recognizant and reflective
among sundry minor alterations in mr carker's life and habits that began to take place at this time, none was more remarkable than the extraordinary diligence with which he applied himself to business, and the closeness with which he investigated every detail that the affairs of the house laid open to him. always active and penetrating in such matters, his lynx-eyed vigilance now increased twenty-fold. not only did his weary watch keep pace with every present point that every day presented to him in some new form, but in the midst of these engrossing occupations he found leisure - that is, he made it - to review the past transactions of the firm, and his share in them, during a long series of years. frequently when the clerks were all gone, the offices dark and empty, and all similar places of business shut up, mr carker, with the whole anatomy of the iron room laid bare before him, would explore the mysteries of books and papers, with the patient progress of a man who was dissecting the minutest nerves and fibres of his subject. perch, the messenger, who usually remained on these occasions, to entertain himself with the perusal of the price current by the light of one candle, or to doze over the fire in the outer office, at the imminent risk every moment of diving head foremost into the coal-box, could not withhold the tribute of his admiration from this zealous conduct, although it much contracted his domestic enjoyments; and again, and again, expatiated to mrs perch (now nursing twins) on the industry and acuteness of their managing gentleman in the city.
the same increased and sharp attention that mr carker bestowed on the business of the house, he applied to his own personal affairs. though not a partner in the concern - a distinction hitherto reserved solely to inheritors of the great name of dombey - he was in the receipt of some percentage on its dealings; and, participating in all its facilities for the employment of money to advantage, was considered, by the minnows among the tritons of the east, a rich man. it began to be said, among these shrewd observers, that jem carker, of dombey's, was looking about him to see what he was worth; and that he was calling in his money at a good time, like the long-headed fellow he was; and bets were even offered on the stock exchange that jem was going to marry a rich widow.
yet these cares did not in the least interfere with mr carker's watching of his chief, or with his cleanness, neatness, sleekness, or any cat-like quality he possessed. it was not so much that there was a change in him, in reference to any of his habits, as that the whole man was intensified. everything that had been observable in him before, was observable now, but with a greater amount of concentration. he did each single thing, as if he did nothing else - a pretty certain indication in a man of that range of ability and purpose, that he is doing something which sharpens and keeps alive his keenest powers.
the only decided alteration in him was, that as he rode to and fro along the streets, he would fall into deep fits of musing, like that in which he had come away from mr dombey's house, on the morning of that gentleman's disaster. at such times, he would keep clear of the obstacles in his way, mechanically; and would appear to see and hear nothing until arrival at his destination, or some sudden chance or effort roused him.
walking his white-legged horse thus, to the counting-house of dombey and son one day, he was as unconscious of the observation of two pairs of women's eyes, as of the fascinated orbs of rob the grinder, who, in waiting a street's length from the appointed place, as a demonstration of punctuality, vainly touched and retouched his hat to attract attention, and trotted along on foot, by his master's side, prepared to hold his stirrup when he should alight.
'see where he goes!' cried one of these two women, an old creature, who stretched out her shrivelled arm to point him out to her companion, a young woman, who stood close beside her, withdrawn like herself into a gateway.
mrs brown's daughter looked out, at this bidding on the part of mrs brown; and there were wrath and vengeance in her face.
'i never thought to look at him again,' she said, in a low voice; 'but it's well i should, perhaps. i see. i see!'
'not changed!' said the old woman, with a look of eager malice.
'he changed!' returned the other. 'what for? what has he suffered? there is change enough for twenty in me. isn't that enough?'
'see where he goes!' muttered the old woman, watching her daughter with her red eyes; 'so easy and so trim a-horseback, while we are in the mud.'
'and of it,' said her daughter impatiently. 'we are mud, underneath his horse's feet. what should we be?'
in the intentness with which she looked after him again, she made a hasty gesture with her hand when the old woman began to reply, as if her view could be obstructed by mere sound. her mother watching her, and not him, remained silent; until her kindling glance subsided, and she drew a long breath, as if in the relief of his being gone.
'deary!' said the old woman then. 'alice! handsome gall ally!' she gently shook her sleeve to arouse her attention. 'will you let him go like that, when you can wring money from him? why, it's a wickedness, my daughter.'
'haven't i told you, that i will not have money from him?' she returned. 'and don't you yet believe me? did i take his sister's money? would i touch a penny, if i knew it, that had gone through his white hands - unless it was, indeed, that i could poison it, and send it back to him? peace, mother, and come away.
'and him so rich?' murmured the old woman. 'and us so poor!'
'poor in not being able to pay him any of the harm we owe him,' returned her daughter. 'let him give me that sort of riches, and i'll take them from him, and use them. come away. its no good looking at his horse. come away, mother!'
but the old woman, for whom the spectacle of rob the grinder returning down the street, leading the riderless horse, appeared to have some extraneous interest that it did not possess in itself, surveyed that young man with the utmost earnestness; and seeming to have whatever doubts she entertained, resolved as he drew nearer, glanced at her daughter with brightened eyes and with her finger on her lip, and emerging from the gateway at the moment of his passing, touched him on the shoulder.
'why, where's my sprightly rob been, all this time!' she said, as he turned round.
the sprightly rob, whose sprightliness was very much diminished by the salutation, looked exceedingly dismayed, and said, with the water rising in his eyes:
'oh! why can't you leave a poor cove alone, misses brown, when he's getting an honest livelihood and conducting himself respectable? what do you come and deprive a cove of his character for, by talking to him in the streets, when he's taking his master's horse to a honest stable - a horse you'd go and sell for cats' and dogs' meat if you had your way! why, i thought,' said the grinder, producing his concluding remark as if it were the climax of all his injuries, 'that you was dead long ago!'
'this is the way,' cried the old woman, appealing to her daughter, 'that he talks to me, who knew him weeks and months together, my deary, and have stood his friend many and many a time among the pigeon-fancying tramps and bird-catchers.'
'let the birds be, will you, misses brown?' retorted rob, in a tone of the acutest anguish. 'i think a cove had better have to do with lions than them little creeturs, for they're always flying back in your face when you least expect it. well, how d'ye do and what do you want?' these polite inquiries the grinder uttered, as it were under protest, and with great exasperation and vindictiveness.
'hark how he speaks to an old friend, my deary!' said mrs brown, again appealing to her daughter. 'but there's some of his old friends not so patient as me. if i was to tell some that he knows, and has spotted and cheated with, where to find him - '
'will you hold your tongue, misses brown?' interrupted the miserable grinder, glancing quickly round, as though he expected to see his master's teeth shining at his elbow. 'what do you take a pleasure in ruining a cove for? at your time of life too! when you ought to be thinking of a variety of things!'
'what a gallant horse!' said the old woman, patting the animal's neck.
'let him alone, will you, misses brown?' cried rob, pushing away her hand. 'you're enough to drive a penitent cove mad!'
'why, what hurt do i do him, child?' returned the old woman.
'hurt?' said rob. 'he's got a master that would find it out if he was touched with a straw.' and he blew upon the place where the old woman's hand had rested for a moment, and smoothed it gently with his finger, as if he seriously believed what he said.
the old woman looking back to mumble and mouth at her daughter, who followed, kept close to rob's heels as he walked on with the bridle in his hand; and pursued the conversation.
'a good place, rob, eh?' said she. 'you're in luck, my child.'
'oh don't talk about luck, misses brown,' returned the wretched grinder, facing round and stopping. 'if you'd never come, or if you'd go away, then indeed a cove might be considered tolerable lucky. can't you go along, misses brown, and not foller me!' blubbered rob, with sudden defiance. 'if the young woman's a friend of yours, why don't she take you away, instead of letting you make yourself so disgraceful!'
'what!' croaked the old woman, putting her face close to his, with a malevolent grin upon it that puckered up the loose skin down in her very throat. 'do you deny your old chum! have you lurked to my house fifty times, and slept sound in a corner when you had no other bed but the paving-stones, and do you talk to me like this! have i bought and sold with you, and helped you in my way of business, schoolboy, sneak, and what not, and do you tell me to go along? could i raise a crowd of old company about you to-morrow morning, that would follow you to ruin like copies of your own shadow, and do you turn on me with your bold looks! i'll go. come, alice.'
'stop, misses brown!' cried the distracted grinder. 'what are you doing of? don't put yourself in a passion! don't let her go, if you please. i haven't meant any offence. i said "how d'ye do," at first, didn't i? but you wouldn't answer. how you do? besides,' said rob piteously, 'look here! how can a cove stand talking in the street with his master's prad a wanting to be took to be rubbed down, and his master up to every individgle thing that happens!'
the old woman made a show of being partially appeased, but shook her head, and mouthed and muttered still.
'come along to the stables, and have a glass of something that's good for you, misses brown, can't you?' said rob, 'instead of going on, like that, which is no good to you, nor anybody else. come along with her, will you be so kind?' said rob. 'i'm sure i'm delighted to see her, if it wasn't for the horse!'
with this apology, rob turned away, a rueful picture of despair, and walked his charge down a bye street' the old woman, mouthing at her daughter, followed close upon him. the daughter followed.
turning into a silent little square or court-yard that had a great church tower rising above it, and a packer's warehouse, and a bottle-maker's warehouse, for its places of business, rob the grinder delivered the white-legged horse to the hostler of a quaint stable at the corner; and inviting mrs brown and her daughter to seat themselves upon a stone bench at the gate of that establishment, soon reappeared from a neighbouring public-house with a pewter measure and a glass.
'here's master - mr carker, child!' said the old woman, slowly, as her sentiment before drinking. 'lord bless him!'
'why, i didn't tell you who he was,' observed rob, with staring eyes.
'we know him by sight,' said mrs brown, whose working mouth and nodding head stopped for the moment, in the fixedness of her attention. 'we saw him pass this morning, afore he got off his horse; when you were ready to take it.'
'ay, ay,' returned rob, appearing to wish that his readiness had carried him to any other place. - 'what's the matter with her? won't she drink?'
this inquiry had reference to alice, who, folded in her cloak, sat a little apart, profoundly inattentive to his offer of the replenished glass.
the old woman shook her head. 'don't mind her,' she said; 'she's a strange creetur, if you know'd her, rob. but mr carker
'hush!' said rob, glancing cautiously up at the packer's, and at the bottle-maker's, as if, from any one of the tiers of warehouses, mr carker might be looking down. 'softly.'
'why, he ain't here!' cried mrs brown.
'i don't know that,' muttered rob, whose glance even wandered to the church tower, as if he might be there, with a supernatural power of hearing.
'good master?' inquired mrs brown.
rob nodded; and added, in a low voice, 'precious sharp.'
'lives out of town, don't he, lovey?' said the old woman.
'when he's at home,' returned rob; 'but we don't live at home just now.'
'where then?' asked the old woman.
'lodgings; up near mr dombey's,' returned rob.
the younger woman fixed her eyes so searchingly upon him, and so suddenly, that rob was quite confounded, and offered the glass again, but with no more effect upon her than before.
'mr dombey - you and i used to talk about him, sometimes, you know,' said rob to mrs brown. 'you used to get me to talk about him.'
the old woman nodded.
'well, mr dombey, he's had a fall from his horse,' said rob, unwillingly; 'and my master has to be up there, more than usual, either with him, or mrs dombey, or some of 'em; and so we've come to town.'
'are they good friends, lovey?'asked the old woman.
'who?' retorted rob.
'he and she?'
'what, mr and mrs dombey?' said rob. 'how should i know!'
'not them - master and mrs dombey, chick,' replied the old woman, coaxingly.
'i don't know,' said rob, looking round him again. 'i suppose so. how curious you are, misses brown! least said, soonest mended.'
'why there's no harm in it!' exclaimed the old woman, with a laugh, and a clap of her hands. 'sprightly rob, has grown tame since he has been well off! there's no harm in it.
'no, there's no harm in it, i know,' returned rob, with the same distrustful glance at the packer's and the bottle-maker's, and the church; 'but blabbing, if it's only about the number of buttons on my master's coat, won't do. i tell you it won't do with him. a cove had better drown himself. he says so. i shouldn't have so much as told you what his name was, if you hadn't known it. talk about somebody else.'
as rob took another cautious survey of the yard, the old woman made a secret motion to her daughter. it was momentary, but the daughter, with a slight look of intelligence, withdrew her eyes from the boy's face, and sat folded in her cloak as before.
'rob, lovey!' said the old woman, beckoning him to the other end of the bench. 'you were always a pet and favourite of mine. now, weren't you? don't you know you were?'
'yes, misses brown,' replied the grinder, with a very bad grace.
'and you could leave me!' said the old woman, flinging her arms about his neck. 'you could go away, and grow almost out of knowledge, and never come to tell your poor old friend how fortunate you were, proud lad! oho, oho!'
'oh here's a dreadful go for a cove that's got a master wide awake in the neighbourhood!' exclaimed the wretched grinder. 'to be howled over like this here!'
'won't you come and see me, robby?' cried mrs brown. 'oho, won't you ever come and see me?'
'yes, i tell you! yes, i will!' returned the grinder.
'that's my own rob! that's my lovey!' said mrs brown, drying the tears upon her shrivelled face, and giving him a tender squeeze. 'at the old place, rob?'
'yes,' replied the grinder.
'soon, robby dear?' cried mrs brown; 'and often?'
'yes. yes. yes,' replied rob. 'i will indeed, upon my soul and body.'
'and then,' said mrs brown, with her arms uplifted towards the sky, and her head thrown back and shaking, 'if he's true to his word, i'll never come a-near him though i know where he is, and never breathe a syllable about him! never!'
this ejaculation seemed a drop of comfort to the miserable grinder, who shook mrs brown by the hand upon it, and implored her with tears in his eyes, to leave a cove and not destroy his prospects. mrs brown, with another fond embrace, assented; but in the act of following her daughter, turned back, with her finger stealthily raised, and asked in a hoarse whisper for some money.
'a shilling, dear!' she said, with her eager avaricious face, 'or sixpence! for old acquaintance sake. i'm so poor. and my handsome gal' - looking over her shoulder - 'she's my gal, rob - half starves me.
but as the reluctant grinder put it in her hand, her daughter, coming quietly back, caught the hand in hen, and twisted out the coin.
'what,' she said, 'mother! always money! money from the first, and to the last' do you mind so little what i said but now? here. take it!'
the old woman uttered a moan as the money was restored, but without in any other way opposing its restoration, hobbled at her daughter's side out of the yard, and along the bye street upon which it opened. the astonished and dismayed rob staring after them, saw that they stopped, and fell to earnest conversation very soon; and more than once observed a darkly threatening action of the younger woman's hand (obviously having reference to someone of whom they spoke), and a crooning feeble imitation of it on the part of mrs brown, that made him earnestly hope he might not be the subject of their discourse.
with the present consolation that they were gone, and with the prospective comfort that mrs brown could not live for ever, and was not likely to live long to trouble him, the grinder, not otherwise regretting his misdeeds than as they were attended with such disagreeable incidental consequences, composed his ruffled features to a more serene expression by thinking of the admirable manner in which he had disposed of captain cuttle (a reflection that seldom failed to put him in a flow of spirits), and went to the dombey counting house to receive his master's orders.
there his master, so subtle and vigilant of eye, that rob quaked before him, more than half expecting to be taxed with mrs brown, gave him the usual morning's box of papers for mr dombey, and a note for mrs dombey: merely nodding his head as an enjoinder to be careful, and to use dispatch - a mysterious admonition, fraught in the grinder's imagination with dismal warnings and threats; and more powerful with him than any words.
alone again, in his own room, mr carker applied himself to work, and worked all day. he saw many visitors; overlooked a number of documents; went in and out, to and from, sundry places of mercantile resort; and indulged in no more abstraction until the day's business was done. but, when the usual clearance of papers from his table was made at last, he fell into his thoughtful mood once more.
he was standing in his accustomed place and attitude, with his eyes intently fixed upon the ground, when his brother entered to bring back some letters that had been taken out in the course of the day. he put them quietly on the table, and was going immediately, when mr carker the manager, whose eyes had rested on him, on his entrance, as if they had all this time had him for the subject of their contemplation, instead of the office-floor, said:
'well, john carker, and what brings you here?'
his brother pointed to the letters, and was again withdrawing.
'i wonder,' said the manager, 'that you can come and go, without inquiring how our master is'.
'we had word this morning in the counting house, that mr dombey was doing well,' replied his brother.
'you are such a meek fellow,' said the manager, with a smile, - 'but you have grown so, in the course of years - that if any harm came to him, you'd be miserable, i dare swear now.'
'i should be truly sorry, james,' returned the other.
'he would be sorry!' said the manager, pointing at him, as if there were some other person present to whom he was appealing. 'he would be truly sorry! this brother of mine! this junior of the place, this slighted piece of lumber, pushed aside with his face to the wall, like a rotten picture, and left so, for heaven knows how many years he's all gratitude and respect, and devotion too, he would have me believe!'
'i would have you believe nothing, james,' returned the other. 'be as just to me as you would to any other man below you. you ask a question, and i answer it.'
'and have you nothing, spaniel,' said the manager, with unusual irascibility, 'to complain of in him? no proud treatment to resent, no insolence, no foolery of state, no exaction of any sort! what the devil! are you man or mouse?'
'it would be strange if any two persons could be together for so many years, especially as superior and inferior, without each having something to complain of in the other - as he thought, at all events, replied john carker. 'but apart from my history here - '
'his history here!' exclaimed the manager. 'why, there it is. the very fact that makes him an extreme case, puts him out of the whole chapter! well?'
'apart from that, which, as you hint, gives me a reason to be thankful that i alone (happily for all the rest) possess, surely there is no one in the house who would not say and feel at least as much. you do not think that anybody here would be indifferent to a mischance or misfortune happening to the head of the house, or anything than truly sorry for it?'
'you have good reason to be bound to him too!' said the manager, contemptuously. 'why, don't you believe that you are kept here, as a cheap example, and a famous instance of the clemency of dombey and son, redounding to the credit of the illustrious house?'
'no,' replied his brother, mildly, 'i have long believed that i am kept here for more kind and disinterested reasons.
'but you were going,' said the manager, with the snarl of a tiger-cat, 'to recite some christian precept, i observed.'
'nay, james,' returned the other, 'though the tie of brotherhood between us has been long broken and thrown away - '
'who broke it, good sir?' said the manager.
'i, by my misconduct. i do not charge it upon you.'
the manager replied, with that mute action of his bristling mouth, 'oh, you don't charge it upon me!' and bade him go on.
'i say, though there is not that tie between us, do not, i entreat, assail me with unnecessary taunts, or misinterpret what i say, or would say. i was only going to suggest to you that it would be a mistake to suppose that it is only you, who have been selected here, above all others, for advancement, confidence and distinction (selected, in the beginning, i know, for your great ability and trustfulness), and who communicate more freely with mr dombey than anyone, and stand, it may be said, on equal terms with him, and have been favoured and enriched by him - that it would be a mistake to suppose that it is only you who are tender of his welfare and reputation. there is no one in the house, from yourself down to the lowest, i sincerely believe, who does not participate in that feeling.'
'you lie!' said the manager, red with sudden anger. 'you're a hypocrite, john carker, and you lie.'
'james!' cried the other, flushing in his turn. 'what do you mean by these insulting words? why do you so basely use them to me, unprovoked?'
'i tell you,' said the manager, 'that your hypocrisy and meekness - that all the hypocrisy and meekness of this place - is not worth that to me,' snapping his thumb and finger, 'and that i see through it as if it were air! there is not a man employed here, standing between myself and the lowest in place (of whom you are very considerate, and with reason, for he is not far off), who wouldn't be glad at heart to see his master humbled: who does not hate him, secretly: who does not wish him evil rather than good: and who would not turn upon him, if he had the power and boldness. the nearer to his favour, the nearer to his insolence; the closer to him, the farther from him. that's the creed here!'
'i don't know,' said his brother, whose roused feelings had soon yielded to surprise, 'who may have abused your ear with such representations; or why you have chosen to try me, rather than another. but that you have been trying me, and tampering with me, i am now sure. you have a different manner and a different aspect from any that i ever saw m you. i will only say to you, once more, you are deceived.'
'i know i am,' said the manager. 'i have told you so.'
'not by me,' returned his brother. 'by your informant, if you have one. if not, by your own thoughts and suspicions.'
'i have no suspicions,' said the manager. 'mine are certainties. you pusillanimous, abject, cringing dogs! all making the same show, all canting the same story, all whining the same professions, all harbouring the same transparent secret.'
his brother withdrew, without saying more, and shut the door as he concluded. mr carker the manager drew a chair close before the fire, and fell to beating the coals softly with the poker.
'the faint-hearted, fawning knaves,' he muttered, with his two shining rows of teeth laid bare. 'there's not one among them, who wouldn't feign to be so shocked and outraged - ! bah! there's not one among them, but if he had at once the power, and the wit and daring to use it, would scatter dombey's pride and lay it low, as ruthlessly as i rake out these ashes.'
as he broke them up and strewed them in the grate, he looked on with a thoughtful smile at what he was doing. 'without the same queen beckoner too!' he added presently; 'and there is pride there, not to be forgotten - witness our own acquaintance!' with that he fell into a deeper reverie, and sat pondering over the blackening grate, until he rose up like a man who had been absorbed in a book, and looking round him took his hat and gloves, went to where his horse was waiting, mounted, and rode away through the lighted streets, for it was evening.
he rode near mr dombey's house; and falling into a walk as he approached it, looked up at the windows the window where he had once seen florence sitting with her dog attracted his attention first, though there was no light in it; but he smiled as he carried his eyes up the tall front of the house, and seemed to leave that object superciliously behind.
'time was,' he said, 'when it was well to watch even your rising little star, and know in what quarter there were clouds, to shadow you if needful. but a planet has arisen, and you are lost in its light.'
he turned the white-legged horse round the street corner, and sought one shining window from among those at the back of the house. associated with it was a certain stately presence, a gloved hand, the remembrance how the feathers of a beautiful bird's wing had been showered down upon the floor, and how the light white down upon a robe had stirred and rustled, as in the rising of a distant storm. these were the things he carried with him as he turned away again, and rode through the darkening and deserted parks at a quick rate.
in fatal truth, these were associated with a woman, a proud woman, who hated him, but who by slow and sure degrees had been led on by his craft, and her pride and resentment, to endure his company, and little by little to receive him as one who had the privilege to talk to her of her own defiant disregard of her own husband, and her abandonment of high consideration for herself. they were associated with a woman who hated him deeply, and who knew him, and who mistrusted him because she knew him, and because he knew her; but who fed her fierce resentment by suffering him to draw nearer and yet nearer to her every day, in spite of the hate she cherished for him. in spite of it! for that very reason; since in its depths, too far down for her threatening eye to pierce, though she could see into them dimly, lay the dark retaliation, whose faintest shadow seen once and shuddered at, and never seen again, would have been sufficient stain upon her soul.
did the phantom of such a woman flit about him on his ride; true to the reality, and obvious to him?
yes. he saw her in his mind, exactly as she was. she bore him company with her pride, resentment, hatred, all as plain to him as her beauty; with nothing plainer to him than her hatred of him. he saw her sometimes haughty and repellent at his side, and some times down among his horse's feet, fallen and in the dust. but he always saw her as she was, without disguise, and watched her on the dangerous way that she was going.
and when his ride was over, and he was newly dressed, and came into the light of her bright room with his bent head, soft voice, and soothing smile, he saw her yet as plainly. he even suspected the mystery of the gloved hand, and held it all the longer in his own for that suspicion. upon the dangerous way that she was going, he was, still; and not a footprint did she mark upon it, but he set his own there, straight'
这时候在卡克先生的生活与习惯中开始发生各种微小的变化,最引人注目的是,他异常勤勉地致力于公司的业务,并精心研究摆在他面前的公司各项交易的细节。他对这些事情本来一直是感觉灵敏、观察细致的,现在他的山猫眼睛般的警觉性又增加了二十倍。不仅仅是他疲累的眼睛密切注视着每天以某种新形式出现在他面前的当前的各种情况,而且他还从这些耗费精力的繁忙工作中找到闲暇时间(这是他设法挤出来的)来重新审查公司过去许多年中的交易以及他所参与的部分。时常,当公司的职员都走了,办公室黑暗无人,所有的业务机构也都已关闭了的时候,保险柜里的一切东西都像解剖开的身体一样摊开在卡克先生的面前,他则像一位医生正在仔细剖析他的病人的最微细的神经与纤维那样,耐心地探索着帐册与单据中的秘密。在这种情况下,信差珀奇先生通常留在外面的办公室中,在一支蜡烛的亮光下,阅读行市表消遣,或者对着炉火打瞌睡,每分钟都可能发生头向下撞进煤箱里去的危险。虽然这大大地缩短了他家庭娱乐的时间,但他对卡克先生这种热心工作的表现却不能不大加赞扬。他向珀奇太太(她现在抚养着一对双胞胎)一遍又一遍地详细谈论着他们城里经理先生的勤勉与精明。
卡克先生以对待公司业务同样增强的、敏锐的注意力来处理他的个人事务。他虽然不是公司的合伙人(迄今为止,只有董贝这个伟大姓氏的继承人才能享有这个光荣的称号),但他从它的交易中收取一定的佣金;而且,他还参与公司的有利的投资活动,所以在东方贸易业巨鲸四周的小鱼儿们都把他看成是一位阔老。机灵的观察者们开始谈论,董贝公司的杰姆·卡克在计算他的资本;他是个聪明人,正在合适的时候收回他的钱;在证券交易所里甚至有人打赌说,杰姆将要娶一位有钱的寡妇。
不过这些丝毫也不妨碍卡克先生侍候他的老板,也丝毫不妨碍他保持干净、整洁、圆滑或任何猫般的特性。与其说他的习惯有什么变化,还不如说他整个人比过去更精练了。在他身上过去可以看到的一切东西,现在仍然可以看得到,只是现在表现得更为集中罢了。他做每件事情的时候,就仿佛他不做任何其他的事情似的;——对一位具有这样能力与意图的人来说,这相当明确地表明,他正在做某件事情来磨练与激励他最敏锐的才能。
他的唯一显著的变化是,当他骑着马在街上来来去去的时候,他深深地陷入沉思之中,就像董贝先生遭到不幸的那天早上,他从那位先生家里走出来时的情形一样。在这种时候,他不假思索地自动避开路上的一切障碍物,好像什么也没有看见,什么也没有听见,一直到达目的地为止,除非突然发生什么意外的事情或突然需要作出什么努力,才能使他从沉思中惊醒过来。
有一天他这样骑着他的白腿的马,向董贝父子公司的办公室行进的时候,他既没有留意到两位女人的眼睛在注视着他,也没有留意到磨工罗布为了表明他严守时间,正在离指定地点更近一条街的地方等候着他,圆圆的眼睛正被他吸引住;罗布徒劳地一次又一次把手举到帽檐向他行礼,以便吸引他的注意,然后在他主人身旁急匆匆地走着,准备在他下马的时候立即抓住马蹬。
“看,他骑过去了!”这两位女人当中的一位喊道;她是一位老太婆,伸出满是皱纹的手,把他指给她的同伴看;她的同伴是一位年轻女人,站在她的身旁,跟他一样退避到一个门道里。
布朗太太的女儿沿着布朗太太指点的方向望出去,脸上露出愤怒与渴望报仇的神色。
“我从来没有想到会再见到他,”她低声说道;“不过也许我见到他是件好事。我看到了。我看到了!”
“样子没有变化!”老太婆十分怨恨地看了一眼,说道。
“他变化!”另外一位回答道。“为什么会变化?他受过什么苦吗?我一个人的变化抵得上二十个人的。难道这还不够吗?”
“看,他往那里骑过去了!”老太婆用发红的眼睛注视着她的女儿,嘟囔着说道,“那么悠闲自在,那么整洁漂亮,还骑着马,而我们却站在污泥里——”
“而且是从污泥里出来的,”她的女儿不耐烦地说道,“我们是他马蹄下的污泥。我们还能是什么?”
她又用全神贯注的眼光从后面望着他;当老太婆想要回答的时候,她急忙摇摇手,仿佛连也会阻挡她的视线似的。她的母亲注视着她,而没有注视他,并保持着沉默,直到后来那冒着火星的眼睛平静下来了,她又深深地吸了一口气,仿佛由于看不到他而感到安慰似的。
“宝贝!”这时候老太婆说道。“艾丽斯!漂亮的女儿!艾丽!”她慢慢地摇摆着她的袖子来引起她的注意。“你是能从他那里敲出钱来的呀,你就让他那样过去吗?唔,这是罪恶,我的女儿。”
“难道我没有告诉过你,我不要他的钱吗?”她回答道。
“难道你到现在还不相信我吗?我曾接受过他姐姐的钱了吗?如果我知道有什么钱通过他雪白的手送来的,难道我会去摸一个便士吗?除非我能在上面涂上毒药,再送还给他!别说了,妈妈,我们离开这里吧。”
“让他那么有钱?”老太婆嘟囔着,“而我们就这么穷苦可怜!”
“我们可怜,是由于他给我们造成了伤害,而我们却不能对他报仇雪恨;”女儿回答道,“让他给我那种财富吧,我将从他那里取得它并使用它。走吧,看他的马没有用。走吧,妈妈!”
但是老太婆这时看到磨工罗布牵着没有人骑着的马,沿着街道回来,她好像产生了超出这件事情本身的某种兴趣,非常认真地打量着这位年轻人。当他走近的时候,她好像要解决心头的什么疑问似的,用炯炯有神的眼睛看了她女儿一眼,并把一个指头贴在嘴唇上;当他正从这里经过的时候,她从门道里走出来,碰了一下他的肩膀。
“喂,我活泼的罗布这些时候都在哪里呀?”他回过头来时候,她问道。
活泼的罗布听到这个问候,减少了不少活泼,表现出十分惊愕的样子,眼中含着泪水,说道:
“啊,布朗太太,一个可怜的小伙子正在规规矩矩地挣钱过活,体体面面地做人,您为什么不让他平平静静地过日子,不去打搅他呢?他正把他主人的马牵到一个规矩可靠的马厩去,您为什么跑过来,在街道上跟他讲话,败坏他的名声呢?——这匹马要是由您去处理的话,您是会把它卖掉,再买肉来喂猫喂狗的!哎呀,我还以为,”磨工说了一句结尾的话,仿佛他所受的一切委屈已到达顶点似的,“您老早以前就已死掉了呢!”
“我亲爱的,”老太婆向她的女儿大声哀诉道,“我认识他已有好多个星期、好多个月了;有好多次,那些卖鸽子的流浪者和捉鸽子的人欺负他,都是我帮助了他,可是他现在竟这样对我说话!”
“让那些鸟儿安安静静,别去打扰它们吧,好不好,布朗太太?”罗布用极度痛苦的声调反驳道,“我想,一个年轻小伙子最好是跟狮子打交道,而不要去跟这些小东西打交道,因为它们常常会在您最意想不到的时候飞回到您的脸上来。唔,您好吗?您需要什么?”罗布说出这些有礼貌的话,仿佛是极不愿意,极为激愤和怨恨似的。
“你听,我的宝贝,他是怎样跟一位老朋友讲话的!”布朗太太又向她女儿哀诉道,“但是他有几位老朋友可不像我这么耐性。如果我去告诉几个他认识、他曾经跟他们玩乐,并欺骗过他们的朋友,到哪里去找到他的话——”
“您住嘴好不好,布朗太太?”可怜的磨工打断她的话,说道,一边迅速地向四周看了一眼,仿佛预料会在近旁看到他的主人的牙齿正在闪发出亮光似的,“您想毁掉一个年轻小伙子来取乐,这是为什么呢?像您这样岁数的人,本应该想各种各样事情的,为什么还要这样呢?”
“多么雄壮的马!”老太婆拍拍马背,说道。
“别去动他好不好,布朗太太?”罗布把她的手推开,大声喊道,“您真要把一位悔过自新的年轻小伙子逼得发疯了!”
“嘿,我伤害它什么啦,孩子?”老太婆回答道。
“伤害?”罗布说道,“您就是用稻草碰它一下,它的主人也能发觉。”他把老太婆的手碰过的地方吹了吹,用手指轻轻地把它抚平,仿佛他当真相信他所说的话似的。
老太婆回头望了望跟随在后面的女儿,向她嘀咕了一句并歪歪嘴巴;当罗布手里拿着缰绳继续向前走去的时候,她紧紧跟在他的后面,继续和他交谈。
“你有了个好差使了,罗布,是不是?”她说道,“你走运了,我的孩子。”
“唉,别谈走运了,布朗太太,”可怜的磨工左顾右盼,停住脚步,回答道,“如果您没有遇见我,或者如果您走开的话,那么,说实在的,一位年轻小伙子可以说是相当走运了。您离开我吧,布朗太太,别在我后面跟着!”罗布突然反抗地哇哇大哭起来,“如果那位年轻的女人是您的一位朋友的话,那么她为什么不把您领开,而让您这样丢脸呢!”
“什么!”老太婆用哭丧的说道,一边把脸凑近他的脸,对它龇牙咧嘴地笑了笑,她脖子上松弛的皮肤都因而往下垂挂着了。“你竟翻脸不认你的老朋友了!过去当你除了石砌的道路,找不到别的床铺的时候,难道你不曾五十次偷偷地躲藏在我家里,在角落里呼呼大睡吗?现在你竟居然这样对我这样说话!难道我过去不曾跟你一道去买卖,还帮助你这小学生偷偷地逃学,还有什么我不曾做过的,而你现在竟居然叫我走开!难道我不能在明天早上把你过去的一群伙伴召集起来,像你的许多影子一样,跟随着你,把你彻底搞垮吗?你现在竟居然放肆无礼地看着我!我就走。艾丽斯,我们走吧!”
“站住,布朗太太!”心烦意乱的磨工喊道,“您这是干什么来着?您别生气!请别让她走。我完全不想冒犯您。我开头的时候不是对您说过,‘您好吗?’是不是?可是您不愿意回答。您好吗?还有一点,”罗布可怜巴巴地说道,“请听我说!一位年轻小伙子需要把他主人的马牵去洗刷干净,而他的主人又是个什么丁点小事都能觉察出来的人,这时他怎么能站在街上跟人讲话呢?”
老太婆装出稍稍息怒的样子,但仍然摇着头,歪着嘴巴,嘟囔着。
“跟我到马厩去,喝一杯对您身体有益的东西,好不好,布朗太太?”罗布说道,“不要像现在这样闲荡着,那对您,对其他任何人都没有好处。您肯不肯跟她一道跟我来?”罗布说道,“说真的,要不是有这匹马的话,我真高兴见到她!”
罗布这样赔了礼之后,拐了一个弯,牵着马沿着一条小街走去,这时他那神态真是一幅悲观绝望的悲惨图景。老太婆向她女儿歪歪嘴,紧紧跟在他后面。女儿随后跟着。
他们转进一个寂静的小广场,或者说得正确些,一个院子里。一座雄伟的教堂钟楼巍然耸立在这里,还有一个包装作坊的仓库和一个酒瓶厂的仓库也坐落在这里。磨工罗布把那匹白腿的马交给院子角落里一所旧式马厩的马夫,请布朗太太和她的女儿坐在马厩门口的石长凳上,不久他就从邻近的酒吧里出来,拿着一只白镴的酒壶和一只酒杯。
“孩子,为你的主人卡克先生的健康干杯!”老太婆在喝酒之前慢吞吞地说出她的祝愿。“天主保佑他!”
“怎么!我以前没跟您说过我的主人是谁啊?”罗布眼睛张得大大地说道。
“我们认得他,”布朗太太说道,她专心致志地注视着他,连她那动作着的嘴巴和摇晃着的脑袋也暂停了片刻。“我们今天早上看到他从我们身边经过,后来他下了马,你在那里等着把它牵走。”
“是的,是的,”罗布回答道,好像后悔没有在任何别的地方等候他似的。——“她怎么了?她为什么不喝?”
这个问题是指艾丽斯而提出的。她紧裹在斗篷里,坐在稍稍离开一点的地方,对他递上来的重新斟满的酒杯丝毫也不理会。
老太婆摇摇头。“别管她,”她说道;“如果你了解她的话,你就会知道她是个古怪的人,罗布。可是卡克先生——”
“别作声!”罗布说道,一边偷偷地朝包装作坊的仓库和酒瓶厂的仓库张望,仿佛卡克先生可能会从这些仓库的任何一排房屋中往这边窥视似的。“说得轻一点。”
“唔,他不在这里!”布朗太太喊道。
“我不知道这,”罗布嘟囔道,他甚至朝教堂钟楼看了一眼,仿佛具有超自然听觉的卡克先生可能躲藏在那里似的。
“他是一位好主人吧?”布朗太太问道。
罗布点点头,又低声补充了一句,“非常精明厉害。”
“他住在城外,是不是,亲爱的孩子?”老太婆问道。
“当他在家里的时候,他是住在城外,”罗布回答道,“可是我们现在不住在家里。”
“那么住在哪里呢?”老太婆问道。
“住在一栋出租的房屋里,跟董贝先生的家很挨近的,”罗布回答道。
年轻的女人眼睛那么锐利地、那么突然地注视着他,弄得罗布十分惊慌失措;他又向她递过酒杯,但跟先前一样没有成功。
“董贝先生——您知道,有时候,您和我常常谈到他,”罗布对布朗太太说道,“您过去常常想法让我谈到他。”
老太婆点点头。
“唔,董贝先生,他从马上摔下来了,”罗布不愿意地说道,“我的主人不得不比往常更多次地到那里去,不是跟他在一起,就是跟董贝夫人在一起,再不就是跟他们当中的什么人在一起,所以我们就搬到城里去住了。”
“他们是不是好朋友,亲爱的孩子?”老太婆问道。
“谁?”罗布反问道。
“他跟她?”
“什么,董贝先生跟董贝夫人吗?”罗布说道,“这我怎么能知道!”
“不是说他们,小宝宝,我是说你的主人跟董贝夫人,”老太婆哄着他,回答道。
“我不知道,”罗布又向四周看看,说道,“我猜想是这样。
您的好奇心多重呵,布朗太太!言多必失,少说为好。”
“哎呀,这没有什么害处!”老太婆大笑了一声,拍了一拍手,高声说道,“活泼的罗布走运之后变得驯服了!这没有什么害处。”
“是的,我知道,这没有什么害处,”罗布回答道,一边像先前一样怀疑地看了看包装作坊的仓库、酒瓶工厂的仓库和教堂的钟楼;“但是决不能泄漏秘密,哪怕只是谈谈我主人上衣的钮扣也不行。我告诉您,这种事他是不容许的。要不然,一位年轻小伙子还不如把自己淹死更好一些。他就是这样说的。如果您不知道的话,我连他的名字也不会告诉您。让我们谈谈别的什么人吧。”
当罗布又小心翼翼地向院子里察看的时候,老太婆暗地里向她女儿作了个示意的动作,这是一刹那的工夫,但是她的女儿表示领会,就把眼光从孩子的脸上移回,像先前一样紧裹在她的斗篷里。
“罗布,亲爱的!”老太婆招呼他在长凳的另一端坐下。
“你过去是我宠爱的宝贝孩子。是的,可不是这样吗?难道你不知道你过去是这样的吗?”
“我知道,布朗太太,”磨工很勉强地回答道。
“可是你却能忍心把我抛弃!”老太婆用胳膊搂着他的脖子,说道,“你却能忍心离开我,躲藏得几乎无影无踪,也从来不跟你的老朋友说说你已交了多么好的运气,你这个骄傲的孩子呀!嗬嗬,嗬嗬!”
“唉,一位年轻的小伙子在这里这样嚎啕大哭着,而他的主人就在附近留神瞧着,这对他是多么可怕的事啊!”不幸的磨工高声喊道。
“你以后不来看看我吗,罗贝?”布朗太太喊道,“嗬嗬,你以后就一次也不来看看我吗?”
“会来看您的,我告诉您!是的,我会来的!”磨工回答道。
“这才是我的好罗布啊!这才是我的好宝宝啊!”布朗太太说道,一边擦干她干瘪的脸上的眼泪,亲切地紧抱着他。
“还是到老地方来吧,罗布?”
“行,”磨工回答道。
“不久就来,亲爱的罗贝?”布朗太太喊道;“而且经常来?”
“行。行。是的,”罗布回答说,“以我的灵魂和肉体发誓,我一定来。”
“既然是这样,”布朗太太把手举向天空,把头往后一仰,并摇晃着,“虽然我知道他住在哪里,但如果他信守他的诺言的话,那么我就不到他那里去,而且我一个字也决不会谈到他!决不会!”
这声喊叫对可怜的磨工似乎是一丝安慰,他握握布朗太太的手,眼里含着泪水,请求她别去打扰一位年轻小伙子,别去破坏他的前程。布朗太太又亲热地拥抱了他一次,表示同意;但是当她正要跟女儿离开的时候,她又转过身来,偷偷地举起一个指头,用嘶哑的凑着他的耳朵,求他给一点钱。
“一先令,亲爱的!”她露出急切的、贪婪的脸色,说道,“要不六便士也行!看在老熟人的面子上。我是这么穷。而我漂亮的女儿,”——她回过头去望了望——“她是我的女儿,罗布,她让我过着半饥半饱的生活。”
可是当罗布勉勉强强地把钱塞到她手里的时候,她的女儿却悄悄地转过身来,抓住她的手,把钱币从她手中抢出来。
“什么,”她说道,“妈妈!老是钱!开头是钱,到最后还是钱。我刚才讲过的话你怎么一点也不记在心上?钱在这里。
拿回去吧!”
当钱归还原主的时候,老太婆哀叹了一声,但没有阻拦,然后挨着她女儿的身旁,一拐一拐地走出院子,沿着邻近的一条小街走去。万分惊讶的罗布目不转睛地看着她们离开,他看到她们很快就站住,认真地交谈起来;他不止一次地注意到年轻女人的手凶狠地作了一个威胁的动作(显然是针对她们所谈到的一个什么人),布朗太太也有气无力地模仿了一下这个动作,因而他不由得衷心地希望,她们所谈论的对象不是他。
罗布想到她们现在已经走了,又想到布朗太太将来不能永久活下去,很可能不久就不会来打扰他了,心中感到一些安慰;他对过去的过错会随着带来这些不愉快的后果,心中倒也因此而感到有些悔恨,但是他想到他是怎样巧妙地摆脱了卡特尔船长的(他一回忆起这件事,就必然能使精神焕发起来),这就使他把受了扰乱的心绪镇静下来,换上一副平静的面容,到董贝公司的营业所去接受他主人的吩咐。
他的主人在那里,眼睛是那么敏锐,那么警觉,因此罗布一看到它们,就在他面前颤抖起来,十分担心布朗太太的事情会使他受到责骂;他的主人像往常一样,交给他一个匣子和一张短笺;匣子里装着上午的公文,是送给董贝先生的;那张短笺是送给董贝夫人的;他只是向他点了点头,算是嘱咐他要谨慎小心,并必须火速送达——这样一种神秘的告诫,在磨工看来,充满了可怕的警告与威胁,它比任何言语都更有力。
房间里只剩下卡克先生一个人的时候,他又专心致志地工作起来,工作了一整天。他接见了不少来访者,审阅了许多文件,在各种商业场所进进出出,来来往往,在一天的业务没有做完之前,他从不分心走神。但是,当他桌子上的公文终于办完送走以后,他又一次陷入沉思之中。
当他以惯常的姿势站在惯常的地方,眼睛全神贯注地凝视着地板的时候,他的哥哥进来把这一天中间从这里取走的一些函件送回。在他进来的时候,经理卡克先生的眼睛注视着他,仿佛它们在这段时间里一直静观着的不是办公室的地板,而是他似的;当他默默地把函件放在桌子上,想立刻就走开的时候,经理卡克先生说道:
“唔,约翰·卡克,是什么使你到这里来的?”
他的哥哥指指函件,然后又向门口走去。
“我感到奇怪,”经理说道,“你来来去去,连我们主人的健康情况怎么样也可以不问一问。”
“今天早上我们在办公室里听说,董贝先生的身体恢复得不错,”他的哥哥回答道。
“你是这样一位卑躬屈节的人,”经理微笑了一下,说道,——“不过,在这些岁月中你已变成了这样子——,我现在敢发誓说,如果他遭到什么灾祸的话,那么你是会感到悲伤的。”
“我一定会真正感到难过,詹姆斯,”那一位回答道。
“他会感到难过!”经理指着他说道,仿佛他正在向这里另一个人求助似的。“他会真正感到难过!我的这位哥哥!这位这里的小职员,这块谁也看不起的废物,他被人们推在一旁,脸朝着墙壁,就像是一张拙劣的图画一样!他就一直是这样,天知道过了多少年;可是他对他却非常感激、尊敬与忠诚,而且想要我相信这一点!”
“我什么也不想要你相信,詹姆士,”另一位回答道。“请像对待你的其他任何下属那样公正地对待我吧。你向我提了一个问题,我只不过回答它罢了。”
“你这条摇尾乞怜的狗,对他就没有什么抱怨的吗?”经理以寻常少见的易怒的脾气,说道,“难道就没有盛气凌人的态度、蛮横无礼的行为、愚笨无知的状态、吹毛求疵的挑剔,使你怨恨的吗?见你的鬼!你是人还是耗子?”
“任何两个人,特别是上级和下级,如果相处这么多年,彼此没有一点怨言,这倒是奇怪的——不管怎么样,他是这么想的,”约翰·卡克回答道,“不过,撇开我的历史不提——”
“他的历史!”经理高声喊道,“哦,确有这么回事。这件事实本身使他成了一种特殊情况,因此就可以把他的一切全都一笔勾销!唔,往下讲吧。”
“我的这段历史,正像你所暗示的,使我具有独特的理由对他怀着感激的心情(其他的人很幸运,没有像我这样的理由),可是把这段历史撇开不提,公司里也确实没有一个人不是这样说和这样感觉的。难道你不认为这里有什么人对公司老板遭遇的不幸或灾祸会漠不关心或会对这不真正感到难过的吗?”
“当然,你有充分的理由对他感恩戴德!”经理轻蔑地说道。“唷,难道你不相信,把你留在这里是作为一个廉价的实例和著名的证据,说明董贝父子公司待人处事宽厚,因而有助于抬高这个大名鼎鼎的公司的美好声望吗?”
“我不相信,”他的哥哥温和地回答道,“很久以来我一直相信,是由于更为仁慈和无私的理由才把我留下来的。”
“我看你好像要背诵一段基督的什么训诫吧,”经理像山猫般咆哮道。
“不是,詹姆士,”另一位回答道,“虽然我们之间兄弟情谊的纽带早已断裂,并已被抛弃了——”
“谁断裂的,亲爱的先生?”经理问道。
“我,由于我的行为不正。我不把过失推到你身上。”
经理咬牙切齿,无声地回答道,“哼,你不把过失推到我身上!”然后嘱咐他继续说下去。
“我说,虽然我们之间已不存在兄弟情谊的纽带,我请求你不要用不必要的辱骂来攻击我,或者曲解我所说的或想要说的话,我只想向你提醒一点:如果你以为,你在这里远远超出所有其他的人,得到提拔,受到信任,享受荣誉(我知道,从一开始,你就是由于你的卓越才能和可以信赖而得到提拔的),你比任何人都能更随便地跟董贝先生交往,可以说,跟他保持着平等的关系,受到他的宠幸,由于他而发财致富,因此,公司里只有你一个人才关心他的幸福与名誉,如果你这样想的话,那么这将是一个错误。我真诚地相信,公司里,从你开始一直到职位最低的人,没有一个人不同样有着这样的感情。”
“你撒谎!”经理说道,他由于突然发怒,脸孔涨得通红。
“你是个伪君子,约翰·卡克,你说的是弥天大谎。”
“詹姆士,”另一位喊道,他的脸也涨红了。“你使用这些侮辱的语言打算干什么?我没惹你一丝一毫,你为什么这样卑鄙地对我使用这些语言?”
“我告诉你,”经理说道,“你的虚情假意与卑躬屈膝,公司里所有职员的虚情假意与卑躬屈膝,都不值得我那样做,”他咬咬大姆指,又咬咬别的指头,“我看透这一切,就像看透清澈的空气一样!这个公司所雇用的所有职员,在我与最低级职员之间的所有的人(你对他们很体贴,而且有理由这样,因为你的地位与他们相差不远),没有一个人看到他的主人受到屈辱会不由衷地感到高兴,没有一个人不暗地里恨他,没有一个人不希望他遭到灾祸而不是交上好运,没有一个人要是有力量和勇气的话会不反抗他的。愈是受到他宠幸的人就愈感受到他的蛮横无礼;愈接近他的人就愈疏远他。这就是这里所有职员们的信念!”
我不知道,”他的哥哥说道,他刚才被惹怒的感情立即被惊奇所代替,“谁用这样一些说法糟蹋你的耳朵的?为什么你偏想要来考验我而不去考验别人?不过你已经考验了我,愚弄了我,这一点我现在深信不疑。你刚才的态度和言论,跟我过去在你身上看到的截然不同。我只能再一次对你说,你被欺骗了。”
“我知道我是被欺骗了,”经理说道,“我已经对你说过了。”
“不是被我,”他的哥哥回答道。“而是被向你提供情况的人欺骗了,如果有这样的人的话;如果没有这样的人,那就是被你自己的想法和怀疑所欺骗了。”
“我没有任何怀疑,”经理说道。“我掌握千真万确的事实。你们这些胆小如鼠、卑鄙下贱、卑躬曲膝的狗!你们全都假装成同样的姿态,全都编造着同样的假话,全都哭诉着同样的话语,全都隐藏着同样显而易见的秘密。”
当他说完的时候,他的哥哥不再说什么,离开房间,把门关上,经理卡克先生把椅子拉近到壁炉跟前,开始用拨火棒轻轻地敲打着煤块。
“懦怯怕事、阿谀奉迎的无赖们,”他露出两排闪闪发光的牙齿,喃喃自语道,“他们没有一个人不假装出震惊与气愤的——!呸!他们只要一旦有了权势和使用权势的才智与胆量的话,那么就没有一个人不会把董贝的高傲摧毁、打倒,就像我耙出这些煤渣一样毫不留情的。”
当他把它们敲碎、撒在炉篦上的时候,他露出若有所思的微笑,看着自己所干的事情。“是的,即使没有王后的引诱也会这样的!”他立即补充了一句;“有一种高傲是不应当忘记的——它是我们相识的见证人!”说着,他就陷入了更为出神的沉思,坐在那里,对着正在暗黑下去的炉篦默想着,随后像一个人离开专心看着的书本一样地站了起来,向四周看看,拿了帽子和手套,走到他的马正在等候他的地方,骑上马,沿着灯光明亮的街道骑去,因为这时已是晚上了。
他骑近董贝先生的住宅;快到的时候,他勒住马,让马放慢脚步,一步一步地走着,同时望着上面的窗子。有一次他曾看到弗洛伦斯带着她的狗坐在里面的那个窗子首先吸引了他的注意,虽然这时里面已没有灯光了;可是当他把眼光投到这座公馆高大的正面的时候,他微笑了,似乎目空一切地把那窗子抛在后面。
“过去有一段时候,”他说道,“甚至连您这颗升起的小星也是值得注视的,而且还得知道乌云聚集在什么地方,以便在需要的时候好去掩护您。可是现在一颗行星升上来了,在它的光辉中您已经黯然失色了。”
他把白腿的马转到街道拐角处,从这座公馆背面的许多窗子中寻找一个闪射出亮光的窗子。这个窗子使他联想起那庄严的态度,那戴上手套的手,也使他回想起那只美丽的鸟儿的翅膀上的羽毛怎样纷纷落到地板上,长衣上那轻飘飘的白色绒毛怎样颤抖着,发出沙沙的,就像面临即将刮起的风暴一样。当他又转身离开,以快速的步伐骑过公园的黑暗的、无人的小路的时候,他带走了这些回忆。
不可避免的事实是,这些回忆都跟一位女人,一位高傲的女人联系着;她憎恨他,但是由于他采取了狡猾的手腕,也由于她怀着高傲与怨恨的情绪,她被慢慢地而又确实地引导到习惯于容忍他跟她在一起相处了;她逐渐地习惯于把他当作一位有特殊权利的人来接待,他有权向她谈到她对她自己丈夫无礼的轻蔑和她自暴自弃地轻视自己。这些回忆跟一位女人联系着;她深切地憎恨他,她了解他,并正因为她了解他和因为他了解她,所以她不信任他;可是尽管她对他怀着憎恨,她却容许他一天天地接近她,以便激起她强烈的怨恨。尽管她对他怀着憎恨!正是由于这个理由她才容许他一天天地接近她的;因为在这憎恨的深渊(它太深了,虽然她能模糊地向里面探视,但却不是她的威胁性的眼光所能看透的)隐藏着她狠毒的报复,它的最淡弱的影子足以玷污她的灵魂;只要看一次就会令人毛骨悚然,决不会再去看的。
当他骑马的时候,这女人的幻影,这与真实完全一致、他看得明明白白的幻影,是不是在他的周围飞翔呢?
是的。他在心中看到她,一如她平时的样子。她容忍他跟她在一起的时候,在他眼中,她那高傲、怨恨、憎恶的情绪,就像她美丽的容貌一样清清楚楚。没有什么能比她对他的憎恨更为清楚的了。他有时看到她在他身旁态度傲慢,拒人于千里之外;有时又看到她摔倒在他的马蹄下,躺在尘土中。但是他总是看到她,就像她平时的样子,没有任何掩饰,而且注视着她在向着危险的道路上走去。
当他骑马游逛之后,换上衣服,低着头,露出谄媚的微笑,轻声柔语地走进她的明亮的房间里的时候,他同样清楚地看到她。他甚至对那戴上手套的手的秘密产生了猜疑,正由于这个猜疑,他把它在他手中握得比以前更久一些。他依旧跟随着她在危险的道路上走去,她所留下的每个脚印,他都把自己的脚紧跟着踩在上面。