“who like an april morn appears,
sunshine and rain, hopes clouded o’er with fears,
pleased and displeased by starts, in passion warm,
in reason weak.”
—churchill.
now, whether it was due to the kitchen fire or to the war fever, it would be hard to say, but mrs. durdle on that cool september morning gasped with heat, and as she digested the news of the powick fight and put her pastry into the oven, she hailed with relief any excuse for leaving her domain.
“i’ll see how they young folk be getting on with the apricots,” she said to herself, wiping her hot face and setting her cap straight. “there’ll be more lommaking than stoning, an i’m not mistaken. and, lord love ’em! they do make a fine, handsome couple, nobody can’t deny it.”
she had just bustled out into the passage when, to her astonishment, she saw gabriel harford closing the door of the still-room behind him, with a face which had suddenly lost all its boyishness. haggard and pale, with wide eyes that seemed to see nothing of his surroundings, he strode by the housekeeper and passed rapidly down the garden path.
mrs. durdle stood quite still, staring after him.
“lack-a-day!” she cried. “now what should that bode? he passed me by and never so much as saw me—me that am of a pertly presence, and was never overlooked before in all my born days. save us! but’tis clear as day they have had their first quarrel—that is, their first lovers’ quarrel, for they was always at it like hammer and tongs as children, bless ’em, though their greatest punishment was to be apart.”
the next question was—who should make the peace? they were now past the days of cuffing and scolding; indeed, durdle fairly quaked at the thought of addressing either of them, and feeling that discretion was the better part of valour, she stole on tip-toe to the still-room door, and made careful and noiseless preparation to look through the keyhole. first, she hitched up her gown, then, supporting herself by the doorpost, she slowly lowered her massive form on to one knee and, crouching forward, applied a sharp, twinkling, little grey eye to the keyhole.
alas! the apricots were pushed aside, and hilary, with her face hidden, was sobbing in that silent, restrained fashion which always alarmed the housekeeper.
to get up from her crouching posture without making a sound was even harder than the descent had proved. however, durdle valiantly gripped both doorposts, and with a tremendous effort heaved herself on to her feet, and tiptoed across the hall to the dining-room.
“oh, ma’am! do pray come to mistress hilary,” she exclaimed, addressing poor mrs. unett in the most startling fashion. “she is crying her heart out alone, and mr. gabriel he’s gone off with a face the colour of a monument and eyes as big as egg-cups, and i am certain sure that they have had a desperate quarrel.”
“say nothing to anybody else, durdle,” said mrs. unett, hurriedly rising, and making her way with an anxious face to the still-room.
hilary sprang to her feet as the door opened, and became engrossed in the withered rose petals on the window-sill.
“when shall we make the pot pourri, ma’am?” she said with averted face.
but mrs. unett was not to be deceived or repulsed. she put her arm about the girl, and gently turned the tear-stained face to her own, kissing her daughter without a word.
that was more than hilary’s pride could withstand, she sank down on her knees and clung to her mother, sobbing anew.
“it’s all over,” she said, piteously; “i have been quite—quite deceived. oh, mother! he has sided with the parliament.”
“we might have expected it, after all,” said mrs. unett; “for his father hath ever inclined to that side, yet i never thought—never dreamt that if it actually came to war he could be disloyal.”
“oh, he has some fine arguing about being faithful to the great charter,” said hilary, bitterly. “but i told him i would never love a rebel—and i bid him choose between me and the country.”
“and he?” said mrs. unett.
“he chose the country, and i said i would see him no more,” said hilary, with a rush of tears.
little by little mrs. unett gathered most of what had passed, and her kindly heart was rent with conflicting feelings. after all, gabriel had spoken truly when he said their love could not really be touched by any matters of state; hilary was too young to understand the full truth of that thought. and yet, in spite of all, how could the bishop give her in marriage to one agreeing with those who had just turned the bishops out of the house of lords?
“if only i had some man to counsel me,” thought poor mrs. unett. “but i can’t consult dr. harford, and the dean must not know of the betrothal. i must go to whitbourne and get my father’s advice—how is a lonely woman to judge in so difficult a matter?”
“hilary,” she said, in a tone of relief. “we will drive over this very day to whitbourne and consult your grandfather. dry your eyes, child; he will be sure to tell us what it is right to do.”
now hilary was quite without her mother’s tendency to consult a man in every difficulty, nevertheless she hailed with no small satisfaction this notion of going to whitbourne, for whitbourne was twenty-three miles from hereford, and with every inch she felt that she would be stronger to harden her heart against gabriel. nothing would have induced her to confess this thought to anybody, but deep down in her own consciousness she was aware of a great dread. if she met gabriel, and if again he were to give her that look of reproachful love she feared he might break down her power of resistance.
there was a certain comfort, moreover, in the hurried preparations for departure; they would inevitably stay for a few days, for a journey over the proverbially bad roads of herefordshire was not by any to be taken in hand lightly or unadvisedly, but required a little breathing time in which fragile ladies of mrs. unett’s constitution might recover from the severe shaking undergone.
by the time the coach was at the door hilary had contrived to wash away all traces of her tears, and only a very careful observer would have noticed that her smile was forced, and that her laugh did not ring true.
great rejoicings were going on in the city, and the cheers of the crowd excited her, until suddenly the shouting began to form itself into actual words, and a man who had been loyally drinking himself drunk in honour of the victory of powick bridge, hung on to the coach door, wildly waving his hat and bawling at the top of his voice, “god save king charles, and hang up the roundheads!”
hilary, in deep disgust, promptly drew the leathern curtain across the window, but though she could thus shut out the hideous leering face of the pseudo-patriot, she could not banish his words, which persistently rang in her ears as the coach lumbered out through byster’s gate and along the rough road to whitbourne; nor could she shut out the mental picture which the words conjured up, the picture of gabriel harford with a rope about his neck.
“i wish i had not used the term ‘roundhead’ this morning; ’tis only fit for such people as that drunken wretch in bye-street,” she thought. and, having once begun to see something amiss in her words, she continued the salutary, but depressing, occupation all through the drive, ending with the humiliating perception that she had defended the cause she believed to be right in the wrong way, and that although nothing would induce her to be betrothed to a rebel, she had certainly by her harshness done much to confirm him in his convictions.
it was quite dusk when they arrived at the bishop’s country residence, the evening air had grown cold, and the two ladies, stiff and weary with their drive, were glad to see the lights within the pretty gabled house, and the door flung wide to welcome them. the bishop’s surprise and pleasure at their unexpected arrival touched hilary, who was always at her best when with her grandfather, and mrs. unett’s explanation that she had come to talk over a family matter, having been made, the bishop, possibly guessing from his grandchild’s face what the “family matter” was, deferred the talk till the morning.
they supped quietly with bishop coke and his chaplain, and the name of harford was never once mentioned, but the talk turned inevitably to the news of powick fight, until the bishop, with a sigh, used the very same words which gabriel had used in the morning as to hoping that all would be swiftly decided by one great battle. then, rising from table, he led the way to the hall, where the household assembled for evening prayers, read by the chaplain, after which hilary, in a much softened mood, was glad to go to bed.
she woke the next morning with an aching head and a sore heart, wondering whether every future awakening would be so full of misery and desolation.
“it shall not be!” she determined, vigorously; “i will not allow my life to be spoilt in that fashion.” and springing out of bed she dressed rapidly, hurried through her prayers—because she found that on her knees tears were somehow apt to come into her eyes—and without waiting for food hastened out of the house.
the fresh morning air was a relief, and she hailed with joy the sight of a visitor riding up the approach. on nearer view she recognised him as dr. rogers, one of the cathedral canons and rector of stoke edith.
“why, mistress hilary!” he exclaimed, “i had not thought to find you here; you are a sight to cheer a downhearted man on a sad morn.”
“but we had good news, sir, yesterday, of the victory,” said hilary. “they brought us the news at hereford.”
“ay, my dear, but i come from worcester with yet later news of defeat. my lord essex, who is in command of the rebel army, entered worcester and has taken possession of the city. with my own eyes i saw his vile troops quartered in the cathedral; the knaves had no sort of reverence, and have stabled their horses in the cloisters. but there! i could not offend your ear by describing the scene. would that i had the hanging of them! they should have but short shrift!”
the worthy canon was an ardent—even a bitter—royalist, and his burning words added fuel to the fire already kindled in hilary’s heart. she listened eagerly to all he had to tell of the occupation of worcester, and received passively and contentedly the exaggerated doctrine of the unquestioning obedience which was the sole duty of the subject, and the supreme, divinely-given authority which was the prerogative of the king—the king who, according to dr. rogers could do no wrong.
few people are at their best in the early morning before breakfast, after any special fatigue on the previous day, and hilary, who at another time might have been capable of seeing the weak points in dr. rogers’s harangue, drank it in now without any misgivings, reflecting all the time what a bulwark it would make against that secret dread lest she should be conquered by gabriel’s love.
and so it came to pass, that whereas on the previous night she had been gentle-minded and sorrowing over her own shortcomings, when morning service time came and they all went by the little wicket-gate in the drive to the church close by, she was in a very different mood, and never prayed a single prayer, because the whole time she was picturing the scene in the cathedral described by dr. rogers.
“it is to vile men like this that gabriel has allied himself,” she thought, indignantly; “men without any reverence, men who have turned the bishops out of the house of lords, and who would fain abolish the prayer-book! nothing is sacred to them—not even a church!”
it never occurred to her that perhaps by her thoughts she was more grossly desecrating the building she deemed sacred than the troops of lord essex had desecrated the cathedral, which, of course, in puritan eyes, was only a large building that could at once be used as a shelter from the cold, and which they considered no more sacred than the rest of the world to him whose throne is the heaven and whose footstool is the earth.
dr. rogers remained to the noontide meal, and then rode on to other houses to impart his news. when he had gone the bishop was closeted alone for some time with mrs. unett, and at length hilary was summoned to the family conclave. she had no misgivings now, all the tenderness of the previous evening had vanished, and the kindly old bishop was astonished at the change that had come over her.
“child,” he said, “i am much grieved to learn from your mother that gabriel harford hath ranged himself on the side of the parliament. it is doubtless the effect of overmuch intercourse with sir robert harley. still matters of state, matters soon i trust to be satisfactorily settled, need not greatly affect your future happiness. god forbid that i should part you from one i know to be as clean-souled a man as you will ever meet. an you still love him i will not refuse to wed you in due time.”
“but i do not still love him,” said hilary with decision, nettled, she scarce knew why, by her grandfather’s tribute to gabriel. a day or two ago her heart would have throbbed with delight to hear his praises; now the demon of pride had turned all to bitterness, and she was defiantly determined to stand to all that she had said to her lover during their dispute.
they discussed the affair for some little time, but hilary was not to be moved, and the bishop could not but admit that there might be difficulties in the future should the war prove longer than was expected.
he was scarcely quit of his granddaughter when to his discomfort dr. harford was announced; it appeared that, having learnt from gabriel what had passed, the doctor had called on mrs. unett, but hearing that she had gone to whitbourne had deemed it best to approach the bishop himself.
“my lord,” he said, “gabriel is in despair over the unlucky dispute of yesterday. i promised him to see if there was any hope that your granddaughter would reconsider the matter. the boy is hot-tempered and admits that he might have put his views before her more considerately. but the fact was they were both excited by the news of the defeat at powick bridge, and were betrayed into a dispute and quarrel which he bitterly regrets.”
“it is true then that he has allied himself to the side of the parliament?” asked the bishop.
“yes, quite true, my lord, but he will not admit that political matters have aught to do with a love already given, and i agree with him.”
“i said as much to hilary but now,” said the bishop. “the maid vows she will not love a rebel. you had better see her yourself, doctor. so much do i value your son’s high character that i told her, spite of his views, i would gladly wed her to him. but hilary is not easily led, nor will i attempt to coerce her. there she goes, walking towards the moat; do you, if you will, sir, follow her and plead your son’s cause.”
the doctor willingly obeyed, and the bishop, with a sigh, took up an old fourteenth-century manuscript entitled “sixteen revelations of divine love,” and tried to forget the sorrows and distracting cares of his times by reading words written hundreds of years before by juliana, an anchorite of norwich:—“and he will that our hearts be mightily raised above the deepness of the earth, and all vain sorrows, and enjoy in him. this was a delectable sight, and a restful showing that is without end; and the beholding of this whiles we are here it is full pleasant to god and full great speed to us. and the soul that thus beholdeth, it maketh him like to him that is beholden, and oned it in rest and in peace by his grace.”
meanwhile, dr. harford followed the graceful figure in the soft grey gown crossing the trim lawns which stretched down to the moat. in those days of hand-loom weaving, dresses were costly and lasted long. hilary still wore the one she had been wearing on the day of gabriel’s return from oxford when he had been “shot through the ear with a love-song; the very pin of his heart cleft with the blind bow-boy’s butt-shaft.” but the morning was very cold, and she had put on a little short cape and hood of grey, lined with rose pink, in which she looked so ravishingly beautiful that the doctor felt a fresh pang of compassion for gabriel’s loss.
her face clouded when on turning round she saw him approaching. he had always had a great influence over her, and, being in a perverse mood, she set herself to resist any appeal he might make, and tried naughtily to criticise his grave, strong face. the sudden brightness of his smile, however, which was so like gabriel’s, somewhat disconcerted her, and her greeting was less cold than she had intended.
“the bishop told me to seek you here, hilary,” he said, gently. “i am come in a two-fold capacity—as gabriel’s father and as your father’s friend. have you forgotten how greatly he wished a union betwixt you two?”
“the war has changed all that,” said hilary. “he would not approve now, sir.”
“i assure you that he foresaw troubled times,” said dr. harford. “and knowing that in many points your grandfather did not hold with him, he begged me to do what i could to help you. ’tis the memory of his words that brings me here today.”
“many desired reforms then who would not side now with the parliament,” said hilary. “doubtless he would have followed my lord falkland’s example.”
“i do not think he would; their natures were wholly different. but, child, it is of hearts, not of politics, i would speak. do you quite realise what you are doing when you vow you will never again see the man who for so long has devotedly loved you?”
“it is he who has changed,” said hilary, fighting hard to keep the tears out of her eyes.
“it is true,” said the doctor, “that no young and unformed nature could possibly have lived in london through these perplexing years without growth and development. but as a lover, he is unchanged, absolutely constant, and broken-hearted at this untoward dispute. is there no hope that you will reconsider what you said? he quite admits that he might have explained things more considerately yesterday, but you were both of you stirred by the news of the fighting.”
hilary stifled her inclination to yield; the very sound of the word “fighting” had called back her powers of resistance.
“and to-day when we have just heard how the rebel troops have defiled worcester cathedral you think to find me more amenable?” she exclaimed, indignantly. “tell gabriel, sir, that i am more than ever resolved to have nothing to do with those who side with the parliament. he has given me up for what he calls the ‘country’ and, pray, tell him that i care only for the king.”
in her sparkling eyes, in the hard look which dawned in the naturally sweet face, the doctor saw that his mission was hopeless. very sadly he bade her farewell, convinced that further words would only strengthen her in her resolve; his keen, all-observant eyes seemed for a moment to look her through and through, then, with profound gravity, he turned and walked back to the house.
hilary, with a heavy heart, sauntered aimlessly along beside the moat. she was not well pleased with herself, for as she grew cooler she perceived that her last words had not rung true, and if there was one thing she prided herself on, it was on a high standard of truth and honour. was it absolutely the case that she cared only for the king? was her loyal devotion to an unseen head of the state to eclipse every other claim? she pictured gabriel’s face as he received her curt, cold message, and her pride began to waver; slowly she re-crossed the lawns towards the house—should she not add some more kindly word? was it not possible to be true to her notion of loyalty yet less harsh to the man who loved her?
glancing up at the study window she saw the old whitehaired bishop, and remembered how infinitely more thoughtful for gabriel he had been. yet no one could dare to call his loyalty in question. what was it that made him view the matter so differently?
drawing nearer she saw that he was standing with clasped hands and closed eyes, his serene face showing plainly that he was in a region far above the petty divisions and difficulties of english life.
“he sees beyond the struggle and lives in another atmosphere,” thought the girl, all her hardness melting as she looked at the saintly old face. then, quickening her steps, she hastened on to overtake the doctor before he mounted, not pausing to think what words she should say, but with an eager desire to undo the effect of her needlessly cold message.
“where is dr. harford?” she asked, encountering one of the servants.
“he would not stay for food, mistress,” replied the man. “i saw him mount his horse but now.”
with an impatient exclamation, hilary ran through the hall and out into the drive; surely she should be in time to stop him, it could not be too late.
but the doctor, less calm inwardly than he had appeared to her, had set spurs to his steed and was already out of sight, though she could hear the sound of horse hoofs in the distance. they seemed to her fancy to beat out the words she had sent back to gabriel, those words which were after all not wholly true. choking back a sob, she tried to turn her thoughts to dr. roger’s harangue on the divine right of kings. it was but cold comfort.
