"then you think, milly, that's what i ought to do? you think i'd better go and never come back again till i feel quite sure of myself?"

"i think so, harry, i think so.... i think so.... and yet ... it's very hard not to see you for so long, harry."[pg 337]

"but i shall write to you every day, milly, however long it may be; and if i conquer myself, why, then, milly, i shall feel i can come back fit to marry you. i'm not fit now, and unless i feel that i've put myself straight with you and my uncle, i'll never come back again—never, never, never!"

milly's lip trembled, but she only answered bravely, "that's well, harry; for then you'll make all the more effort, and for my sake i'm sure you'll conquer. but, harry, i wish before you go you'd tell me plainly what else it is that you've been doing besides playing and losing your uncle's money."

"oh, milly, milly, i can't—i mustn't. if i were to tell you that you could never again respect me—you could never love me."

milly was a wise girl, and pressed him no further. after all, there are some things it is better for none of us to know about one another, and this thing was just one of them.

so harry walpole went away from cheltenham, nobody knew whither, except milly; not daring to confide the secret of his whereabouts even to his uncle, nor seeing that sole friend once more before he went, but going away that very night, on his own resources, to seek his own fortune as best he might in the great world of london. "tell my uncle why i have gone," he said to milly; "that it is in order to conquer myself; and tell him that i'll write to you constantly, and that you will let him know from time to time whether i am well and making progress."

it was a hard time for poor old sir thomas, no doubt, those four years that harry was away from him, he knew not where, and he was left alone by himself in his dreary home; but he felt it was best so; he knew harry was trying to conquer himself. how harry lived or what he was doing he never heard; but once or twice milly hinted[pg 338] to him that harry seemed sorely in want of money, and sir thomas gave her some to send him, and every time it was at once returned, with a very firm but gentle message from harry to say that he was able, happily, to do without it, and would not further trouble his uncle. it was only from milly that sir thomas could learn anything about his dear boy, and he saw her and asked her about him so often that he learned at last to love her like a daughter.

four years rolled slowly away, and at the end of them sir thomas was one day sitting in his little library, somewhat disconsolate, and reflecting to himself that he ought to have somebody living with him at his time of life, when suddenly there came a ring and a knock that made him start with surprise and pleasure, for he recognized them at once as being harry's. next moment, the servant brought him a card, on which was engraved in small letters, "dr. h. walpole," and down in the left-hand corner, "surrey hospital."

sir thomas turned the card over and over with a momentary feeling of disappointment, for he had somehow fancied to himself that harry had gone off covering himself with glory among zulus or afghans, and he couldn't help feeling that beside that romantic dream of soldierly rehabilitation a plain doctor's life was absurdly prosaic. next moment, harry himself was grasping his hand warmly, and prose and poetry were alike forgotten in that one vivid all-absorbing delight of his boy recovered.

as soon as the first flush of excitement was fairly over, and harry had cried regretfully, "why, uncle, how much older you're looking!" and sir thomas had exclaimed in his fatherly joy, "why, harry, my boy, what a fine fellow you've turned out, god bless me!" harry took a little bank bag of sovereigns from his coat pocket and laid it down, very red, upon the corner of the table. "these are yours, uncle," he said simply.[pg 339]

sir thomas's first impulse was to say, "no, no, my boy; keep them, keep them, and let us forget all about it," but he checked himself just in time, for he saw that the best thing all round was to take them quietly and trouble poor harry no more with the recollection. "thank you, my boy," the old soldier answered, taking them up and pocketing them as though it were merely the repayment of an ordinary debt. ("the school for the orphan children of officers in the army will be all the richer for it," he thought to himself) "and now tell me, harry, how have you been living, and what have you been doing ever since i last saw you?"

"uncle," harry cried—he hadn't unlearnt to think of him and call him by that fond old name, then—"uncle, i've been conquering myself. from the day i left you i've never touched a card once—not once, uncle."

"except, i suppose, for a quiet rubber?" the old colonel put in softly.

"not even for a rubber, uncle," harry answered, half smiling; "nor a cue nor a dice-box either, nor anything like them. i've determined to steer clear of all the dangers that surround me by inheritance, and i'm not going to begin again as long as i live, uncle."

"that's well, harry, that's well. and you didn't go in for a direct commission, then? i was in hopes, my boy, that you would still, in spite of everything, go into the queen's service."

harry's face fell a little. "uncle," he said, "i'm sorry to have disappointed you; sorry to have been compelled to run counter to any little ambitions you might have had for me in that respect; but i felt, after all you told me that day, that the army would be a very dangerous profession for me; and though i didn't want to be a coward and run away from danger, i didn't want to be foolhardy and heedlessly expose myself to it. so i thought on the whole it would be wiser for me to give up the direct commission[pg 340] business altogether, and go in at once for being a doctor. it was safer, and therefore better in the end both for me and for you, uncle."

sir thomas took the young man's hand once more, and pressed it gently with a fatherly pressure. "my boy," he said, "you are right, quite right—a great deal more right, indeed, than i was. but how on earth have you found money to keep yourself alive and pay for your education all these years—tell me harry?"

harry's face flushed up again, this time with honest pride, as he answered bravely, "i've earned enough by teaching and drawing to pay my way the whole time, till i got qualified. i've been qualified now for nine months, and got a post as house-surgeon at our hospital; but i've waited to come and tell you till i'd saved up that money, you know, out of my salary, and now i'm coming back to settle down in practice here, uncle."

sir thomas said nothing, but he rose from his chair and took both harry's hands in his with tears. for a few minutes, he looked at him tenderly and admiringly, then he said in his simple way, "god bless you! god bless you! i couldn't have done it myself, my boy. i couldn't have done it myself, harry."

there was a minute's pause, and then sir thomas began again, "what a secretive little girl that dear little miss milly must be, never to have told me a word of all this, harry. she kept as quiet about all details as if she was sworn to the utmost secrecy."

harry rose and opened the library door. "milly!" he called out, and a light little figure glided in from the drawing-room opposite.

"we expect to be married in three weeks, uncle—as soon as the banns can be published," harry went on, presenting his future wife as it were to the colonel. "milly's money will just be enough for us to live upon until i can scrape together a practice, and she has confidence enough[pg 341] in me to believe that in the end i shall manage to get one."

sir thomas drew her down to his chair and kissed her forehead. "milly," he said, softly, "you have chosen well. harry, you have done wisely. i shall have two children now instead of one. if you are to live near me i shall be very happy. but, harry, you have proved yourself well. now you must let me buy you a practice."