i.
“good form” is especially a society phrase, but it is full of meaning, such as has a direct bearing on even the life and walk of a missionary. it is of sufficient importance to engage the attention of any who would become cultured, and is practical and simple enough to become a subject of study in the most common, isolated home, in which children are growing up.
it is in good and bad form that is found a large share of all that difference which distinguishes the lady or gentleman from the slattern and the boor; and in the consideration given to this question of manners it is once again true that “the children of this world are wiser than the children of light.” luke 16:8.
4
one of the first efforts that men or women will make if they have an “ax to grind,” or “something to borrow,” will be to appear well. if they have anything “to push,” an advantage to secure, which makes it necessary that some influential people shall be “won over” to some certain way of thinking, they will study every movement, turn, and word; learn tact, self-control, or anything else by which they can hope to succeed.
many a man has practised facial expression for hours before a mirror, not for amusement, but for business; to the end that he might tone down or eradicate certain lines which would make an unfavorable impression upon those whom he met, and has carefully cultivated in their place those that would be sure to give him a better introduction among those whom he intended to use to his own profit or pleasure. this is constantly done in the interests of self, and has often resulted in forwarding those mercenary 5 and sometimes criminal ends for which it was designed.
for the same purpose men learn grace of carriage,—how to enter and leave a room, how to moderate every tone; and practise laboriously in private, to fix as habit anything which they believe to be desirable, and eradicate anything that would be a hindrance, so that they may never be taken off guard by any rush of feeling, and so jeopardize the selfish interests which are at stake.
for the same end little children are put into training of the most exacting sort, and grow up almost perfect copies of some great master in certain forms which, while in themselves empty, yet are like buckets, capable of holding anything. and until christians are willing to labor as faithfully to become winsome themselves, and train their children to do the best of all work in the best of all forms, they have not yet come to love the truth as the world loves self.
6
the truth is to be carried to all people, high and low. a boor, who loves the truth, and who is filled with the holy spirit, may do a good work in some lines. if he has had no opportunities to know how to carry himself among men, except such knowledge as comes by being a christian, god will keep him where he can be used, and will use him to his glory, and give him sheaves to bring home at last.
“be a christian” is an easy answer to the question, “how shall i conduct myself in such and such a case?” but a man may be a christian, and yet, for the lack of some specific instruction in certain forms of procedure, perpetrate a blunder which will bring the laugh from the profane whom he wished to arouse to sober thought; or make a mistake, such as will carry and widely scatter a serious misunderstanding by which christ will be reproached and his work hindered.
7
i am confident that in every home among all good christian people there is a genuine desire to attain to the best training in everything that will make this best of all work go swiftly to the ends of the earth; but i am also sure that many have failed to appreciate that “the cause” has a right to be carried by the most perfect methods to which it is possible to attain. the truth is worthy of the best of all “good form” in home, church, and social life. good form does not consist so much in putting on, as in putting off—keeping off—those things in deportment, speech, and association which are especially ungraceful, unwinsome, incorrect, and improper.
social good form, although it seems to be of the world, worldly, represents just what christ would do if he were living among men and women in ordinary social relations. the world has taken the best that worldly wisdom can comprehend of the christ-life, 8 and carefully embodied it in a certain code to which it professes to hold itself; to which it does hold itself in public, whatever it may do behind the scenes.
it is manifestly true that the man who has the mind of christ ought to grow, apple-tree fashion, as much of courtesy, gentleness, and all that goes to make an agreeable appearance, as the world can possibly buy in the market of good manners, tie on and wear, christmas-tree fashion.
it is by his first appearance that the colporteur will open or close a door to the truth which he carries in a book, or in samples of health food. his manner in the homes where he is entertained, in public, on the train, the street, at camp-meeting, or on the platform, will close or open the hearts of even the hungry to the spiritual food which the minister is sent forth to serve in the master’s name. the manner of those who occupy the field will play no insignificant 9 part in the work of building up the school, the college, the mission, and in reaching the uttermost parts with the gospel; and since the children now under training in the homes of christian workers must have a share in the work of god in this time when it means more than it ever did for the servants of god to carry weights and hindrances, it seems a good thing to take up the consideration of what constitutes “good form,” or practical christian conduct.
i have had my attention called to this subject by questions from young people, as well as parents; and this message concerning how to meet people and handle the things of this mundane sphere is to both parent and child, boys, girls, and young people, who are preparing for earnest work in the world.