“i knew it was a duel — bedad i did,” said laurence fitzgibbon, standing at the corner of orchard street and oxford street, when phineas had half told his story. “i was sure of it from the tone of your voice, my boy. we mustn’t let it come off that’s all — not if we can help it.” then phineas was allowed to proceed and finish his story. “i don’t see any way out of it; i don’t, indeed,” said laurence. by this time phineas had come to think that the duel was in very truth the best way out of the difficulty. it was a bad way out, but then it was a way — and he could not see any other. “as for ill-treating him, that’s nonsense,” said laurence. “what are the girls to do, if one fellow mayn’t come on as soon as another fellow is down? but then, you see, a fellow never knows when he’s down himself, and therefore he thinks that he’s ill-used. i’ll tell you what now. i shouldn’t wonder if we couldn’t do it on the sly — unless one of you is stupid enough to hit the other in an awkward place. if you are certain of your hand now, the right shoulder is the best spot.” phineas felt very certain that he would not hit lord chiltern in an awkward place, although he was by no means sure of his hand. let come what might, he would not aim at his adversary. but of this he had thought it proper to say nothing to laurence fitzgibbon.
and the duel did come off on the sly. the meeting in the drawing-room in portman square, of which mention was made in the last chapter, took place on a wednesday afternoon. on the thursday, friday, monday, and tuesday following, the great debate on mr mildmay’s bill was continued, and at three on the tuesday night the house divided. there was a majority in favour of the ministers, not large enough to permit them to claim a triumph for their party, or even an ovation for themselves; but still sufficient to enable them to send their bill into committee. mr daubeny and mr turnbull had again joined their forces together in opposition to the ministerial measure. on the thursday phineas had shown himself in the house, but during the remainder of this interesting period he was absent from his place, nor was he seen at the clubs, nor did any man know of his whereabouts. i think that lady laura kennedy was the first to miss him with any real sense of his absence. she would now go to portman square on the afternoon of every sunday — at which time her husband was attending the second service of his church — and there she would receive those whom she called her father’s guests. but as her father was never there on the sundays, and as these gatherings had been created by herself, the reader will probably think that she was obeying her husband’s behests in regard to the sabbath after a very indifferent fashion. the reader may be quite sure, however, that mr kennedy knew well what was being done in portman square. whatever might be lady laura’s faults, she did not commit the fault of disobeying her husband in secret. there were, probably, a few words on the subject; but we need not go very closely into that matter at the present moment.
on the sunday which afforded some rest in the middle of the great reform debate lady laura asked for mr finn, and no one could answer her question. and then it was remembered that laurence fitzgibbon was also absent. barrington erle knew nothing of phineas — had heard nothing; but was able to say that fitzgibbon had been with mr ratler, the patronage secretary and liberal whip, early on thursday, expressing his intention of absenting himself for two days. mr ratler had been wroth, bidding him remain at his duty, and pointing out to him the great importance of the moment. then barrington erle quoted laurence fitzgibbon’s reply. “my boy,” said laurence to poor ratler, “the path of duty leads but to the grave. all the same; i’ll be in at the death, ratler, my boy, as sure as the sun’s in heaven.” not ten minutes after the telling of this little story, fitzgibbon entered the room in portman square, and lady laura at once asked him after phineas. “bedad, lady laura, i have been out of town myself for two days, and i know nothing.”
“mr finn has not been with you, then?”
“with me! no — not with me. i had a job of business of my own which took me over to paris. and has phinny fled too? poor ratler! i shouldn’t wonder if it isn’t an asylum he’s in before the session is over.”
laurence fitzgibbon certainly possessed the rare accomplishment of telling a lie with a good grace. had any man called him a liar he would have considered himself to be not only insulted, but injured also. he believed himself to be a man of truth. there were, however, in his estimation certain subjects on which a man might depart as wide as the poles are asunder from truth without subjecting himself to any ignominy for falsehood. in dealing with a tradesman as to his debts, or with a rival as to a lady, or with any man or woman in defence of a lady’s character, or in any such matter as that of a duel, laurence believed that a gentleman was bound to lie, and that he would be no gentleman if he hesitated to do so. not the slightest prick of conscience disturbed him when he told lady laura that he had been in paris, and that he knew nothing of phineas finn. but, in truth, during the last day or two he had been in flanders, and not in paris, and had stood as second with his friend phineas on the sands at blankenberg, a little fishing town some twelve miles distant from bruges, and had left his friend since that at an hotel at ostend — with a wound just under the shoulder, from which a bullet had been extracted.
the manner of the meeting had been in this wise. captain colepepper and laurence fitzgibbon had held their meeting, and at this meeting laurence had taken certain standing-ground on behalf of his friend, and in obedience to his friend’s positive instruction — which was this, that his friend could not abandon his right of addressing the young lady, should he hereafter ever think fit to do so. let that be granted, and laurence would do anything. but then that could not be granted, and laurence could only shrug his shoulders. nor would laurence admit that his friend had been false. “the question lies in a nutshell,” said laurence, with that sweet connaught brogue which always came to him when he desired to be effective — “here it is. one gentleman tells another that he’s sweet upon a young lady, but that the young lady has refused him, and always will refuse him, for ever and ever. that’s the truth anyhow. is the second gentleman bound by that not to address the young lady? i say he is not bound. it’d be a d — d hard tratement, captain colepepper, if a man’s mouth and all the ardent affections of his heart were to be stopped in that manner! by jases, i don’t know who’d like to be the friend of any man if that’s to be the way of it.”
captain colepepper was not very good at an argument. “i think they’d better see each other,” said colepepper, pulling his thick grey moustache.
“if you choose to have it so, so be it. but i think it the hardest thing in the world — i do indeed.” then they put their heads together in the most friendly way, and declared that the affair should, if possible, be kept private.
on the thursday night lord chiltern and captain colepepper went over by calais and lille to bruges. laurence fitzgibbon, with his friend dr o’shaughnessy, crossed by the direct boat from dover to ostend. phineas went to ostend by dover and calais, but he took the day route on friday. it had all been arranged among them, so that there might be no suspicion as to the job in hand. even o’shaughnessy and laurence fitzgibbon had left london by separate trains. they met on the sands at blankenberg about nine o’clock on the saturday morning, having reached that village in different vehicles from ostend and bruges, and had met quite unobserved amidst the sand-heaps. but one shot had been exchanged, and phineas had been wounded in the right shoulder. he had proposed to exchange another shot with his left hand, declaring his capability of shooting quite as well with the left as with the right; but to this both colepepper and fitzgibbon had objected. lord chiltern had offered to shake hands with his late friend in a true spirit of friendship, if only his late friend would say that he did not intend to prosecute his suit with the young lady. in all these disputes the young lady’s name was never mentioned. phineas indeed had not once named violet to fitzgibbon, speaking of her always as the lady in question; and though laurence correctly surmised the identity of the young lady, he never hinted that he had even guessed her name. i doubt whether lord chiltern had been so wary when alone with captain colepepper; but then lord chiltern was, when he spoke at all, a very plain-spoken man. of course his lordship’s late friend phineas would give no such pledge, and therefore lord chiltern moved off the ground and back to blankenberg and bruges, and into brussels, in still living enmity with our hero. laurence and the doctor took phineas back to ostend, and though the bullet was then in his shoulder, phineas made his way through blankenberg after such a fashion that no one there knew what had occurred. not a living soul, except the five concerned, was at that time aware that a duel had been fought among the sand-hills.
laurence fitzgibbon made his way to dover by the saturday night’s boat, and was able to show himself in portman square on the sunday. “know anything about phinny finn?” he said afterwards to barrington erle, in answer to an inquiry from that anxious gentleman. “not a word! i think you’d better send the towncrier round after him.” barrington, however, did not feel quite so well assured of fitzgibbon’s truth as lady laura had done.
dr o’shaughnessy remained during the sunday and monday at ostend with his patient, and the people at the inn only knew that mr finn had sprained his shoulder badly; and on the tuesday they came back to london again, via calais and dover. no bone had been broken, and phineas, though his shoulder was very painful, bore the journey well. o’shaughnessy had received a telegram on the monday, telling him that the division would certainly take place on the tuesday — and on the tuesday, at about ten in the evening, phineas went down to the house. “by — you’re here,” said ratler, taking hold of him with an affection that was too warm. “yes; i’m here,” said phineas, wincing in agony; “but be a little careful, there’s a good fellow. i’ve been down in kent and put my arm out.”
“put your arm out, have you?” said ratler, observing the sling for the first time. “i’m sorry for that. but you’ll stop and vote?”
“yes — i’ll stop and vote. i’ve come up for the purpose, but i hope it won’t be very late.”
“there are both daubeny and gresham to speak yet, and at least three others. i don’t suppose it will be much before three. but you’re all right now. you can go down and smoke if you like!” in this way phineas finn spoke in the debate, and heard the end of it, voting for his party, and fought his duel with lord chiltern in the middle of it.
he did go and sit on a well-cushioned bench in the smoking-room, and then was interrogated by many of his friends as to his mysterious absence. he had, he said, been down in kent, and had had an accident with his arm, by which he had been confined. when this questioner and that perceived that there was some little mystery in the matter, the questioners did not push their questions, but simply entertained their own surmises. one indiscreet questioner, however, did trouble phineas sorely, declaring that there must have been some affair in which a woman had had a part, and asking after the young lady of kent. this indiscreet questioner was laurence fitzgibbon, who, as phineas thought, carried his spirit of intrigue a little too far. phineas stayed and voted, and then he went painfully home to his lodgings.
how singular would it be if this affair of the duel should pass away, and no one be a bit the wiser but those four men who had been with him on the sands at blankenberg! again he wondered at his own luck. he had told himself that a duel with lord chiltern must create a quarrel between him and lord chiltern’s relations, and also between him and violet effingham; that it must banish him from his comfortable seat for loughton, and ruin him in regard to his political prospects. and now he had fought his duel, and was back in town — and the thing seemed to have been a thing of nothing. he had not as yet seen lady laura or violet, but he had no doubt but they both were as much in the dark as other people. the day might arrive, he thought, on which it would be pleasant for him to tell violet effingham what had occurred, but that day had not come as yet. whither lord chiltern had gone, or what lord chiltern intended to do, he had not any idea; but he imagined that he should soon hear something of her brother from lady laura. that lord chiltern should say a word to lady laura of what had occurred — or to any other person in the world — he did not in the least suspect. there could be no man more likely to be reticent in such matters than lord chiltern — or more sure to be guided by an almost exaggerated sense of what honour required of him. nor did he doubt the discretion of his friend fitzgibbon — if only his friend might not damage the secret by being too discreet. of the silence of the doctor and the captain he was by no means equally sure; but even though they should gossip, the gossiping would take so long a time in oozing out and becoming recognised information, as to have lost much of its power for injuring him. were lady laura to hear at this moment that he had been over to belgium, and had fought a duel with lord chiltern respecting violet, she would probably feel herself obliged to quarrel with him; but no such obligation would rest on her, if in the course of six or nine months she should gradually have become aware that such an encounter had taken place.
lord chiltern, during their interview at the rooms in great marlborough street, had said a word to him about the seat in parliament — had expressed some opinion that as he, phineas finn, was interfering with the views of the standish family in regard to miss effingham, he ought not to keep the standish seat, which had been conferred upon him in ignorance of any such intended interference. phineas, as he thought of this, could not remember lord chiltern’s words, but there was present to him an idea that such had been their purport. was he bound, in circumstances as they now existed, to give up loughton? he made up his mind that he was not so bound unless lord chiltern should demand from him that he should do so; but, nevertheless, he was uneasy in his position. it was quite true that the seat now was his for this session by all parliamentary law, even though the electors themselves might wish to be rid of him, and that lord brentford could not even open his mouth upon the matter in a tone more loud than that of a whisper. but phineas, feeling that he had consented to accept the favour of a corrupt seat from lord brentford, felt also that he was bound to give up the spoil if it were demanded from him. if it were demanded from him, either by the father or the son, it should be given up at once.
on the following morning he found a leading article in the people’s banner devoted solely to himself. “during the late debate,” — so ran a passage in the leading article — “mr finn, lord brentford’s irish nominee for his pocket-borough at loughton, did at last manage to stand on his legs and open his mouth. if we are not mistaken, this is mr finn’s third session in parliament, and hitherto he has been unable to articulate three sentences, though he has on more than one occasion made the attempt. for what special merit this young man has been selected for aristocratic patronage we do not know — but that there must be some merit recognisable by aristocratic eyes, we surmise. three years ago he was a raw young irishman, living in london as irishmen only know how to live, earning nothing, and apparently without means; and then suddenly he bursts out as a member of parliament and as the friend of cabinet ministers. the possession of one good gift must be acceded to the honourable member for loughton — he is a handsome young man, and looks to be as strong as a coal-porter. can it be that his promotion has sprung from this? be this as it may, we should like to know where he has been during his late mysterious absence from parliament, and in what way he came by the wound in his arm. even handsome young members of parliament, fêted by titled ladies and their rich lords, are amenable to the laws — to the laws of this country, and to the laws of any other which it may suit them to visit for a while!”
“infamous scoundrel!” said phineas to himself, as he read this. “vile, low, disreputable blackguard!” it was clear enough, however, that quintus slide had found out something of his secret. if so, his only hope would rest on the fact that his friends were not likely to see the columns of the people’s banner.
