in the meantime, while ladies are luncheoning on perigord pie, or coursing in whirling britskas, performing all the singular ceremonies of a london morning in the heart of the season; making visits where nobody is seen, and making purchases which are not wanted; the world is in agitation and uproar. at present the world and the confusion are limited to st. james’s street and pall mall; but soon the boundaries and the tumult will be extended to the intended metropolitan boroughs; to-morrow they will spread over the manufacturing districts. it is perfectly evident, that before eight-and-forty hours have passed, the country will be in a state of fearful crisis. and how can it be otherwise? is it not a truth that the subtle chief baron has been closeted one whole hour with the king; that shortly after, with thoughtful brow and compressed lip, he was marked in his daring chariot entering the courtyard of apsley house? great was the panic at brookes’, wild the hopes of carlton terrace; all the gentlemen who expected to have been made peers perceived that the country was going to be given over to a rapacious oligarchy.
in the meantime tadpole and taper, who had never quitted for an instant the mysterious head-quarters of the late opposition, were full of hopes and fears, and asked many questions, which they chiefly answered themselves.
‘i wonder what lord lyndhurst will say to the king,’ said taper.
‘he has plenty of pluck,’ said tadpole.
‘i almost wish now that rigby had breakfasted with him this morning,’ said taper.
‘if the king be firm, and the country sound,’ said tadpole, ‘and lord monmouth keep his boroughs, i should not wonder to see rigby made a privy councillor.’
‘there is no precedent for an under-secretary being a privy councillor,’ said taper.
‘but we live in revolutionary times,’ said tadpole.
‘gentlemen,’ said the groom of the chambers, in a loud voice, entering the room, ‘i am desired to state that the duke of wellington is with the king.’
‘there is a providence!’ exclaimed an agitated gentleman, the patent of whose intended peerage had not been signed the day that the duke had quited office in 1830.
‘i always thought the king would be firm,’ said mr. tadpole.
‘i wonder who will have the india board,’ said taper.
at this moment three or four gentlemen entered the room in a state of great bustle and excitement; they were immediately surrounded.
‘is it true?’ ‘quite true; not the slightest doubt. saw him myself. not at all hissed; certainly not hooted. perhaps a little hissed. one fellow really cheered him. saw him myself. say what they like, there is reaction.’ ‘but constitution hill, they say?’ ‘well, there was a sort of inclination to a row on constitution hill; but the duke quite firm; pistols, and carriage doors bolted.’
such may give a faint idea of the anxious inquiries and the satisfactory replies that were occasioned by the entrance of this group.
‘up, guards, and at them!’ exclaimed tadpole, rubbing his hands in a fit of patriotic enthusiasm.
later in the afternoon, about five o’clock, the high change of political gossip, when the room was crowded, and every one had his rumour, mr. rigby looked in again to throw his eye over the evening papers, and catch in various chit-chat the tone of public or party feeling on the ‘crisis.’ then it was known that the duke had returned from the king, having accepted the charge of forming an administration. an administration to do what? portentous question! were concessions to be made? and if so, what? was it altogether impossible, and too late, ‘stare super vias antiquas?’ questions altogether above your tadpoles and your tapers, whose idea of the necessities of the age was that they themselves should be in office.
lord eskdale came up to mr. rigby. this peer was a noble croesus, acquainted with all the gradations of life; a voluptuary who could be a spartan; clear-sighted, unprejudiced, sagacious; the best judge in the world of a horse or a man; he was the universal referee; a quarrel about a bet or a mistress was solved by him in a moment, and in a manner which satisfied both parties. he patronised and appreciated the fine arts, though a jockey; respected literary men, though he only read french novels; and without any affectation of tastes which he did not possess, was looked upon by every singer and dancer in europe as their natural champion. the secret of his strong character and great influence was his self-composure, which an earthquake or a reform bill could not disturb, and which in him was the result of temperament and experience. he was an intimate acquaintance of lord monmouth, for they had many tastes in common; were both men of considerable, and in some degree similar abilities; and were the two greatest proprietors of close boroughs in the country.
‘do you dine at monmouth house to-day?’ inquired lord eskdale of mr. rigby.
‘where i hope to meet your lordship. the whig papers are very subdued,’ continued mr. rigby.
‘ah! they have not the cue yet,’ said lord eskdale.
‘and what do you think of affairs?’ inquired his companion.
‘i think the hounds are too hot to hark off now,’ said lord eskdale.
‘there is one combination,’ said rigby, who seemed meditating an attack on lord eskdale’s button.
‘give it us at dinner,’ said lord eskdale, who knew his man, and made an adroit movement forwards, as if he were very anxious to see the globe newspaper.
in the course of two or three hours these gentlemen met again in the green drawing-room of monmouth house. mr. rigby was sitting on a sofa by lord monmouth, detailing in whispers all his gossip of the morn: lord eskdale murmuring quaint inquiries into the ear of the princess lucretia.
madame colonna made remarks alternately to two gentlemen, who paid her assiduous court. one of these was mr. ormsby; the school, the college, and the club crony of lord monmouth, who had been his shadow through life; travelled with him in early days, won money with him at play, had been his colleague in the house of commons; and was still one of his nominees. mr. ormsby was a millionaire, which lord monmouth liked. he liked his companions to be very rich or very poor; be his equals, able to play with him at high stakes, or join him in a great speculation; or to be his tools, and to amuse and serve him. there was nothing which he despised and disliked so much as a moderate fortune.
the other gentleman was of a different class and character. nature had intended lucian gay for a scholar and a wit; necessity had made him a scribbler and a buffoon. he had distinguished himself at the university; but he had no patrimony, nor those powers of perseverance which success in any learned profession requires. he was good-looking, had great animal spirits, and a keen sense of enjoyment, and could not drudge. moreover he had a fine voice, and sang his own songs with considerable taste; accomplishments which made his fortune in society and completed his ruin. in due time he extricated himself from the bench and merged into journalism, by means of which he chanced to become acquainted with mr. rigby. that worthy individual was not slow in detecting the treasure he had lighted on; a wit, a ready and happy writer, a joyous and tractable being, with the education, and still the feelings and manners, of a gentleman. frequent were the sunday dinners which found gay a guest at mr. rigby’s villa; numerous the airy pasquinades which he left behind, and which made the fortune of his patron. flattered by the familiar acquaintance of a man of station, and sanguine that he had found the link which would sooner or later restore him to the polished world that he had forfeited, gay laboured in his vocation with enthusiasm and success. willingly would rigby have kept his treasure to himself; and truly he hoarded it for a long time, but it oozed out. rigby loved the reputation of possessing the complete art of society. his dinners were celebrated at least for their guests. great intellectual illustrations were found there blended with rank and high station. rigby loved to patronise; to play the minister unbending and seeking relief from the cares of council in the society of authors, artists, and men of science. he liked dukes to dine with him and hear him scatter his audacious criticisms to sir thomas or sir humphry. they went away astounded by the powers of their host, who, had he not fortunately devoted those powers to their party, must apparently have rivalled vandyke, or discovered the safety-lamp.
now in these dinners, lucian gay, who had brilliant conversational powers, and who possessed all the resources of boon companionship, would be an invaluable ally. he was therefore admitted, and inspired both by the present enjoyment, and the future to which it might lead, his exertions were untiring, various, most successful. rigby’s dinners became still, more celebrated. it, however, necessarily followed that the guests who were charmed by gay, wished gay also to be their guest. rigby was very jealous of this, but it was inevitable; still by constant manoeuvre, by intimations of some exercise, some day or other, of substantial patronage in his behalf, by a thousand little arts by which he carved out work for gay which often prevented him accepting invitations to great houses in the country, by judicious loans of small sums on lucian’s notes of hand and other analogous devices, rigby contrived to keep the wit in a fair state of bondage and dependence.
one thing rigby was resolved on: gay should never get into monmouth house. that was an empyrean too high for his wing to soar in. rigby kept that social monopoly distinctively to mark the relation that subsisted between them as patron and client. it was something to swagger about when they were together after their second bottle of claret. rigby kept his resolution for some years, which the frequent and prolonged absence of the marquess rendered not very difficult. but we are the creatures of circumstances; at least the rigby race particularly. lord monmouth returned to england one year, and wanted to be amused. he wanted a jester: a man about him who would make him, not laugh, for that was impossible, but smile more frequently, tell good stories, say good things, and sing now and then, especially french songs. early in life rigby would have attempted all this, though he had neither fun, voice, nor ear. but his hold on lord monmouth no longer depended on the mere exercise of agreeable qualities, he had become indispensable to his lordship, by more serious if not higher considerations. and what with auditing his accounts, guarding his boroughs, writing him, when absent, gossip by every post and when in england deciding on every question and arranging every matter which might otherwise have ruffled the sublime repose of his patron’s existence, rigby might be excused if he shrank a little from the minor part of table wit, particularly when we remember all his subterranean journalism, his acid squibs, and his malicious paragraphs, and, what tadpole called, his ‘slashing articles.’
these ‘slashing articles’ were, indeed, things which, had they appeared as anonymous pamphlets, would have obtained the contemptuous reception which in an intellectual view no compositions more surely deserved; but whispered as the productions of one behind the scenes, and appearing in the pages of a party review, they were passed off as genuine coin, and took in great numbers of the lieges, especially in the country. they were written in a style apparently modelled on the briefs of those sharp attorneys who weary advocates with their clever commonplace; teasing with obvious comment, and torturing with inevitable inference. the affectation of order in the statement of facts had all the lucid method of an adroit pettifogger. they dealt much in extracts from newspapers, quotations from the annual register, parallel passages in forgotten speeches, arranged with a formidable array of dates rarely accurate. when the writer was of opinion he had made a point, you may be sure the hit was in italics, that last resource of the forcible feebles. he handled a particular in chronology as if he were proving an alibi at the criminal court. the censure was coarse without being strong, and vindictive when it would have been sarcastic. now and then there was a passage which aimed at a higher flight, and nothing can be conceived more unlike genuine feeling, or more offensive to pure taste. and yet, perhaps, the most ludicrous characteristic of these facetious gallimaufreys was an occasional assumption of the high moral and admonitory tone, which when we recurred to the general spirit of the discourse, and were apt to recall the character of its writer, irresistibly reminded one of mrs. cole and her prayer-book.
to return to lucian gay. it was a rule with rigby that no one, if possible, should do anything for lord monmouth but himself; and as a jester must be found, he was determined that his lordship should have the best in the market, and that he should have the credit of furnishing the article. as a reward, therefore, for many past services, and a fresh claim to his future exertions, rigby one day broke to gay that the hour had at length arrived when the highest object of reasonable ambition on his part, and the fulfilment of one of rigby’s long-cherished and dearest hopes, were alike to be realised. gay was to be presented to lord monmouth and dine at monmouth house.
the acquaintance was a successful one; very agreeable to both parties. gay became an habitual guest of lord monmouth when his patron was in england; and in his absence received frequent and substantial marks of his kind recollection, for lord monmouth was generous to those who amused him.
in the meantime the hour of dinner is at hand. coningsby, who had lost the key of his carpet-bag, which he finally cut open with a penknife that he found on his writing-table, and the blade of which he broke in the operation, only reached the drawing-room as the figure of his grandfather, leaning on his ivory cane, and following his guests, was just visible in the distance. he was soon overtaken. perceiving coningsby, lord monmouth made him a bow, not so formal a one as in the morning, but still a bow, and said, ‘i hope you liked your drive.’
