that this seam is not turned just as it should be, or that those stitches are too long or too short, or carelessly or unevenly set.
[95]
fancy work[17] or embroidery is not done in the house, the gorgeous embroidered japanese robes being the product of professional workmen. instead of the endless fancy work with silks, crewels, or worsteds, over which so many american ladies spend their leisure hours, many of the japanese ladies, even of the highest rank, devote much time to the cultivation of the silkworm. in country homes, and in the great cities as well, wherever spacious grounds afford room for the growth of mulberry trees, silkworms are raised and watched with care; an employment giving much pleasure to those engaged in it.
it is difficult for any one who has not experimented in this direction to realize how tender these little spinners are. if a strong breeze blow upon them, they are likely to suffer for it, and the least change in the atmosphere must be guarded against. for forty days they must be carefully watched, and the great, shallow, bamboo basket trays containing them changed almost daily. new leaves for their food[96] must be given frequently, and as the least dampness might be fatal, each leaf, in case of rainy weather, is carefully wiped. then, too, the different ages of the worms must be considered in preparing their food; as, for the young worms, the leaves should be cut up, while for the older ones it is better to serve them whole. when, finally, the buzzing noise of the crunching leaves has ceased, and the last worm has put himself to sleep in his precious white cocoon, the work of the ladies is ended; for the cocoons are sent to women especially skilled in the work, by them to be spun off, and the thread afterwards woven into the desired fabric. when at last the silk, woven and dyed, is returned to the ladies by whose care the worms were nourished until their work was done, it is shown with great pride as the product of the year's labor, and if given as a present will be highly prized by the recipient.
among the daily tasks of the housewife, one, and by no means the least of her duties, is to receive, duly acknowledge, and return in suitable manner, the presents received in the family. presents are not confined to special seasons, although upon[97] certain occasions etiquette is rigid in its requirements in this matter, but they may be given and received at all times, for the japanese are pre?minently a present-giving nation. for every present received, sooner or later, a proper return must be sent, appropriate to the season and to the rank of the receiver, and neatly arranged in the manner that etiquette prescribes. presents are not necessarily elaborate; callers bring fruit of the season, cake, or any delicacy, and a visit to a sick person must be accompanied by something appropriate. children visiting in the family are always given toys, and for this purpose a stock is kept on hand. the present-giving culminates at the close of the year, when all friends and acquaintances exchange gifts of more or less value, according to their feelings and means. should there be any one who has been especially kind, and to whom return should be made, this is the time to do so.
tradesmen send presents to their patrons, scholars to teachers, patients to their physicians, and, in short, it is the time when all obligations and debts are paid off, in one way or another. on the[98] seventh day of the seventh month, there is another general interchange of presents, although not so universal as at the new year. it can easily be imagined that all this present-giving entails much care, especially in families of influence; and it must be attended to personally by the wife, who, in the secret recesses of her storeroom, skillfully manages to rearrange the gifts received, so that those not needed in the house may be sent, not back to their givers, but to some place where a present is due. the passing-on of the presents is an economy not of course acknowledged, but frequently practiced even in the best families, as it saves much of the otherwise ruinous expense of this custom.
as time passes by, occasional visits are paid by the young wife to her own parents or to other relatives. at stated times, too, she, and others of the family, will visit the tombs of her husband's ancestors, or of her own parents, if they are no longer living, to make offerings and prayers at the graves, to place fresh branches of the sakaki[18] before the tombs, and to see that[99] the priests in charge of the cemetery have attended to all the little things which the japanese believe to be required by the spirits of the dead. even these visits are often looked forward to as enlivening the monotony of the humdrum home life. sometimes all the members of the family go together on a pleasure excursion, spending the day out of doors, in beautiful gardens, when some one of the much-loved flowers of the nation is in its glory; and the little wife may join in this pleasure with the rest, but more often she is the one who remains at home to keep the house in the absence of others. the theatre, too, a source of great amusement to japanese ladies, is often a pleasure reserved for a time later in life.
the japanese mother takes great delight and comfort in her children, and her constant thought and care is the right direction of their habits and manners. she seems to govern them entirely by gentle admonition, and the severest chiding that is given them is always in a pleasant voice, and accompanied by a smiling face. no matter how many servants there may be, the mother's influence [100]is always direct and personal. no thick walls and long passageways separate the nursery from the grown people's apartments, but the thin paper partitions make it possible for the mother to know always what her children are doing, and whether they are good and gentle with their nurses, or irritable and passionate. the children never leave the house, nor return to it, without going to their mother's room, and there making the little bows and repeating the customary phrases used upon such occasions. in the same way, when the mother goes out, all the servants and the children escort her to the door; and when her attendant shouts "o kaeri," which is the signal of her return, children and servants hasten to the gate to greet her, and do what they can to help her from her conveyance and make her home-coming pleasant and restful.
the father has little to do with the training of his children, which is left almost entirely to the mother, and, except for the interference of the mother-in-law, she has her own way in their training, until they are long past childhood. the children are taught to look to the father[101] as the head, and to respect and obey him as the one to whom all must defer; but the mother comes next, almost as high in their estimation, and, if not so much feared and respected, certainly enjoys a larger share of their love.
the japanese mother's life is one of perfect devotion to her children; she is their willing slave. her days are spent in caring for them, her evenings in watching over them; and she spares neither time nor trouble in doing anything for their comfort and pleasure. in sickness,[19] in health, day and night, the little ones are her one thought; and from the home of the noble to the humble cot of the peasant, this tender mother-love may be seen in all its different phases. the japanese woman has so few on whom to lavish her affection, so little to live for beside her children, and no hopes in the future except through them, that it is no wonder that[102] she devotes her life to their care and service, deeming the drudgery that custom requires of her for them the easiest of all her duties. even with plenty of servants, the mother performs for her children nearly all the duties often delegated to nurses in this country. mother and babe are rarely separated, night or day, during the first few years of the baby's life, and the mother denies herself any entertainment or journey from home when the baby cannot accompany her. to give the husband any share in the baby-work would be an unheard-of thing, and a disgrace to the wife; for in public and in private the baby is the mother's sole charge, and the husband is never asked to sit up all night with a sick baby, or to mind it in any way at all. nothing in all one's study of japanese life seems more beautiful and admirable than the influence of the mother over her children,—an influence that is gentle and all-pervading, bringing out all that is sweetest and noblest in the feminine character, and affording the one almost unlimited opportunity of a japanese woman's life. the lot of a childless wife in japan is a sad[103] one. not only is she denied the hopes and the pleasures of a mother in her children, but she is an object of pity to her friends, and well does she know that confucius has laid down the law that a man is justified in divorcing a childless wife. all feel that through her, innocent though she is, the line has ceased; that her duty is unfulfilled; and that, though the name be given to adopted sons, there is no heir of the blood. a man rarely sends away his wife solely with this excuse, but children are the strongest of the ties which bind together husband and wife, and the childless wife is far less sure of pleasing her husband. in many cases she tries to make good her deficiencies by her care of adopted children; in them she often finds the love which fills the void in her heart and home, and she receives from them in after-life the respect and care which is the crown of old age.
we have hitherto spoken of married life when the wife is received into her husband's home. another interesting side of japanese marriage is when a man enters the wife's family, taking her name and becoming entirely one of her family, as[104] usually the wife becomes of the husband's. when there are daughters but no sons in a family to inherit the name, one of three things may happen: a son may be adopted early in life and grow up as heir; or he may be adopted with the idea of marrying one of the daughters; or, again, no one may have been formally adopted, but on the eldest daughter's coming to a marriageable age, her family and friends seek for her a yoshi, that is to say, some man (usually a younger son) who is willing and able to give up his family name, and, by marrying the daughter, become a member of her family and heir to the name. he cuts off all ties from his own family, and becomes a member of hers, and the young couple are expected to live with her parents. in this case the tables are turned, and it is he who has to dread the mother-in-law; it is his turn to have to please his new relatives and to do all he can to be agreeable. he, too, may be sent away and divorced by the all-powerful parents, if he does not please; and such divorces are not uncommon. of course, in such marriages, the woman has the greater power, and the man has to remember what he owes her;[105] and though the woman yields to him obediently in all respects, it is an obedience not demanded by the husband, as under other circumstances. in such marriages the children belong to the family whose name they bear, so that in case of divorce they remain in the wife's family, unless some special arrangement is made about them.
it may be wondered why young men ever care to enter a family as yoshi. there is only one answer,—it is the attraction of wealth and rank, very rarely that of the daughter herself. in the houses of rich daimios without sons, yoshi are very common, and there are many younger sons of the nobility, themselves of high birth, but without prospects, who are glad enough to become great lords. in feudal times, the number of samurai families was limited. several sons of one family could not establish different samurai families, but all but the eldest son, if they formed separate houses, must enroll themselves among the ranks of the common people. hence the younger sons were often adopted into other samurai families as yoshi, where it was desired to secure a succession to a name that must otherwise die out. since the restoration, [106]and the breaking down of the old class distinctions, young men care more for independence than for their rank as samurai; and it is now quite difficult to find yoshi to enter samurai families, unless it be because of the attractiveness and beauty of the young lady herself. many a young girl who could easily make a good marriage with some suitable husband, could she enter his family, is now obliged to take some inferior man as yoshi, because few men in these days are willing to change their names, give up their independence, and take upon themselves the support of aged parents-in-law; for this also is expected of the yoshi, unless the family that he enters is a wealthy one.
from this custom of yoshi, and its effect upon the wife's position, we see that, in certain cases, japanese women are treated as equal with men. it is not because of their sex that they are looked down upon and held in subjection, but it is because of their almost universal dependence of position. the men have the right of inheritance, the education, habits of self-reliance, and are the bread-winners. wherever the tables are turned, and the men are dependents [107]of the women, and even where the women are independent of the men,—there we find the relations of men to women vastly changed. the women of japan must know how to do some definite work in the world beyond the work of the home, so that their position will not be one of entire dependence upon father, husband, or son. if fathers divided their estates between sons and daughters alike, and women were given, before the law, right to hold property in their own names, much would be accomplished towards securing them in their positions as wives and mothers; and divorce, the great evil of japanese home life to-day, would become simply a last resort to preserve the purity of the home, as it is in most civilized countries now.
the difference between the women of the lower and those of the higher classes, in the matter of equality with their husbands, is quite noticeable. the wife of the peasant or merchant is much nearer to her husband's level than is the wife of the emperor. apparently, each step in the social scale is a little higher for the man than it is for the woman, and lifts him a[108] little farther above his wife. the peasant and his wife work side by side in the field, put their shoulders to the same wheel, eat together in the same room, at the same time, and whichever of them happens to be the stronger in character governs the house, without regard to sex. there is no great gulf fixed between them, and there is frequently a consideration for the wife shown by husbands of the lower class, that is not unlike what we see in our own country. i remember the case of a jinrikisha man employed by a friend of mine in tokyo, who was much laughed at by his friends because he actually used to spend some of his leisure moments in drawing the water required for his household from a well some distance away, and carrying the heavy buckets to the house, in order to save the strength of his little, delicate wife. that cases of such devotion are rare is no doubt true, but that they occur shows that there is here and there a recognition of the claims that feminine weakness has upon masculine strength.
a frequent sight in the morning, in tokyo, is a cart heavily laden with wood, charcoal, or some other country produce,[109] creaking slowly along the streets, propelled by a farmer and his family. sometimes one will see an old man, his son, and his son's wife with a baby on her back, all pushing or pulling with might and main; the woman with tucked-up skirts and tight-fitting blue trousers, a blue towel enveloping her head,—only to be distinguished from the men by her smaller size and the baby tied to her back. but when evening comes, and the load of produce has been disposed of, the woman and baby are seen seated upon the cart, while the two men pull it back to their home in some neighboring village. here, again, is the recognition of the law that governs the position of woman in this country,—the theory, not of inferior position, but of inferior strength; and the sight of the women riding back in the empty carts at night, drawn by their husbands, is the thing that strikes a student of japanese domestic life as nearest to the customs of our own civilization in regard to the relations of husbands and wives.
throughout the country districts, where the women have a large share in the labor that is directly productive of wealth, where[110] they not only work in the rice fields, pick the tea crops, gather the harvests, and help draw them to market, but where they have their own productive industries, such as caring for the silkworms, and spinning, and weaving both silk and cotton, we find the conventional distance between the sexes much diminished by the important character of feminine labor; but in the cities, and among the classes who are largely either indirect producers or non-producers, the only labor of the women is that personal service which we account as menial. it is for this reason, perhaps, that the gap widens as we go upward in society, and between the same social levels as we go cityward.
the wife of the countryman, though she may work harder and grow old earlier, is more free and independent than her city sister; and the wife of the peasant, pushing her produce to market, is in some ways happier and more considered than the wife of the noble, who must spend her life among her ladies-in-waiting, in the seclusion of her great house with its beautiful garden, the plaything of her husband in his leisure hours, but never his equal, or the sharer of his cares or of his thoughts.
[111]
one of the causes which must be mentioned as contributing to the lowering of the wife's position, among the higher and more wealthy classes, lies in the system of concubinage which custom allows, and the law until quite recently has not discouraged. from the emperor, who was, by the old chinese code of morals, allowed twelve supplementary wives, to the samurai, who are permitted two, the men of the higher classes are allowed to introduce into their families these mékaké, who, while beneath the wife in position, are frequently more beloved by the husband than the wife herself. it must be said, however, to the credit of many husbands, that in spite of this privilege, which custom allows, there are many men of the old school who are faithful to one wife, and never introduce this discordant element into the household. even should he keep mékaké, it is often unknown to the wife, and she is placed in a separate establishment of her own. and in spite of the code of morals requiring submission in any case on the part of the woman, there are many wives of the samurai and lower classes who have enough spirit and wit to prevent their husbands[112] from ever introducing a rival under the same roof. in this way the practice is made better than the theory.
not so with the more helpless wife of the nobleman, for wealth and leisure make temptation greater for the husband. she submits unquestioningly to the custom requiring that the wife treat these women with all civility. their children she may even have to adopt as her own. the lot of the mékaké herself is rendered the less endurable, from the american point of view, by the fact that, should the father of her child decide to make it his heir, the mother is thenceforth no more to it than any other of the servants of the household. for instance, suppose a hitherto childless noble is presented with a son by one of his concubines, and he decides by legal adoption to make that son his heir: the child at its birth, or as soon afterwards as is practicable, is taken from its mother and placed in other hands, and the mother never sees her own child until, on the thirtieth day after its birth, she goes with the other servants of the household to pay her respects to her young master. if it were not for the habit of abject obedience to parents which japanese [113]custom has exalted into the one feminine virtue, few women could be found of respectable families who would take a position so devoid of either honor or satisfaction of any kind as that of mékaké. that these positions are not sought after must be said, to the honor of japanese womanhood. a nobleman may obtain samurai women for his "o mékaké" (literally, honorable concubines), but they are never respected by their own class for taking such positions. in the same way the mékaké of samurai are usually from the héimin. no woman who has any chance of a better lot will ever take the unenviable position of mékaké.
a law which has recently been promulgated strikes at the root of this evil, and, if enforced, will in course of time go far toward extirpating it. henceforth in japan, no child of a concubine, or of adoption from any source, can inherit a noble title. the heir to the throne must hereafter be the son, not only of the emperor, but of the empress, or the succession passes to some collateral branch of the family. this law does not apply to prince haru, the present heir to the throne, as, although he is not the son of the empress, he was legally[114] adopted before the promulgation of the law; but should he die, it will apply to all future heirs.
that public opinion is moving in the right direction is shown by the fact that the young men of the higher classes do not care to marry the daughters of mékaké, be they ever so legally adopted by their own fathers. when the girls born of such unions become a drug in the matrimonial market, and the boys are unable to keep up the succession, the mékaké will go out of fashion, and the real wife will once more assume her proper importance.[20]
upon the 11th day of february, 1889, the day on which the emperor, by his own act in giving a constitution to the people, limited his own power for the sake of putting his nation upon a level with the most civilized nations of the earth, he at the[115] same time, and for the first time, publicly placed his wife upon his own level. in an imperial progress made through the streets of tokyo, the emperor and empress, for the first time in the history of japan, rode together in the imperial coach.[*] until then, the emperor, attended by his chief gentlemen-in-waiting and his guards, had always headed the procession, while the empress must follow at a distance with her own attendants. that this act on the part of the emperor signifies the beginning of a new and better era for the women of japan, we cannot but hope; for until the position of the wife and mother in japan is improved and made secure, little permanence can be expected in the progress of the nation toward what is best and highest in the western civilization. better laws, broader education for the women, a change in public opinion on the subject, caused by the study, by the men educated abroad, of the homes of europe and america,—these are the forces which alone can bring the women of japan up to that place in the home which their intellectual and moral qualities fit them to fill. that japan is infinitely ahead of other oriental countries[116] in her practices in this matter is greatly to her credit; but that she is far behind the civilized nations of europe and america, not only in practice but in theory, is a fact that is incontestable, and a fact that, unless changed, must sooner or later be a stumbling-block in the path of her progress toward the highest civilization of which she is capable.[21] the european practice cannot be grafted upon the asiatic theory, but the change in the home must be a radical one, to secure permanent good results. as long as the wife has no rights which the husband is bound to respect, no great advance[117] can be made, for human nature is too mean and selfish to give in all cases to those who are entirely unprotected by law, and entirely unable to protect themselves, those things which the moral nature declares to be their due. in the old slave times in the south, many of the negroes were better fed, better cared for, and happier than they are to-day; but they were nevertheless at the mercy of men who too often thought only of themselves, and not of the human bodies and souls over which they had unlimited power. it was a condition of things that could not be prevented by educating the masters so as to induce them to be kind to their slaves; it was a condition that was wrong in theory, and so could not be righted in practice. in the same way the position of the japanese wife is wrong in theory, and can never be righted until legislation has given to her rights which it still denies. education will but aggravate the trouble to a point beyond endurance. the giving to the wife power to obtain a divorce will not help much, but simply tend to weaken still further the marriage tie. nothing can help surely and permanently but the growth of a sound[118] public opinion, in regard to the position of the wife, that will, sooner or later, have its effect upon the laws of the country. legislation once effected, all the rest will come, and the wife, secure in her home and her children, will be at the point where her new education can be of use to her in the administration of her domestic affairs and the training of her children; and where she will finally become the friend and companion of her husband, instead of his mere waitress, seamstress, and housekeeper,—the plaything of his leisure moments, too often the victim of his caprices.
footnotes:
[15] the andon is the standing lamp, inclosed in a paper case, used as a night lamp in all japanese houses. until the introduction of kerosene lamps, the andon was the only light used in japanese houses. the light is produced by a pith wick floating in a saucer of vegetable oil.
[16] the pillow used by ladies is merely a wooden rest for the head, that supports the neck, leaving the elaborate head-dress undisturbed. the hair is dressed by a professional hair-dresser, who comes to the house once in two or three days. in some parts of japan, as in kioto, where the hair is even more elaborately dressed than in tokyo, it is much less frequently arranged. the process takes two hours at least.
[17] the one exception to this statement, so far as i know, is the species of silk mosaic made by the ladies in the daimios' houses. (see chap. vii.)
[18] sakaki, the cleyera japonica, a sacred plant emblematic of purity, and much used at funerals and in the decoration of graves.
[19] since the introduction of the foreign system of medicine and nursing, the japanese realize so acutely the lack of conveniences and appliances for nursing the sick in their own homes, that cases of severe or even serious illness are usually sent to hospitals, where the invalids can have the comforts that even the wealthy japanese homes cannot furnish.
[20] it is worth while to mention in this connection the noteworthy efforts made by the woman's christian temperance union of japan in calling the attention of the public to this custom, and in arousing public sentiment in favor of legislation against not only this system, but against the licensed houses of prostitution. though there has not yet been any practical result, much discussion has ensued in the newspapers and magazines, lectures have been given, and much strong feeling aroused, which may, before long, produce radical change.
[21] many of the thinking men of japan, though fully recognizing the injustice of the present position of woman in society, and the necessity of reform in the marriage and divorce laws, refuse to see the importance of any movement to change them. their excuse is, that such power in the hands of the husband over his wife might be abused, but that in fact it is not. wrongs and injustice are rare, they argue, and kind treatment, affection, and even respect for the wife is the general rule; and that the keeping of the power in the hands of the husband is better than giving too much freedom to women who are without education. these men wish to wait until every woman is educated, before acting in a reform movement, while many conservatives oppose the new system of education for girls as making them unwomanly. between these two parties, the few who really wish for a change are utterly unable to act.
