amazing artfulness of captain cuttle, and a new pursuit for walter gay
walter could not, for several days, decide what to do in the barbados business; and even cherished some faint hope that mr dombey might not have meant what he had said, or that he might change his mind, and tell him he was not to go. but as nothing occurred to give this idea (which was sufficiently improbable in itself) any touch of confirmation, and as time was slipping by, and he had none to lose, he felt that he must act, without hesitating any longer.
walter's chief difficulty was, how to break the change in his affairs to uncle sol, to whom he was sensible it would he a terrible blow. he had the greater difficulty in dashing uncle sol's spirits with such an astounding piece of intelligence, because they had lately recovered very much, and the old man had become so cheerful, that the little back parlour was itself again. uncle sol had paid the first appointed portion of the debt to mr dombey, and was hopeful of working his way through the rest; and to cast him down afresh, when he had sprung up so manfully from his troubles, was a very distressing necessity.
yet it would never do to run away from him. he must know of it beforehand; and how to tell him was the point. as to the question of going or not going, walter did not consider that he had any power of choice in the matter. mr dombey had truly told him that he was young, and that his uncle's circumstances were not good; and mr dombey had plainly expressed, in the glance with which he had accompanied that reminder, that if he declined to go he might stay at home if he chose, but not in his counting-house. his uncle and he lay under a great obligation to mr dombey, which was of walter's own soliciting. he might have begun in secret to despair of ever winning that gentleman's favour, and might have thought that he was now and then disposed to put a slight upon him, which was hardly just. but what would have been duty without that, was still duty with it - or walter thought so- and duty must be done.
when mr dombey had looked at him, and told him he was young, and that his uncle's circumstances were not good, there had been an expression of disdain in his face; a contemptuous and disparaging assumption that he would be quite content to live idly on a reduced old man, which stung the boy's generous soul. determined to assure mr dombey, in so far as it was possible to give him the assurance without expressing it in words, that indeed he mistook his nature, walter had been anxious to show even more cheerfulness and activity after the west indian interview than he had shown before: if that were possible, in one of his quick and zealous disposition. he was too young and inexperienced to think, that possibly this very quality in him was not agreeable to mr dombey, and that it was no stepping-stone to his good opinion to be elastic and hopeful of pleasing under the shadow of his powerful displeasure, whether it were right or wrong. but it may have been - it may have been- that the great man thought himself defied in this new exposition of an honest spirit, and purposed to bring it down.
'well! at last and at least, uncle sol must be told,' thought walter, with a sigh. and as walter was apprehensive that his voice might perhaps quaver a little, and that his countenance might not be quite as hopeful as he could wish it to be, if he told the old man himself, and saw the first effects of his communication on his wrinkled face, he resolved to avail himself of the services of that powerful mediator, captain cuttle. sunday coming round, he set off therefore, after breakfast, once more to beat up captain cuttle's quarters.
it was not unpleasant to remember, on the way thither, that mrs macstinger resorted to a great distance every sunday morning, to attend the ministry of the reverend melchisedech howler, who, having been one day discharged from the west india docks on a false suspicion (got up expressly against him by the general enemy) of screwing gimlets into puncheons, and applying his lips to the orifice, had announced the destruction of the world for that day two years, at ten in the morning, and opened a front parlour for the reception of ladies and gentlemen of the ranting persuasion, upon whom, on the first occasion of their assemblage, the admonitions of the reverend melchisedech had produced so powerful an effect, that, in their rapturous performance of a sacred jig, which closed the service, the whole flock broke through into a kitchen below, and disabled a mangle belonging to one of the fold.
this the captain, in a moment of uncommon conviviality, had confided to walter and his uncle, between the repetitions of lovely peg, on the night when brogley the broker was paid out. the captain himself was punctual in his attendance at a church in his own neighbourhood, which hoisted the union jack every sunday morning; and where he was good enough - the lawful beadle being infirm - to keep an eye upon the boys, over whom he exercised great power, in virtue of his mysterious hook. knowing the regularity of the captain's habits, walter made all the haste he could, that he might anticipate his going out; and he made such good speed, that he had the pleasure, on turning into brig place, to behold the broad blue coat and waistcoat hanging out of the captain's open window, to air in the sun.
it appeared incredible that the coat and waistcoat could be seen by mortal eyes without the captain; but he certainly was not in them, otherwise his legs - the houses in brig place not being lofty- would have obstructed the street door, which was perfectly clear. quite wondering at this discovery, walter gave a single knock.
'stinger,' he distinctly heard the captain say, up in his room, as if that were no business of his. therefore walter gave two knocks.
'cuttle,' he heard the captain say upon that; and immediately afterwards the captain, in his clean shirt and braces, with his neckerchief hanging loosely round his throat like a coil of rope, and his glazed hat on, appeared at the window, leaning out over the broad blue coat and waistcoat.
'wal'r!' cried the captain, looking down upon him in amazement.
'ay, ay, captain cuttle,' returned walter, 'only me'
'what's the matter, my lad?' inquired the captain, with great concern. 'gills an't been and sprung nothing again?'
'no, no,' said walter. 'my uncle's all right, captain cuttle.'
the captain expressed his gratification, and said he would come down below and open the door, which he did.
'though you're early, wal'r,' said the captain, eyeing him still doubtfully, when they got upstairs:
'why, the fact is, captain cuttle,' said walter, sitting down, 'i was afraid you would have gone out, and i want to benefit by your friendly counsel.'
'so you shall,' said the captain; 'what'll you take?'
'i want to take your opinion, captain cuttle,' returned walter, smiling. 'that's the only thing for me.'
'come on then,' said the captain. 'with a will, my lad!'
walter related to him what had happened; and the difficulty in which he felt respecting his uncle, and the relief it would be to him if captain cuttle, in his kindness, would help him to smooth it away; captain cuttle's infinite consternation and astonishment at the prospect unfolded to him, gradually swallowing that gentleman up, until it left his face quite vacant, and the suit of blue, the glazed hat, and the hook, apparently without an owner.
'you see, captain cuttle,' pursued walter, 'for myself, i am young, as mr dombey said, and not to be considered. i am to fight my way through the world, i know; but there are two points i was thinking, as i came along, that i should be very particular about, in respect to my uncle. i don't mean to say that i deserve to be the pride and delight of his life - you believe me, i know - but i am. now, don't you think i am?'
the captain seemed to make an endeavour to rise from the depths of his astonishment, and get back to his face; but the effort being ineffectual, the glazed hat merely nodded with a mute, unutterable meaning.
'if i live and have my health,' said walter, 'and i am not afraid of that, still, when i leave england i can hardly hope to see my uncle again. he is old, captain cuttle; and besides, his life is a life of custom - '
'steady, wal'r! of a want of custom?' said the captain, suddenly reappearing.
'too true,' returned walter, shaking his head: 'but i meant a life of habit, captain cuttle - that sort of custom. and if (as you very truly said, i am sure) he would have died the sooner for the loss of the stock, and all those objects to which he has been accustomed for so many years, don't you think he might die a little sooner for the loss of - '
'of his nevy,' interposed the captain. 'right!'
'well then,' said walter, trying to speak gaily, 'we must do our best to make him believe that the separation is but a temporary one, after all; but as i know better, or dread that i know better, captain cuttle, and as i have so many reasons for regarding him with affection, and duty, and honour, i am afraid i should make but a very poor hand at that, if i tried to persuade him of it. that's my great reason for wishing you to break it out to him; and that's the first point.'
'keep her off a point or so!' observed the captain, in a comtemplative voice.
'what did you say, captain cuttle?' inquired walter.
'stand by!' returned the captain, thoughtfully.
walter paused to ascertain if the captain had any particular information to add to this, but as he said no more, went on.
'now, the second point, captain cuttle. i am sorry to say, i am not a favourite with mr dombey. i have always tried to do my best, and i have always done it; but he does not like me. he can't help his likings and dislikings, perhaps. i say nothing of that. i only say that i am certain he does not like me. he does not send me to this post as a good one; he disclaims to represent it as being better than it is; and i doubt very much if it will ever lead me to advancement in the house - whether it does not, on the contrary, dispose of me for ever, and put me out of the way. now, we must say nothing of this to my uncle, captain cuttle, but must make it out to be as favourable and promising as we can; and when i tell you what it really is, i only do so, that in case any means should ever arise of lending me a hand, so far off, i may have one friend at home who knows my real situation.
'wal'r, my boy,' replied the captain, 'in the proverbs of solomon you will find the following words, "may we never want a friend in need, nor a bottle to give him!" when found, make a note of.'
here the captain stretched out his hand to walter, with an air of downright good faith that spoke volumes; at the same time repeating (for he felt proud of the accuracy and pointed application of his quotation), 'when found, make a note of.'
'captain cuttle,' said walter, taking the immense fist extended to him by the captain in both his hands, which it completely filled, next to my uncle sol, i love you. there is no one on earth in whom i can more safely trust, i am sure. as to the mere going away, captain cuttle, i don't care for that; why should i care for that! if i were free to seek my own fortune - if i were free to go as a common sailor - if i were free to venture on my own account to the farthest end of the world - i would gladly go! i would have gladly gone, years ago, and taken my chance of what might come of it. but it was against my uncle's wishes, and against the plans he had formed for me; and there was an end of that. but what i feel, captain cuttle, is that we have been a little mistaken all along, and that, so far as any improvement in my prospects is concerned, i am no better off now than i was when i first entered dombey's house - perhaps a little worse, for the house may have been kindly inclined towards me then, and it certainly is not now.'
'turn again, whittington,' muttered the disconsolate captain, after looking at walter for some time.
'ay,' replied walter, laughing, 'and turn a great many times, too, captain cuttle, i'm afraid, before such fortune as his ever turns up again. not that i complain,' he added, in his lively, animated, energetic way. 'i have nothing to complain of. i am provided for. i can live. when i leave my uncle, i leave him to you; and i can leave him to no one better, captain cuttle. i haven't told you all this because i despair, not i; it's to convince you that i can't pick and choose in dombey's house, and that where i am sent, there i must go, and what i am offered, that i must take. it's better for my uncle that i should be sent away; for mr dombey is a valuable friend to him, as he proved himself, you know when, captain cuttle; and i am persuaded he won't be less valuable when he hasn't me there, every day, to awaken his dislike. so hurrah for the west indies, captain cuttle! how does that tune go that the sailors sing?
'for the port of barbados, boys!
cheerily!
leaving old england behind us, boys!
cheerily!' here the captain roared in chorus -
'oh cheerily, cheerily!
oh cheer-i-ly!'
the last line reaching the quick ears of an ardent skipper not quite sober, who lodged opposite, and who instantly sprung out of bed, threw up his window, and joined in, across the street, at the top of his voice, produced a fine effect. when it was impossible to sustain the concluding note any longer, the skipper bellowed forth a terrific 'ahoy!' intended in part as a friendly greeting, and in part to show that he was not at all breathed. that done, he shut down his window, and went to bed again.
'and now, captain cuttle,' said walter, handing him the blue coat and waistcoat, and bustling very much, 'if you'll come and break the news to uncle sol (which he ought to have known, days upon days ago, by rights), i'll leave you at the door, you know, and walk about until the afternoon.'
the captain, however, scarcely appeared to relish the commission, or to be by any means confident of his powers of executing it. he had arranged the future life and adventures of walter so very differently, and so entirely to his own satisfaction; he had felicitated himself so often on the sagacity and foresight displayed in that arrangement, and had found it so complete and perfect in all its parts; that to suffer it to go to pieces all at once, and even to assist in breaking it up, required a great effort of his resolution. the captain, too, found it difficult to unload his old ideas upon the subject, and to take a perfectly new cargo on board, with that rapidity which the circumstances required, or without jumbling and confounding the two. consequently, instead of putting on his coat and waistcoat with anything like the impetuosity that could alone have kept pace with walter's mood, he declined to invest himself with those garments at all at present; and informed walter that on such a serious matter, he must be allowed to 'bite his nails a bit'
'it's an old habit of mine, wal'r,' said the captain, 'any time these fifty year. when you see ned cuttle bite his nails, wal'r, then you may know that ned cuttle's aground.'
thereupon the captain put his iron hook between his teeth, as if it were a hand; and with an air of wisdom and profundity that was the very concentration and sublimation of all philosophical reflection and grave inquiry, applied himself to the consideration of the subject in its various branches.
'there's a friend of mine,' murmured the captain, in an absent manner, 'but he's at present coasting round to whitby, that would deliver such an opinion on this subject, or any other that could be named, as would give parliament six and beat 'em. been knocked overboard, that man,' said the captain, 'twice, and none the worse for it. was beat in his apprenticeship, for three weeks (off and on), about the head with a ring-bolt. and yet a clearer-minded man don't walk.'
despite of his respect for captain cuttle, walter could not help inwardly rejoicing at the absence of this sage, and devoutly hoping that his limpid intellect might not be brought to bear on his difficulties until they were quite settled.
'if you was to take and show that man the buoy at the nore,' said captain cuttle in the same tone, 'and ask him his opinion of it, wal'r, he'd give you an opinion that was no more like that buoy than your uncle's buttons are. there ain't a man that walks - certainly not on two legs - that can come near him. not near him!'
'what's his name, captain cuttle?' inquired walter, determined to be interested in the captain's friend.
'his name's bunsby, said the captain. 'but lord, it might be anything for the matter of that, with such a mind as his!'
the exact idea which the captain attached to this concluding piece of praise, he did not further elucidate; neither did walter seek to draw it forth. for on his beginning to review, with the vivacity natural to himself and to his situation, the leading points in his own affairs, he soon discovered that the captain had relapsed into his former profound state of mind; and that while he eyed him steadfastly from beneath his bushy eyebrows, he evidently neither saw nor heard him, but remained immersed in cogitation.
in fact, captain cuttle was labouring with such great designs, that far from being aground, he soon got off into the deepest of water, and could find no bottom to his penetration. by degrees it became perfectly plain to the captain that there was some mistake here; that it was undoubtedly much more likely to be walter's mistake than his; that if there were really any west india scheme afoot, it was a very different one from what walter, who was young and rash, supposed; and could only be some new device for making his fortune with unusual celerity. 'or if there should be any little hitch between 'em,' thought the captain, meaning between walter and mr dombey, 'it only wants a word in season from a friend of both parties, to set it right and smooth, and make all taut again.' captain cuttle's deduction from these considerations was, that as he already enjoyed the pleasure of knowing mr dombey, from having spent a very agreeable half-hour in his company at brighton (on the morning when they borrowed the money); and that, as a couple of men of the world, who understood each other, and were mutually disposed to make things comfortable, could easily arrange any little difficulty of this sort, and come at the real facts; the friendly thing for him to do would be, without saying anything about it to walter at present, just to step up to mr dombey's house - say to the servant 'would ye be so good, my lad, as report cap'en cuttle here?' - meet mr dombey in a confidential spirit- hook him by the button-hole - talk it over - make it all right - and come away triumphant!
as these reflections presented themselves to the captain's mind, and by slow degrees assumed this shape and form, his visage cleared like a doubtful morning when it gives place to a bright noon. his eyebrows, which had been in the highest degree portentous, smoothed their rugged bristling aspect, and became serene; his eyes, which had been nearly closed in the severity of his mental exercise, opened freely; a smile which had been at first but three specks - one at the right-hand corner of his mouth, and one at the corner of each eye - gradually overspread his whole face, and, rippling up into his forehead, lifted the glazed hat: as if that too had been aground with captain cuttle, and were now, like him, happily afloat again.
finally, the captain left off biting his nails, and said, 'now, wal'r, my boy, you may help me on with them slops.' by which the captain meant his coat and waistcoat.
walter little imagined why the captain was so particular in the arrangement of his cravat, as to twist the pendent ends into a sort of pigtail, and pass them through a massive gold ring with a picture of a tomb upon it, and a neat iron railing, and a tree, in memory of some deceased friend. nor why the captain pulled up his shirt-collar to the utmost limits allowed by the irish linen below, and by so doing decorated himself with a complete pair of blinkers; nor why he changed his shoes, and put on an unparalleled pair of ankle-jacks, which he only wore on extraordinary occasions. the captain being at length attired to his own complete satisfaction, and having glanced at himself from head to foot in a shaving-glass which he removed from a nail for that purpose, took up his knotted stick, and said he was ready.
the captain's walk was more complacent than usual when they got out into the street; but this walter supposed to be the effect of the ankle-jacks, and took little heed of. before they had gone very far, they encountered a woman selling flowers; when the captain stopping short, as if struck by a happy idea, made a purchase of the largest bundle in her basket: a most glorious nosegay, fan-shaped, some two feet and a half round, and composed of all the jolliest-looking flowers that blow.
armed with this little token which he designed for mr dombey, captain cuttle walked on with walter until they reached the instrument-maker's door, before which they both paused.
'you're going in?' said walter.
'yes,' returned the captain, who felt that walter must be got rid of before he proceeded any further, and that he had better time his projected visit somewhat later in the day.
'and you won't forget anything?'
'no,' returned the captain.
'i'll go upon my walk at once,' said walter, 'and then i shall be out of the way, captain cuttle.'
'take a good long 'un, my lad!' replied the captain, calling after him. walter waved his hand in assent, and went his way.
his way was nowhere in particular; but he thought he would go out into the fields, where he could reflect upon the unknown life before him, and resting under some tree, ponder quietly. he knew no better fields than those near hampstead, and no better means of getting at them than by passing mr dombey's house.
it was as stately and as dark as ever, when he went by and glanced up at its frowning front. the blinds were all pulled down, but the upper windows stood wide open, and the pleasant air stirring those curtains and waving them to and fro was the only sign of animation in the whole exterior. walter walked softly as he passed, and was glad when he had left the house a door or two behind.
he looked back then; with the interest he had always felt for the place since the adventure of the lost child, years ago; and looked especially at those upper windows. while he was thus engaged, a chariot drove to the door, and a portly gentleman in black, with a heavy watch-chain, alighted, and went in. when he afterwards remembered this gentleman and his equipage together, walter had no doubt be was a physician; and then he wondered who was ill; but the discovery did not occur to him until he had walked some distance, thinking listlessly of other things.
though still, of what the house had suggested to him; for walter pleased himself with thinking that perhaps the time might come, when the beautiful child who was his old friend and had always been so grateful to him and so glad to see him since, might interest her brother in his behalf and influence his fortunes for the better. he liked to imagine this - more, at that moment, for the pleasure of imagining her continued remembrance of him, than for any worldly profit he might gain: but another and more sober fancy whispered to him that if he were alive then, he would be beyond the sea and forgotten; she married, rich, proud, happy. there was no more reason why she should remember him with any interest in such an altered state of things, than any plaything she ever had. no, not so much.
yet walter so idealised the pretty child whom he had found wandering in the rough streets, and so identified her with her innocent gratitude of that night and the simplicity and truth of its expression, that he blushed for himself as a libeller when he argued that she could ever grow proud. on the other hand, his meditations were of that fantastic order that it seemed hardly less libellous in him to imagine her grown a woman: to think of her as anything but the same artless, gentle, winning little creature, that she had been in the days of good mrs brown. in a word, walter found out that to reason with himself about florence at all, was to become very unreasonable indeed; and that he could do no better than preserve her image in his mind as something precious, unattainable, unchangeable, and indefinite - indefinite in all but its power of giving him pleasure, and restraining him like an angel's hand from anything unworthy.
it was a long stroll in the fields that walter took that day, listening to the birds, and the sunday bells, and the softened murmur of the town - breathing sweet scents; glancing sometimes at the dim horizon beyond which his voyage and his place of destination lay; then looking round on the green english grass and the home landscape. but he hardly once thought, even of going away, distinctly; and seemed to put off reflection idly, from hour to hour, and from minute to minute, while he yet went on reflecting all the time.
walter had left the fields behind him, and was plodding homeward in the same abstracted mood, when he heard a shout from a man, and then a woman's voice calling to him loudly by name. turning quickly in his surprise, he saw that a hackney-coach, going in the contrary direction, had stopped at no great distance; that the coachman was looking back from his box and making signals to him with his whip; and that a young woman inside was leaning out of the window, and beckoning with immense energy. running up to this coach, he found that the young woman was miss nipper, and that miss nipper was in such a flutter as to be almost beside herself.
'staggs's gardens, mr walter!' said miss nipper; 'if you please, oh do!'
'eh?' cried walter; 'what is the matter?'
'oh, mr walter, staggs's gardens, if you please!' said susan.
'there!' cried the coachman, appealing to walter, with a sort of exalting despair; 'that's the way the young lady's been a goin' on for up'ards of a mortal hour, and me continivally backing out of no thoroughfares, where she would drive up. i've had a many fares in this coach, first and last, but never such a fare as her.'
'do you want to go to staggs's gardens, susan?' inquired walter.
'ah! she wants to go there! where is it?' growled the coachman.
'i don't know where it is!' exclaimed susan, wildly. 'mr walter, i was there once myself, along with miss floy and our poor darling master paul, on the very day when you found miss floy in the city, for we lost her coming home, mrs richards and me, and a mad bull, and mrs richards's eldest, and though i went there afterwards, i can't remember where it is, i think it's sunk into the ground. oh, mr walter, don't desert me, staggs's gardens, if you please! miss floy's darling - all our darlings - little, meek, meek master paul! oh mr walter!'
'good god!' cried walter. 'is he very ill?'
'the pretty flower!' cried susan, wringing her hands, 'has took the fancy that he'd like to see his old nurse, and i've come to bring her to his bedside, mrs staggs, of polly toodle's gardens, someone pray!'
greatly moved by what he heard, and catching susan's earnestness immediately, walter, now that he understood the nature of her errand, dashed into it with such ardour that the coachman had enough to do to follow closely as he ran before, inquiring here and there and everywhere, the way to staggs's gardens.
there was no such place as staggs's gardens. it had vanished from the earth. where the old rotten summer-houses once had stood, palaces now reared their heads, and granite columns of gigantic girth opened a vista to the railway world beyond. the miserable waste ground, where the refuse-matter had been heaped of yore, was swallowed up and gone; and in its frowsy stead were tiers of warehouses, crammed with rich goods and costly merchandise. the old by-streets now swarmed with passengers and vehicles of every kind: the new streets that had stopped disheartened in the mud and waggon-ruts, formed towns within themselves, originating wholesome comforts and conveniences belonging to themselves, and never tried nor thought of until they sprung into existence. bridges that had led to nothing, led to villas, gardens, churches, healthy public walks. the carcasses of houses, and beginnings of new thoroughfares, had started off upon the line at steam's own speed, and shot away into the country in a monster train.'
as to the neighbourhood which had hesitated to acknowledge the railroad in its straggling days, that had grown wise and penitent, as any christian might in such a case, and now boasted of its powerful and prosperous relation. there were railway patterns in its drapers' shops, and railway journals in the windows of its newsmen. there were railway hotels, office-houses, lodging-houses, boarding-houses; railway plans, maps, views, wrappers, bottles, sandwich-boxes, and time-tables; railway hackney-coach and stands; railway omnibuses, railway streets and buildings, railway hangers-on and parasites, and flatterers out of all calculation. there was even railway time observed in clocks, as if the sun itself had given in. among the vanquished was the master chimney-sweeper, whilom incredulous at staggs's gardens, who now lived in a stuccoed house three stories high, and gave himself out, with golden flourishes upon a varnished board, as contractor for the cleansing of railway chimneys by machinery.
to and from the heart of this great change, all day and night, throbbing currents rushed and returned incessantly like its life's blood. crowds of people and mountains of goods, departing and arriving scores upon scores of times in every four-and-twenty hours, produced a fermentation in the place that was always in action. the very houses seemed disposed to pack up and take trips. wonderful members of parliament, who, little more than twenty years before, had made themselves merry with the wild railroad theories of engineers, and given them the liveliest rubs in cross-examination, went down into the north with their watches in their hands, and sent on messages before by the electric telegraph, to say that they were coming. night and day the conquering engines rumbled at their distant work, or, advancing smoothly to their journey's end, and gliding like tame dragons into the allotted corners grooved out to the inch for their reception, stood bubbling and trembling there, making the walls quake, as if they were dilating with the secret knowledge of great powers yet unsuspected in them, and strong purposes not yet achieved.
but staggs's gardens had been cut up root and branch. oh woe the day when 'not a rood of english ground' - laid out in staggs's gardens - is secure!
at last, after much fruitless inquiry, walter, followed by the coach and susan, found a man who had once resided in that vanished land, and who was no other than the master sweep before referred to, grown stout, and knocking a double knock at his own door. he knowed toodle, he said, well. belonged to the railroad, didn't he?
'yes' sir, yes!' cried susan nipper from the coach window.
where did he live now? hastily inquired walter.
he lived in the company's own buildings, second turning to the right, down the yard, cross over, and take the second on the right again. it was number eleven; they couldn't mistake it; but if they did, they had only to ask for toodle, engine fireman, and any one would show them which was his house. at this unexpected stroke of success susan nipper dismounted from the coach with all speed, took walter's arm, and set off at a breathless pace on foot; leaving the coach there to await their return.
'has the little boy been long ill, susan?' inquired walter, as they hurried on.
'ailing for a deal of time, but no one knew how much,' said susan; adding, with excessive sharpness, 'oh, them blimbers!'
'blimbers?' echoed walter.
'i couldn't forgive myself at such a time as this, mr walter,' said susan, 'and when there's so much serious distress to think about, if i rested hard on anyone, especially on them that little darling paul speaks well of, but i may wish that the family was set to work in a stony soil to make new roads, and that miss blimber went in front, and had the pickaxe!'
miss nipper then took breath, and went on faster than before, as if this extraordinary aspiration had relieved her. walter, who had by this time no breath of his own to spare, hurried along without asking any more questions; and they soon, in their impatience, burst in at a little door and came into a clean parlour full of children.
'where's mrs richards?' exclaimed susan nipper, looking round. 'oh mrs richards, mrs richards, come along with me, my dear creetur!'
'why, if it ain't susan!' cried polly, rising with her honest face and motherly figure from among the group, in great surprise.
'yes, mrs richards, it's me,' said susan, 'and i wish it wasn't, though i may not seem to flatter when i say so, but little master paul is very ill, and told his pa today that he would like to see the face of his old nurse, and him and miss floy hope you'll come along with me - and mr walter, mrs richards - forgetting what is past, and do a kindness to the sweet dear that is withering away. oh, mrs richards, withering away!' susan nipper crying, polly shed tears to see her, and to hear what she had said; and all the children gathered round (including numbers of new babies); and mr toodle, who had just come home from birmingham, and was eating his dinner out of a basin, laid down his knife and fork, and put on his wife's bonnet and shawl for her, which were hanging up behind the door; then tapped her on the back; and said, with more fatherly feeling than eloquence, 'polly! cut away!'
so they got back to the coach, long before the coachman expected them; and walter, putting susan and mrs richards inside, took his seat on the box himself that there might be no more mistakes, and deposited them safely in the hall of mr dombey's house - where, by the bye, he saw a mighty nosegay lying, which reminded him of the one captain cuttle had purchased in his company that morning. he would have lingered to know more of the young invalid, or waited any length of time to see if he could render the least service; but, painfully sensible that such conduct would be looked upon by mr dombey as presumptuous and forward, he turned slowly, sadly, anxiously, away.
he had not gone five minutes' walk from the door, when a man came running after him, and begged him to return. walter retraced his steps as quickly as he could, and entered the gloomy house with a sorrowful foreboding.
沃尔特好几天打不定主意,去巴巴多斯的事情该怎么办;甚至他还怀着几分微弱的希望:董贝先生也许说话并不当真,或者他也可能会改变主意,通知他不去了;可是他这种想法本身就是极不可能的,能证实这种想法的任何迹象也没有出现,而时间又在消逝,他不能再延误下去了,所以他觉得必须毫不迟疑地采取行动。
沃尔特的主要困难在于怎样把他工作的变动情况透露给所尔舅舅;他知道这对他是一个可怕的打击。他感到尤其困难的是说出这个惊人的消息来摧毁所尔舅舅的情绪,因为老人最近情绪有了很大好转,有说有笑,小后客厅又恢复了往日欢乐的气氛。所尔舅舅已经把第一批债款归还给董贝先生,并满怀希望,能设法把其余的欠债还清。当他勇敢地从艰难中振作起来的时候,重新让他垂头丧气,这真是一件令人痛苦、迫不得已的事情。
然而决不能背着他悄悄地溜走。应当事先让他知道这件事。问题是怎样告诉他。至于去或不去,沃尔特认为他丝毫没有选择的权力。董贝先生明白无误地跟他说过,他年轻,舅舅的境况又不好;董贝先生还在伴随的眼光中清楚地提醒他,如果他拒绝去的话,那么他可以待在家中,但却不能待在他的办公室里。他舅舅和他都欠董贝先生的恩情;这份恩情还是沃尔特亲自去恳求来的。他也许已开始暗暗感到,他永远没有希望博得那位先生的好感,他也许还想到,董贝先生还不时藐视他,而那是很不公正的。可是不论情况是否这样,职责毕竟是职责,而职责是必须履行的,沃尔特心里这样想。
当董贝先生看着他,跟他说,他年轻,他舅舅的境况又不好的时候,脸上曾经流露出一种轻蔑的神色,傲慢不恭地、对他贬损地认为,他乐意游手好闲地依靠一个穷困没落的老头子过活;这一点刺痛了这个孩子高尚的心灵。沃尔特决定不用言语表白,而尽可能使董贝先生相信,他确实把他的品格看错了,所以在那次有关去西印度群岛的谈话之后,他急切地表现出比先前更加愉快和活跃,就像一个像他那样机灵、热心的孩子所能表现的。他太年轻,太缺乏经验,没有想到,他这种性格本身就可能使董贝先生不喜欢;董贝先生强烈的不高兴不论是正确的还是错误的,反正在它那阴影之下,这孩子表现出应变自如,有希望依然快快活活的样子,是决不会使他产生好印象的。相反倒很可能,在那位大人物看来,这颗诚实的心灵的这种新的表露是对他的公然反抗,因此他决意把它压下去。
“唉!最终反正总得告诉所尔舅舅的,”沃尔特叹了一口气,想道。沃尔特担心的是,如果由他本人告诉老人,并看到这消息在他起了皱纹的脸上所引起的第一阵反应的话,那么他的声音也许会稍稍颤抖,他脸上的神色也许不能像他所希望的那样轻松愉快,因此他决定去请卡特尔船长这位能干的斡旋者来帮忙。于是,星期天吃过早饭以后,他就从家里出发,再一次出其不意地到卡特尔船长的住所去。
他在途中愉快地记起,麦克斯廷杰太太每逢星期天上午都要到一个很远的地方去听梅尔奇斯代克·豪洛尔大师说教。这位大师原先在西印度船坞工作,后来由于仇人诬陷,说他曾用手锥钻破大酒桶,然后把嘴唇贴住洞孔偷喝桶中的酒,因此有一天他就被解除了职务;他曾经宣称,世界将在两年后的那一天上午十点钟毁灭;他开放一个客厅来接待狂热教派1的男女信徒们;在他们第一次的集会上,梅尔奇斯代克的训戒产生了很大的影响,在仪式结束时,他们欢天喜地地大跳圣舞,所以有的人竟都塌陷到下面的厨房里,把一个信徒的碾压机也砸坏了。
--------
1狂热教派:早期美以美教派中大声祈祷或说教的教派。
这些轶事是船长那天晚上把钱支付给经纪人布罗格里之后,反复唱那支《佩格姑娘》曲子的中间,在非常欢乐的时刻讲给沃尔特和他舅舅听的。船长自己也按时上一个邻近的教堂去。那教堂每逢星期天上午就升起英国国旗。因为教区事务员身体病弱,他就在那里好心地照管孩子们;由于他那神秘的钩子所起的作用,他在孩子们中间享有很高的威望。沃尔特知道船长从不改变他的习惯,所以尽快赶路,以便在他出门之前到达。他的速度很快,当他拐弯走进布里格广场的时候,他高兴地看到,那宽大的蓝色外衣和背心正悬挂在船长的打开的窗子的外面,在太阳下晾晒。
凡人的肉眼居然能看到外衣和背心离开船长的身体,这似乎是难以使人相信的;但他这时确实没有穿它们,否则他的双腿就堵塞住那毫无遮拦的临街的前门了,因为布里格广场的房屋是不高的。沃尔特对这发现很感惊奇,敲了一下门。
“斯廷杰,”他清楚地听到船长在楼上的房间里说道,仿佛敲门声跟他不相干似的,所以沃尔特就敲了两下。
“卡特尔,”他听到船长应答了一声,不一会儿,船长穿着干净的衬衣,裤上吊着干净的背带,围巾像一卷绳子一样松松地挂在脖子周围,头上戴着上了光的帽子,出现在窗口,在宽大的蓝色外衣和背心上方探出身来。
“沃尔,”船长惊奇地朝下看着他,喊道。
“是的,是的,卡特尔船长,”沃尔特回答道,“只是我一个人。”
“出了什么事了,我的孩子?”船长十分忧虑地问道,“吉尔斯是不是又有什么不幸了?”
“没有,没有,”沃尔特回答道,“舅舅很好,卡特尔船长。”
船长表示高兴,说他就下来开门。他这样做了。
“不过你来得很早,沃尔,”他们上楼之后,船长仍然怀疑地看着他,说道。
“啊,事情是这样,卡特尔船长,”沃尔特坐下说道,“我怕您会出去,而我想请您帮帮忙,像朋友般地给我出出主意。”
“行啊,”船长说道,“你想要什么呢?”
“我想要您的意见,”沃尔特笑嘻嘻地说道,“我只要这个。”
“那就往下说吧,”船长说道,“打起精神来,我的孩子!”
沃尔特向他叙述了发生的事情,叙述了他感到关于舅舅的困难,叙述了如果卡特尔船长能好意地帮助他克服困难的话,那么这对他来说将会是如释重负。卡特尔船长对展现在面前的未来的情景感到无限的震惊与慌张,这种惊愕的情绪逐渐地把他吞没,因此他的脸上失去了任何表情,连那蓝色的衣服、上了光的帽子和那只钩子也像失去了主人似的。
“您知道,卡特尔船长,”沃尔特继续说道,“就我自己来说,正如董贝先生所说的,我年轻,不需要考虑我。我明白,我得在这世界上给自己打出条道路来。但是在来这里的路上,我想,关于舅舅,我必须特别考虑到两点。我不是想说,我当之无愧是他生活的乐趣和他引以自豪的人——请您相信,我明白这一点——,但事实上我又确实是那样的。您说呢,难道您认为我不是吗?”
船长似乎竭力想从他震惊的深渊中挣扎起来,恢复脸上的表情,但却徒劳无益;那上了光的帽子只是默默无声地、带着难以表达的含意点了一下头。
“如果我活着,身体健康,”沃尔特说道,“这一点我倒并不担心,但是尽管这样,要是我离开了英国,我就很难希望再见到舅舅了。他已经老了,卡特尔船长;再说,他是按照习惯生活的——”
“停一下,沃尔!是不是没有顾客?1”船长突然恢复了原来的神态,问道。
--------
1英文custom的一个意义是习惯,另一个意义是顾客。沃尔特说的是习惯,船长误会为顾客。
“完全正确,”沃尔特点点头,回答道,“不过我想说的是,他是按照平时的习惯生活的,卡特尔船长,我说的是这个意思。如果说(就像您正确地指出的那样),他失去了存货和他这么多年已经习惯了的所有物品,他就会早死,那么,难道您认为他不会死得更早一些吗,如果他失去了——”
“他的外甥,”船长插嘴道,“说得对!”
“所以说,”沃尔特想法说得高兴一些,“我们必须尽最大的努力让他相信,这次离别毕竟只不过是一次短暂的离别;但是因为我更了解真情,或者说我担心我更了解真情,而且因为我有许许多多的理由要以热爱、孝顺与尊敬的感情来对待他,因此我害怕,如果由我想方设法来说服他的话,那么,我会把事情弄得十分糟糕的,这就是为什么我希望由您来告诉他的主要理由,这是第一点。”
“把方位拨过一点!”1船长用沉思的声音说道。
--------
1由于沃尔特讲了一点、二点,引起船长讲了一句航海用语。
“您说什么,卡特尔船长?”沃尔特问道。
“做好准备!”船长若有所思地回答道。
沃尔特停了一下,想听听船长是不是还要再补充一些意见,但是船长没有再讲什么,沃尔特就继续说下去。
“现在讲第二点,卡特尔船长。我很遗憾地告诉您,我不是董贝先生所喜爱的人。我一直来总是想方设法,作出我最大的努力,我也确实总是这样做的,可是他却不喜欢我。也许他不能左右自己的喜爱与厌恶,这一点我也不想说什么。我只是说,我敢肯定他不喜欢我。他派我到那里去,并不是因为那是个好差使;他不想把事情说得比实际好一些,他不屑于这样做;我不相信这次调动会帮助我在公司里晋升职位;相反的,我怀疑是不是要用这个办法把我永远打发掉,以便扫除障碍。可是这些话我们一句也别跟舅舅说,卡特尔船长,我们一定得尽量把这次派遣说成是一个有利的、前程远大的差使;我向您吐露真情,只是为了我在远方万一需要帮助的时候,在祖国能有一个知道我真实情况的朋友。”
“沃尔,我的孩子,”船长回答道,“在所罗门箴言中,你可以找到下面的话:‘让我们永远不缺少患难中的朋友,也不缺少送给他喝的酒!’你找到的时候,请把它记下来。”
这时船长以胜过千言万语的坦白真诚的神情,向沃尔特伸出手来;由于他对准确引用所罗门箴言和运用得当而感到得意,所以又重复说道:“你找到的时候,请把它记下来。”
“卡特尔船长,”沃尔特把船长伸出的大拳头满满地握在两只手中说,“除了所尔舅舅,您是我最爱的人。确实,在这世界上我没有更能信赖的人了。单单就离别这件事情本身来说,卡特尔船长,我并不把它放在心上;我为什么要把它放在心上呢!如果我可以自由地去寻找运气的话,如果我可以当一名普通的船员出去的话,如果我可以自由地自己承担风险,航行到天涯海角的话,那么我将高高兴兴地出去!我可能几年前就已经高高兴兴地出去碰碰我的运气如何了。但是这违背我舅舅的愿望,违背他为我所制订的计划,所以事情也就到此完结了。但是,卡特尔船长,我觉得我们过去有一些错误;就改善我的前途来说,我现在出去并不比当初一进董贝公司的时候就出去更好,也许还更坏一些,因为当时公司可能对我怀有好感,现在则肯定没有了。”
“回来吧,惠廷顿,”闷闷不乐的船长向沃尔特看了一些时候之后,低声说道。
“好的,”沃尔特哈哈大笑地回答道,“我担心,卡特尔船长,在像他那样的运气来到之前我就回来好多次了。并不是我要抱怨,”他活泼愉快、生气蓬勃、精神饱满地补充说道,“我没有什么要抱怨的。我丰衣足食,我能活下去。当我离开舅舅的时候,我把他交给您。我不能把他交给更好的人了,卡特尔船长。我跟您讲这一切,并不是因为我悲观失望。不,我不会的。我只是让您相信,我在董贝公司里对工作安排不能挑挑拣拣;派我到哪里去我就得到哪里去;向我建议什么,我就得接受什么。我被派出去对舅舅来说反倒更好,因为董贝先生是他尊贵的朋友,就像他过去实际所表明的那样,这一点您很清楚,卡特尔船长。我深信,如果我不在公司里天天引起他的厌恶的话,那么他还会像过去一样继续是他尊贵的朋友。所以说,西印度群岛万岁,卡特尔船长!船员们的那支歌是怎么唱的?”
“兴高采烈地,向着巴巴多斯港口前进吧,小伙子们!兴高采烈地,把古老的英国抛在后面吧,小伙子们!”
这时船长大声地参加合唱道:“啊,兴高采烈地,兴高采烈地!啊,兴高——采烈地!”
对面屋子里住着一位热心的小商船的船长,当最后一行歌词传到他灵敏的耳朵里时,他醉意未消,没有完全清醒过来,但却立刻从床上跳起来,打开窗子,放开嗓门,越过街道,参加合唱,产生了优美的效果。当他不能把最后的音调再支撑着唱下去的时候,他可怕地大叫了一声:“啊嗬!”,一方面是作为友好的问候,另一方面是想表示他还没有歇过一口气。然后,他关上窗子,重新躺到床上睡觉。
“现在,卡特尔船长,”沃尔特把蓝色的外衣和背心递给他,手脚十分忙乱地说,“如果您把这个消息去透露给所尔舅舅(按理说,他本来好几天以前就该知道它了),那么,到了我家门口,您知道,我就将跟您分手,在附近一带溜达溜达,直到下午。”
可是船长看来丝毫也不高兴接受这个任务,要不就是对他完成这个任务的能力完全没有信心。他曾经给沃尔特未来的生活与事业作过截然不同的安排,并对它感到完全称心满意;他对他在这个安排中所表现出的明智与预见性时常沾沾自喜,觉得这个安排的各个方面都完美无缺,因此现在要让这个安排在顷刻之间土崩瓦解,甚至还要帮助去破坏它,这需要他的意志作出很大的努力才行。船长还觉得要把他对这个问题的老想法从头脑中去掉,迅速换上全新的想法,就像要按照情势所要求的火急速度,把船上的老货物卸下,装上一批全新的货物,而又不把两批货物混杂、弄乱一样困难。因此,他没有跟沃尔特的心情合拍,急匆匆地穿上外衣和背心,而是拒绝现在就把这些衣服套在身上;他告诉沃尔特,这样重大的事情,应该允许他“咬一下指甲”。
“这是我的老习惯,沃尔,”船长说,“已经有五十年了。当你看到内德·卡特尔在咬指甲,那么,沃尔,你就可以知道,内德·卡特尔搁浅了。”
于是,船长把铁钩插在牙齿中间,仿佛那是一只手似的,同时露出富于智慧和思想深刻的神态,聚精会神地思考着这个问题的各个方面;他那智慧与深刻的思想是哲学的思考与认真的研究所集中与升华的结果。
“我有一位朋友,”船长神情恍惚地低声说道,“他会对这个问题以及其他任何问题发表意见;他曾把六比一的有利条件让给议会1,来和议会就某个问题打赌,结果他仍能胜过他们;可是他现在正沿着惠特比2岸边航行。”船长继续说下去,“这个人曾经两次从船上被冲打到水里,但却安然无恙,丝毫不受影响。他当学徒的时候,头上曾经被环端螺栓刺扎,断断续续的加起来有三个星期之久,可是在世界上仍找不到头脑比他更聪明的人。”
沃尔特虽然尊敬卡特尔船长,但却不由得由于这位聪明人不在而暗暗高兴;他衷心希望,在他的困难妥善解决之前,他的大智大慧不要用来处理它们。
“如果你把诺尔3的一个浮标给他看,”卡特尔船长用同样的声调说道,“请他谈谈他对它的看法的话,沃尔,那么他会说出一个跟浮标毫无关系的看法,就像你舅舅的钮扣跟浮标毫无关系一样。世界上没有一个人——至少是没有一个靠·两·条腿走路的人——能比得上他。没有能比得上他的!”
--------
1即如议会胜了,他赔六份;如他胜了,他得一份。
2惠特比(whitby):英格兰北约克郡的一个城镇,濒临北海,地处埃斯克(esk)河口港湾东侧。
3诺尔(thenore):英格兰肯特郡泰晤士河口湾一段沙滩。
“他姓什么,卡特尔船长?”沃尔特问道,他决定对船长的朋友发生兴趣。
“他姓邦斯贝,”船长说道,“可是我的天主!其实,像他那样头脑的人,你管他姓什么都可以!”
船长没有进一步阐明最后一句赞语的确切含意,沃尔特也没有对它寻根究底。因为当他有声有色地(就他和他的处境来说,这是很自然的)重新叙述他的主要困难时,他立刻发现船长又重新陷入先前那深思远虑的状态中。虽然他从浓密的眉毛下一动不动地凝视着他,可是他显然并没有看见他,也没有听见他说话,而是沉浸在思考之中。
实际上,卡特尔船长正在拟订宏伟的计划;他根本没有搁浅,而是很快就进入水的最深处,而且无法探找到他要穿透的底层。船长逐渐地完全看清了事情的原委:这里存在着一些误会,毫无疑问,这很可能是沃尔特而不是他所产生的误会。如果真有什么西印度群岛计划将讨诸实施的话,那么它也跟年轻、性急的沃尔特所设想的大不相同;它只能是使他飞黄腾达的一种新安排。船长心里想,“或者如果在他们之间(他是指在沃尔特与董贝先生之间)有点什么小小的疙瘩的话,那么只消双方的老朋友适时地说上一句话,那就可以完全解开,大家就会重新和好如初,就像把两条钩住的船调理顺当一样。”卡特尔船长从这些考虑中得出的想法是,由于他已经有幸认识董贝先生,在他们借钱的那个上午,曾经在布赖顿和他在一起很愉快地消度了半个小时;再说他们既然都是上流社会的人,而且相互了解,愿意把事情处理得和顺得当,那样就会很容易解决这样一类小小的困难,弄清事实真相;因此,他应尽的朋友之谊就是:现在什么话也不对沃尔特说,而是直接走到董贝先生的公馆,对仆人说,“老弟,劳驾您通报一下,卡特尔船长到这里来了。”然后在极为信任的气氛中会见董贝先生——钩住他的钮扣孔——,交谈一切,把事情处理得完善妥贴,然后得意扬扬地离开!
当这些想法出现在船长心中,逐渐成形的时候,他的脸色开朗起来,就像阴云密布的早晨退让给阳光灿烂的中午一样。他的眉毛原先极为不祥地紧皱着,现在不再直直地竖立,而是舒展开来,安祥平静;他的眼睛原先在紧张的思想活动过程中几乎已经闭上了,现在则随意地张开;他的微笑最初只出现在三小点——嘴的右角和两只眼角——,现在逐渐扩展到整个脸庞,向上波送到前额,掀起了那顶上了光的帽子;这帽子原先仿佛跟卡特尔船长一样搁了浅,现在则又跟他一样,愉快地漂浮起来了。
船长终于不再咬指甲,说:“现在,沃尔特,我的孩子,你帮我穿上衣服吧!”船长指的是他的外衣和背心。
沃尔特想不出,船长系领带为什么会那么用心,他把垂下的两端拧成像辫子一样的东西,然后穿进一个大金戒指中,戒指上刻着一幅图画,画中有一座坟墓、一条洁净的铁栏杆和一株树,它是纪念某个死去的朋友的。沃尔特也想不出船长为什么把衬衫领子使劲往上拉,拉到下面的爱尔兰亚麻布衬衫所许可的最大限度,这样一来他看上去就有了一副完好的遮眼罩来装饰自己了。沃尔特也想不出,船长为什么脱下鞋子,换上那双世上无双的短靴,那是他在不寻常的场合才穿的。船长终于穿着完毕,自己完全感到称心满意;他从墙钉上取下一面修脸用的镜子,从头到脚把自己打量了一番,然后拿起他那根多节的手杖说,他已经准备好了。
当他们走上街道的时候,船长的步态比往常显得更加踌躇满志,但沃尔特以为那是由于短靴的作用,对它并不注意。他们没走多远,遇到一位卖花的女人,船长突然停下脚步,仿佛心血来潮,闪出一个巧妙主意似的;他把她篮子里最大的一束花买下来,那是一个极为光彩夺目、芳香四溢的花束,形状像扇子,周围约有两英尺半,全都由最鲜艳的花朵组成。
卡特尔船长准备了这份打算送给董贝先生的礼品之后,跟沃尔特继续向前走去,直到他们到达仪器制造商门前,两人才都停下脚步。
“您就进去吗?”沃尔特问道。
“是的,”船长答道。他觉得在采取下一步行动之前必须首先把沃尔特打发走,他打算进行的拜访最好推迟到当天晚一些时候。
“您不会忘记什么吗?”沃尔特问道。
“不会,”船长回答。
“我马上就去溜达,”沃尔特说道,“我不妨碍您了,卡特尔船长。”
“好好地多逛一逛,我的孩子!”般长在他身后大声喊道。
沃尔特挥挥手,表示同意,接着就继续向前走去。
他没有特定的地方要去;但他想到田野里去走走,他在那里可以考虑考虑将来未知的生活,可以在树下一边休息一边安静地思索。他觉得汉姆普斯特德1附近的风光最美,而通向那里最好的道路是从董贝先生公馆旁边经过的。
--------
1汉姆普斯特德(hampstead):伦敦郊区地方。
当沃尔特从董贝先生的公馆旁边走过,向上望一眼,看到它那愁眉不展的正面的时候,它跟往常一样庄严、阴暗。所有的窗帘都已垂下,但上面的窗子是敞开着的,凉爽的微风吹拂着窗帘来回飘动,这是整座房屋外部唯一带有生气的迹象。沃尔特轻轻地走过,当他又走过几家人家的时候,他心里觉得高兴。
自从几年前发生了迷路的女孩子的事情以后,他经常对这房屋感到兴趣,这时他正是怀着这样的兴趣往回看,特别是望着上面一层的窗子。当他正这样看着的时候,一辆轻便四轮马车来到门前,一位举止庄重、穿着黑衣服、挂着一条沉甸甸的表链子的先生下了马车,走进屋里去。沃尔特后来回忆起这位先生和他的马车,他毫无疑问那人是位医生,于是心中纳闷起来,究竟是谁病了呢?可是他没有得出答案。他无精打采地想着其他事情,又走了一段距离。
不过他仍然想到这座房屋对他意味着什么,因为沃尔特总是爱以这样的希望来使自己高兴,那就是:也许总有那么一天,那位女孩子(她是他的老朋友,从那时以来,总是那样感谢他,那样高兴看到他)会使她弟弟关心他,使他的命运好转。但是在这时候他更喜欢想到的是,她仍继续记得他,而不是他可能得到什么世俗的利益;可是另一个更为清醒的想法在他耳边低声说道,如果那时候他还活着的话,那么他将在海外漂泊,被她遗忘;她则已经成婚,富有,高傲,幸福。世事沧桑,在完全改变了的情况下,她没有什么理由要比对一个她曾经有过的玩具更多地记得他;不会的,那时在她的记忆中,他可能还不如玩具呢。
可是沃尔特把那位流落在喧闹的街上、被他找到的那位漂亮的女孩子理想化了,把她与她在那天夜里天真的感谢以及在感谢中所表现出的纯朴、真诚等同化了,所以他认为,把她想成今后会变得高傲,这是对她的侮辱,他为此而感到羞愧。另一方面,他的沉思默想又是那么荒诞无稽,在他看来,如果想像到她已成长为一个女人,如果不是把她想成她跟善良的布朗太太在一起时那样一位纯朴、温柔、可爱的小人儿,而是想成另外一位什么人的话,那么这也同样是对她的侮辱。总之,沃尔特觉得由他本人来评断弗洛伦斯的是非长短,确实是会很不近情理的;他最好是把她的形象作为宝贵的、难以达到的、永不改变的、模糊不清的一种什么东西保存在心中;它具有使他快乐,像一只天使的手一样制止他进行任何卑劣勾当的力量,这一点却不是模糊不清的。
沃尔特那天在田野里游逛得很久,他听着鸟儿的啾鸣、礼拜天的钟声、城市中比平日减弱了的喧嚣声,同时呼吸着芳香的空气,有时举目眺望那朦胧不清的地平线,因为他的航程与目的地就在地平线的那一方;然后他又环顾四周英国的青草和故乡的风景。可是他几乎没有一次明确地想到他即将远离;他似乎一小时又一小时,一分钟又一分钟地把这思想搁置一旁,不去理会,尽管他始终在继续不断地想着它。
沃尔特已经把田野抛在后面,正怀着同样恍惚的心情,拖着沉重的脚步往回家的路途上行走,这时候他听到一个男人喊叫了一声,接着一个女人的声音响亮地喊着他的名字。他惊奇地转过身去,看到一辆朝着相反方向跑去的出租轿式马车在不远的地方停了下来;马车夫从座位上转过头来看他,向他挥鞭示意;车里一位年轻的女人从窗子里探出身来,精力充沛地向他打招呼。他跑到马车跟前,看到这位年轻女人就是尼珀姑娘;她万分焦急不安,几乎都要发狂了。
“斯塔格斯花园,沃尔特先生!”尼珀姑娘说,“劳驾您,帮个忙吧!”
“什么?”沃尔特喊道,“出了什么事了?”
“啊,沃尔特先生!斯塔格斯花园,劳驾您!”苏珊说。
“您瞧!”马车夫以一种兴高采烈与灰心绝望交织的神情,向沃尔特恳求道,“这位姑娘已经反反复复地说了老半天,她想要去的地方路走不通,我正想把车子转过身来找条出路呢。
乘坐过我马车的客人可多啦,可我从没见过像她这样的乘客。”
“您想到斯塔格斯花园去吗,苏珊?”沃尔特问道。
“对啦!她想到那里去。它在哪里?”马车夫抬高嗓门,粗声大气地说道。
“我不知道它在哪里!”苏珊疯狂似地大声说道,“沃尔特先生,我亲自到过那里一次,是带着弗洛伊小姐和我们可怜的、可爱的保罗少爷一起去的,就在您在城里找到弗洛伊小姐的那一天,因为在回来的路上我们把她丢了,理查兹大嫂和我,还有一条疯牛,还有理查兹大嫂的大儿子,虽然后来我去过那里,可是我却记不得它在哪里了,我想它已经塌陷到地底下去了。啊,沃尔特先生,别抛弃我不管,斯塔格斯花园,劳驾您!弗洛伊小姐最亲爱的宝贝——我们大家最亲爱的宝贝——、非常非常温顺的小保罗少爷啊!啊沃尔特先生!”
“慈善的上帝!”沃尔特喊道,“他病得很重吗?”“可爱的花朵儿!”苏珊绞扭着手哭道:“他一时想起想要看看他从前的奶妈,我就是来领她到他床边去