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CHAPTER XIII WHAT HAPPENED AT WHY.

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“oh! this is lovely!” cried girlie, as the balloon rose higher and higher, till the island with the solitary sphinx on it looked a mere speck in the sea below them. “will it take us long to get home?” she asked, after they had been floating along for some time.

“oh no, not long,” replied the royal microscopist. “what shall we do to pass away the time?”

“i know a little love story about a pig that i can repeat, if you wish,” suggested girlie. “it’s called ‘piggie’s courtship.’”

the wallypug and the royal microscopist both said that they should very much like to hear it, and the crow laughed and said, “oh, if it’s about 175a pig, i daresay you will repeat it very nicely.”

“what do you mean?” asked girlie.

“why, ‘birds of a feather flock together,’ and the same remark applies to pigs, i suppose,” he said, chuckling to himself.

girlie wisely did not take the slightest notice of this rude remark, but stood up and tried to curtsey, as she had been taught to do before beginning a recitation; curtseying in a balloon, though, while it is going up, is a most difficult thing to do, and poor girlie did not succeed very well in her attempt, for she first stumbled forward into the wallypug’s arms and then, trying to recover her balance, she fell back and sat plump into the royal microscopist’s lap.

they all had a good laugh at her misfortunes, and then girlie smilingly said that she thought that, under the circumstances, perhaps, she had better sit down to recite, and the others agreeing with her, she sat with one hand holding the side of the car and the other one resting in her lap while she repeated the following story which, as she explained, a young friend had recited at their last school entertainment just before the holidays:—

176“piggie’s courtship.

“a black and white pig, who’d been properly taught

to walk and to talk and behave as he ought,

went out one day,

in a casual way—

‘the fresh air would improve his complexion,’ he thought.

“having walked up and down all the streets in the town,

he thought he’d go into the fields and sit down.

so he rested awhile

by the old wooden stile,

and then hurried on with a dignified frown.

“he knocked at the door of a sty by the mill,

just to ask them about an old friend who was ill;

then trotted along,

softly humming a song,

till he finally reached the old oak on the hill.

“he threw himself down on the grass in the shade,

and complacently thought ‘what a picture he made!’

(of his black and white face,

and his form full of grace,

he thought just a trifle too much, i’m afraid.)

“he sat for a while much admiring the scene,

for the hedges, the trees, and the grass looked so green,

while the rippling rill,

at the foot of the hill,

just completed a view such as seldom is seen.

177“he thought about this, and he thought about that,

and wondered if ‘laughing did make one grow fat.’

‘he must build a new sty,’

he thought with a sigh,

for his old one was shabby, not fit for a rat.

“then he blushed when he heard a slight squeal on his right,

and a little white piggie came trotting in sight;

for this piggie, you see,

betwixt you and me,

was the one that he’d fallen in love with one night.

“the piggie looked shy when she saw him sit there,

and turned to go back with a most confused air,

when he ventured to say,

in a stammering way,

‘pray will you not rest for a while, lady fair?

178“she timidly came and sat down by his side;

and to make some remarks on the weather, he tried.

then they both laughed with glee

when from off the oak tree

a shower of large acorns fall down they espied.

“they begged they might take some, because, to be brief,

to take without asking would cause them both grief;

when they asked of the oak,

the old tree never spoke,

but only just boughed and thus gave them its leaf.

179“so they munched at the acorns and had a great feast,

and neither pig noticed the time in the least,

till the sun in the west

had sunk down to its rest,

and the silver moon rose o’er the hill in the east.

“then they trotted away down the hill side by side,

and they whispered sweet nothings, and each of them sighed,

then oh! what do you think?

by the silver stream’s brink,

the white piggie promised to be his sweet bride.

“before i quite bring this short tale to a close

i must tell you that piggie now wears in her nose

a lovely brass ring,

which is quite the right thing

for engaged little piggies to wear, i suppose.”

the wallypug and the royal microscopist both clapped their hands when girlie had finished, but the crow said in a scornful voice,—

“that’s a very old-fashioned kind of love story; they don’t write them like that at all, nowadays. this is how a modern love story goes”—and he took off his spectacles and held them in one claw while reciting the following verses:—

180

“a modern love story.

“the lady betsy mary jayne was very tall and somewhat plain. (indeed, does anybody doubt it?) sir robert richard peter prim was also tall and rather slim (well, please don’t make a fuss about it).

“they met each other quite by chance while touring in the south of france. (pray, why repeat such idle chatter?) she said she really wouldn’t wed; it drove the poor man off his head! (oh! did it? well, it doesn’t matter.)

“they met again, ’twas at a ball, and so got married after all. (don’t bother! no one cares a jot!) she turned out cross and rather ‘snappy,’ so even now they are not happy! (oh, aren’t they? who cares if they’re not?)”

181“well, i’m sure i like the way mine ends much the best,” said girlie, when he had finished.

“hear, hear!” said the royal microscopist, “so do i, my dear. i like the old-fashioned stories best, too; those that end with a smile and leave you feeling all the better and happier for having read them, and not all this new-fangled rubbish that ends up with a sneer and makes you feel miserable. what do you say, wallypug?”

“oh,” said the wallypug, who seemed to be anxious to please everybody, “i thought them both very pretty. but isn’t that why that i can see over there?” he said, pointing down to where the tops of some large buildings were just visible amongst the trees a long way below them.

“i believe it is,” said the royal microscopist, turning a tap and letting some gas escape so that the balloon began to descend rapidly.

they could soon see that the wallypug was right, for presently, they recognised the royal palace and the public hall.

“ah! i shall be very glad to get back again,” said the wallypug wistfully. “i am beginning to get very anxious about my people. how very quiet everything seems,” he went on as they floated over the town. and indeed the streets seemed to be quite deserted, and there was no one 182at all in sight, not even in the market place in front of the public hall.

“i hope nothing serious has happened,” thought girlie; for this mysterious silence frightened her, and she was very glad when the balloon slowly settled down in the gardens of the royal palace and they all got out.

the wallypug walked quickly towards the palace, looking very serious, and the others followed him in silence. on nearing the building they could hear voices raised in angry dispute, and, hurrying to the dining hall, whence the sounds proceeded, they threw the door open and beheld an extraordinary sight.

the room was in the utmost confusion, the remains of a feast occupying one end of the long table, while the rest of it was piled high with little bags of silver and gold. the doctor-in-law and the cockatoo sat at the table, the doctor-in-law with a very red face and the cockatoo looking very angry; they had evidently been quarrelling violently. they both looked up in surprise when they heard the door open, and the cockatoo screamed as the wallypug, followed by girlie and the royal microscopist, entered.

“what does all this mean?” said the wallypug in a stern voice and with a quiet dignity which seemed to come to him all at once.

183the cockatoo shrank back into her chair and the doctor-in-law hung his head and seemed to be stricken dumb.

“where are all my people?” demanded the wallypug in a firm voice. “answer me!”

“‘oh, pray forgive us,’ cried the doctor-in-law throwing himself on his knees.”

“in bed!” said the doctor-in-law faintly.

“in bed!” cried the wallypug. “what do you mean?”

“oh! pray forgive us!” cried the doctor-in-law, throwing 184himself on his knees, while the cockatoo hid her face in one claw and rocked herself to and fro, saying over and over again, “what shall we do? what shall we do?”

“get up at once!” said the wallypug, “and tell me what you mean. why are the people in bed?”

“because of the taxes,” groaned the doctor-in-law.

“what do you mean? explain yourself!” demanded the wallypug.

“we taxed them one and ninepence three farthings a day for getting up!” faltered the doctor-in-law, “and, now that the other taxes are so heavy, nobody has any money left, and so they are obliged to stop in bed.”

the wallypug looked very angry. “where is the town crier?” he asked at length.

“in prison,” answered the doctor-in-law, turning pale.

“what for, pray?” cried the wallypug.

“taxes,” moaned the doctor-in-law.

the wallypug frowned and, walking over to the other side of the room, pulled the bell rope violently.

the cockatoo began to sob and the doctor-in-law threw himself down on his knees again.

“the servants have all gone away,” he said tremblingly.

“gone away! where to?” cried the wallypug in surprise.

185“prison,” said the doctor-in-law, beginning to sob.

“do you mean to tell me,” said the wallypug indignantly, “that they have gone to prison for taxes, too?”

“yes,” faltered the doctor-in-law. “you may as well know, at once, that everybody, except the cockatoo and myself, is either in prison or in bed because no one has any more money left to pay taxes with.”

the wallypug stamped his foot impatiently. “go and bring the town crier to me at once,” he said.

and the doctor-in-law got up from his knees and hurried out of the room.

“shall i go, too?” asked the cockatoo meekly.

“stop where you are!” shouted the wallypug. “well, this is a pretty state of affairs,” he continued, addressing himself to girlie and the royal microscopist. “i wonder what would have happened, if we had not returned when we did. oh! here comes the town crier!” he exclaimed a few minutes later, when the doctor-in-law and he entered the room both panting heavily and looking as though they had been running very quickly.

“go at once and proclaim that i have returned, that all the taxes are abolished, that there will be a meeting in the public hall at five o’clock, and that all the people of why are expected to attend it,” said the wallypug.

186the town crier bowed respectfully. “certainly, sir,” he said, “and i should like to say, sir, that i am very glad to see you back. we have been getting on very badly without you.”

“thank you,” said the wallypug quietly. “now go and issue the proclamation. as for you two,” he cried, turning to the doctor-in-law and the cockatoo, who were trembling violently, “you shall be locked up in separate rooms till the public meeting is over and i know what is to be done to you.”

after locking them up, the wallypug sent for a list of all the people who had been imprisoned for not paying their taxes. girlie was greatly surprised to see that the king’s minstrel’s name appeared amongst the rest.

“why, he told me that he was enormously rich!” she said to the royal microscopist, when the wallypug had gone out of the room to sign the pardons.

“nonsense! he was always as poor as a church mouse!” declared the royal microscopist. “he would tell you anything, if he thought that you would believe it. his statements, my dear, are like walnuts; they are improved very greatly by being taken with a grain of salt.”

“then he isn’t engaged to the wallypug’s niece, either, i suppose?” said girlie.

187“why, the wallypug never had a niece, my dear, so i don’t see how that could be!” laughed the royal microscopist. “he only says things of that sort to try to appear grand, but i should think that his pride has had a fall this time, anyhow!”

and it turned out afterwards that the king’s minstrel had really been so much upset at the overthrow of all his grand boastings that as soon as he was released he had left the country in disgust, missed by a very few and regretted by none.

after they had enjoyed some refreshments (which the royal servants prepared for them as soon as they had been liberated from prison) it was time for them to go to the public meeting, and, when the wallypug, followed by girlie and the royal microscopist, entered the hall by the door near the throne, the entire company rose to their feet and cheered over and over again.

the wallypug looked highly pleased at this reception, and bowed repeatedly and then, motioning girlie to a seat which had been placed for her on the dais beside him, he ascended the throne amidst more cheering.

when the confusion had somewhat subsided and the people had resumed their seats, girlie could see that all of her old friends were present, including the fish (who 188seemed somewhat better) the calf, the seals, and the crocodile. madame penguin smiled pleasantly at her from her old seat near the door, and even the porter and the station-master were there.

they had a prolonged meeting, and it was eventually decided that the wallypug was to be for ever excused from addressing his subjects as “your majesty,” and that he was to have entire control of his own property and personal affairs, while the people were still to make their own laws and govern themselves. the money which had been wrongfully collected for taxes was all to be restored, and the doctor-in-law and the cockatoo were to be punished by not being allowed to attend any of the public meetings in future, nor to have any voice whatever in the affairs of the nation.

before the meeting was over, the husher formally asked the wallypug for his permission to propose to one of his sisters, and caused some little amusement by not being able to remember which one it was that he was in love with. he at last decided, however, that it must be belinda. the wallypug willingly gave his consent, and the meeting then dispersed, and girlie followed the wallypug into the palace again, the royal microscopist and the husher being invited to join them.

189

“pushing it open, she walked through.”

190they found belinda and lucinda waiting for them in the amber drawing-room, they having returned from the crocodile’s, where they had been lodging. they seemed greatly pleased to see the wallypug again, and were most gracious to girlie, calling her “dear” and making quite a fuss of her.

the royal microscopist seemed to be very particular in his attentions to lucinda, and girlie thought that she should not be at all surprised if they made a match of it, too. at belinda’s request, she followed the sisters upstairs, when they went to dress for dinner, and, while they were walking along the corridor, lucinda pointed out to her a door with the words “girlie’s room,” written over it.

pushing it open, she walked through, when the door immediately closed again and girlie found herself, to her great surprise—where do you think? i am sure you will never guess.

why, in her own little play-room at home. the door by which she had entered had entirely disappeared and ellen was just entering by the usual door with the teatray.

191“why, miss girlie,” she said when she came in, “how quiet you have been all the afternoon. you must have been fast asleep.”

“i’m sure i haven’t!” cried girlie indignantly, rubbing her eyes, though, and staring about her rather confusedly. “i’ve been having the most lovely adventure!”

to be sure dumpsey deazil was still lying on the domino box and, on looking more closely at boy’s letter, which girlie found herself holding in her hand, she saw that the word she had taken to be “goo” was really “good,” the d being on the next page, boy not being at all particular as to how he divided his words; the whole sentence read—“i have found a good many shells.”

still, girlie was only half convinced, for were not the fishes in her little aquarium all apparently saying o-o-o-b, o-o-o-b, just as the fish with a cold had done, and, outside in the park, could she not see several crows stalking about under the trees looking as though they might be searching for the goo which they hoped would turn out to be a large worm?

“had she been asleep or not?” that was the question; 192she couldn’t decide at all, but, after a little while, she went up to ellen, who was arranging the tea-table, and said,—

“ellen, i’m very sorry that i contradicted you so rudely just now, for—for perhaps i may have been to sleep after all, you know.”

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