dearest daddy-long-legs,
yes, certainly i'll come--at half-past four next wednesday afternoon.
of course i can find the way. i've been in new york three times and am
not quite a baby. i can't believe that i am really going to see you--
i've been just thinking you so long that it hardly seems as though
you are a tangible flesh-and-blood person.
you are awfully good, daddy, to bother yourself with me, when you're
not strong. take care and don't catch cold. these fall rains
are very damp.
affectionately,
judy
ps. i've just had an awful thought. have you a butler? i'm afraid
of butlers, and if one opens the door i shall faint upon the step.
what can i say to him? you didn't tell me your name. shall i ask
for mr. smith?
thursday morning
my very dearest master-jervie-daddy-long-legs pendleton-smith,
did you sleep last night? i didn't. not a single wink. i was
too amazed and excited and bewildered and happy. i don't believe
i ever shall sleep again--or eat either. but i hope you slept;
you must, you know, because then you will get well faster and can
come to me.
dear man, i can't bear to think how ill you've been--and all the
time i never knew it. when the doctor came down yesterday to put
me in the cab, he told me that for three days they gave you up.
oh, dearest, if that had happened, the light would have gone out
of the world for me. i suppose that some day in the far future--
one of us must leave the other; but at least we shall have had
our happiness and there will be memories to live with.
i meant to cheer you up--and instead i have to cheer myself.
for in spite of being happier than i ever dreamed i could be,
i'm also soberer. the fear that something may happen rests like
a shadow on my heart. always before i could be frivolous and
care-free and unconcerned, because i had nothing precious to lose.
but now--i shall have a great big worry all the rest of my life.
whenever you are away from me i shall be thinking of all the automobiles
that can run over you, or the sign-boards that can fall on your head,
or the dreadful, squirmy germs that you may be swallowing. my peace
of mind is gone for ever--but anyway, i never cared much for just
plain peace.
please get well--fast--fast--fast. i want to have you close
by where i can touch you and make sure you are tangible. such a
little half hour we had together! i'm afraid maybe i dreamed it.
if i were only a member of your family (a very distant fourth cousin)
then i could come and visit you every day, and read aloud and plump up
your pillow and smooth out those two little wrinkles in your forehead
and make the corners of your mouth turn up in a nice cheerful smile.
but you are cheerful again, aren't you? you were yesterday before
i left. the doctor said i must be a good nurse, that you looked
ten years younger. i hope that being in love doesn't make every
one ten years younger. will you still care for me, darling, if i
turn out to be only eleven?
yesterday was the most wonderful day that could ever happen.
if i live to be ninety-nine i shall never forget the tiniest detail.
the girl that left lock willow at dawn was a very different person from
the one who came back at night. mrs. semple called me at half-past four.
i started wide awake in the darkness and the first thought that
popped into my head was, `i am going to see daddy-long-legs!' i ate
breakfast in the kitchen by candle-light, and then drove the five
miles to the station through the most glorious october colouring.
the sun came up on the way, and the swamp maples and dogwood glowed
crimson and orange and the stone walls and cornfields sparkled
with hoar frost; the air was keen and clear and full of promise.
i knew something was going to happen. all the way in the train
the rails kept singing, `you're going to see daddy-long-legs.'
it made me feel secure. i had such faith in daddy's ability to set
things right. and i knew that somewhere another man--dearer than daddy--
was wanting to see me, and somehow i had a feeling that before the
journey ended i should meet him, too. and you see!
when i came to the house on madison avenue it looked so big and brown
and forbidding that i didn't dare go in, so i walked around the
block to get up my courage. but i needn't have been a bit afraid;
your butler is such a nice, fatherly old man that he made me
feel at home at once. `is this miss abbott?' he said to me,
and i said, `yes,' so i didn't have to ask for mr. smith after all.
he told me to wait in the drawing-room. it was a very sombre,
magnificent, man's sort of room. i sat down on the edge of a big
upholstered chair and kept saying to myself:
`i'm going to see daddy-long-legs! i'm going to see daddy-long-legs!'
then presently the man came back and asked me please to step up
to the library. i was so excited that really and truly my feet
would hardly take me up. outside the door he turned and whispered,
`he's been very ill, miss. this is the first day he's been
allowed to sit up. you'll not stay long enough to excite him?'
i knew from the way he said it that he loved you--an i think he's
an old dear!
then he knocked and said, `miss abbott,' and i went in and the door
closed behind me.
it was so dim coming in from the brightly lighted hall that for a
moment i could scarcely make out anything; then i saw a big easy
chair before the fire and a shining tea table with a smaller chair
beside it. and i realized that a man was sitting in the big chair
propped up by pillows with a rug over his knees. before i could
stop him he rose--rather shakily--and steadied himself by the back
of the chair and just looked at me without a word. and then--
and then--i saw it was you! but even with that i didn't understand.
i thought daddy had had you come there to meet me or a surprise.
then you laughed and held out your hand and said, `dear little judy,
couldn't you guess that i was daddy-long-legs?'
in an instant it flashed over me. oh, but i have been stupid!
a hundred little things might have told me, if i had had any wits.
i wouldn't make a very good detective, would i, daddy? jervie?
what must i call you? just plain jervie sounds disrespectful, and i
can't be disrespectful to you!
it was a very sweet half hour before your doctor came and sent me away.
i was so dazed when i got to the station that i almost took a train
for st louis. and you were pretty dazed, too. you forgot to give
me any tea. but we're both very, very happy, aren't we? i drove
back to lock willow in the dark but oh, how the stars were shining!
and this morning i've been out with colin visiting all the places
that you and i went to together, and remembering what you said and
how you looked. the woods today are burnished bronze and the air
is full of frost. it's climbing weather. i wish you were here to
climb the hills with me. i am missing you dreadfully, jervie dear,
but it's a happy kind of missing; we'll be together soon. we belong
to each other now really and truly, no make-believe. doesn't it
seem queer for me to belong to someone at last? it seems very,
very sweet.
and i shall never let you be sorry for a single instant.
yours, for ever and ever,
judy
ps. this is the first love-letter i ever wrote. isn't it funny
that i know how?