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CHAPTER I

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"thousand-pounders"—ontario agricultural college—political meetings—volunteer artillery—value of the agricultural college.

the western states and provinces of north america thrive on our “thousand-pounders” and “remittance-men.” some years ago in one small prairie town of iowa there were 105 young britons on the books of the local club. one of these (dubbed sitting-bull after a famous brave) was doing fairly well in a milk-walk; a few others earned livings as farm hands; the rest were, said the natives, “doing no good.” how should they, unless to the manner born? four young sons of farmers and parsons, all neighbours from owersby, walesby, and other lincolnshire "by’s," bought a “raw” farm on instalments in the red river valley. a land-seeker was sent there by the owner. “he has not got us yet,” said the lads; “we are ready with our instalment.” but he got 2them at last, with their improvements—homestead, stable, well, and many acres under plough. that is how the “thousand-pounders” nourish the west; not that these lincolnshire men had so much between them, but many collapse with even more capital, for lack of experience. and even afterwards the experience, thus bought at a long price, does not generally lead to much.

in 1890, 1280 acres of carefully-chosen land awaited me in manitoba, bought from and traversed by the manitoba and north-western railway. to qualify myself for farming this land i went to guelph, in ontario, canada.

the ontario agricultural college is recognised as one of the finest institutions of its kind on the continent of america, because of the thoroughness of its methods and the class of graduates it turns out. there are graduates of this college holding professorships in many of the agricultural colleges of the states, others in charge of large farming interests, and also of some of the largest dairies in the country.

students have come here from mexico, argentine, and even from japan, sent by their respective countries. i am sorry to say that the majority of us english students did not come up to the general standard, frittered our time away, and thought more of standing 3high in the estimation of the girls down-town than in that of the professors. the great handicap under which an english student labours at the college is the fact that he has no practical knowledge of farming while he is trying to learn the technical and scientific part. i could not, for instance, appreciate duly the fact that there were over a hundred different varieties of wheat, when i could not tell wheat from barley growing in the fields. at a live-stock examination i once attended, the examiner had two sheep in the room. “now,” he said, “here are a cotswold and a shropshire ram; i want you to give me what are the best points of each class, and then try to find them on the rams in front of you.” i had all the good points of both sheep as per text-book on the tip of my tongue, and got them off in good style, and then proceeded to demonstrate them on the specimens in front of me. when i got through, the examiner said, “very good indeed, but unfortunately the one you are describing as a cotswold is the shropshire, and vice versa.” and the worst of it is, that to this day i do not know if he was joking or not, as he gave me a “pass.”

the college could accommodate about two hundred students, most of whom boarded inside, though this was optional. the course was of three years for the 4degree of b.s.a.—bachelor of the science of agriculture. they also used to give a certificate at the end of the second year for those students who could not complete a full course. the first year’s work was to a large extent general education, for the benefit of the farmers’ lads, being courses in literature, mathematics, and chemistry, though there were also lectures on agriculture, dairy-work, and veterinary science. the lectures were in the mornings and every alternate afternoon, the other afternoons being filled with practical work on the farm, for which the students were paid, according to their ability, from 1 cent to 10 cents per hour. the second year there is more of agriculture, chemistry, veterinary science, &c., and less of other matters; and the same applies to the third year. during the long holidays from june to september the students who so desire can remain and work on the farm under pay. this enables students practically to pay their way through college without assistance from their people. the college farm consists of some 600 acres, some 200 of which are under cultivation, though a large tract of this is given up to experimental work with different kinds of grains, different admixtures of soils, &c. the college also grows all varieties of fruits and flowers that do well in that climate. they have fine specimens of the 5different breeds of cattle, hogs, and sheep, for use in the lecture-rooms; also a splendidly equipped dairy, where cheese- and butter-making is taught.

for the athletic side of education there was a fine gymnasium and swimming-pool, and a recreation field for football, baseball, &c. here, we english students were in our element, and, so far as i remember, during the two sessions i attended lectures at the college the football club was almost entirely composed of englishmen, though there were some fine canadian players in the team also. the students were supposed to be fed entirely on the products of the farm, and the meals were certainly unequalled in any hotel in the city. still we kicked on general principles, as men do almost everywhere. on one occasion the boys thought they were getting rhubarb-pie and rhubarb-pudding too frequently, and sent up a note to that effect to the president, who, of course, ignored it altogether. then, of course, it became a matter of honour that the rhubarb should stop, and next morning there was not a plant of rhubarb growing on the college grounds. it cost the students a fine of $1 per head, but every one was happy.

the college was supported by the government of the province, which at that time was of the “grit” or liberal party, and the students were all enthusiastic 6politicians whenever they could get off in the evening to attend a political meeting. i remember one night i was on my way to a dance, but was prevailed upon to go first to a political meeting with the boys. when we arrived, one hundred strong, at the city hall, we were refused admittance. but, putting the football team at the head of the wedge, we soon arrived close up to the stage. on either side of the stage were hoses and nozzles for use in case of fire, and some brilliant genius took one down and turned it on us. then the fun really began, for we stormed the stage, got hold of both hoses, and watered up that assembly good and plenty. we were most of us pretty damp, and i know, as i clambered down a fire-escape, that my shirt front was not in condition for a ballroom.

our president, mr. mills, was one of the finest men i have ever come across, and the boys all thought a great deal of him. there was a door between the college and his private house, and he used to say that he never allowed college matters to pass that door. no matter what trouble you got into in the college, you were always a welcome guest in the president’s house. i early got into the bad graces of the professor of agriculture, who had no love for english students, and the word was passed to the farm-foreman 7to see that no easy jobs came our way. this finally led to my rustication. i had been invited out to an “at home” one evening, and that afternoon happened to be hoeing sugar-beets when the farm-foreman came along. i asked him to let me off early, so that i could wash and change my clothes. he, thinking to be sarcastic by giving what he thought to be an impossible task for me, said, “you can go when you have hoed five more rows.” i asked him to mark them out, and then started in to make the weeds fly, and, incidentally, some beets also. i got through about five o’clock, shouldered my hoe, and started home, when i met the foreman. he asked me where i was going, and i told him i was through. he came back and found it as i had said, and then told me to go back to work, as he was only joking. i told him i did not understand jokes of this sort, and started off. then he lost his temper, ran after me, and tried to use force to stop me. he was, of course, much stronger than i was, but, unfortunately, did not know how to handle himself; so after a short session i went on my way rejoicing. when i returned to my room that night i found a note from the agricultural professor—who was in charge, as the president was away—giving me twenty-four hours to clear out, for insubordination and assaulting my superior. 8i borrowed a tent, and went into camp. one of my friends down-town happened to be a big political gun, and the next time i was at his house he asked me all about it. i told him the facts, and within a week i got a letter from the minister of agriculture asking for proofs, which i forwarded in the shape of letters from other students who had been working with me at the time. by return mail i got a letter ordering my reinstatement; and the next morning, when i applied for my old room it was given me without more ado.

guelph has two volunteer artillery companies, one filled with students from the college, and one with town boys, four guns to each battery. i joined the college battery, and after a couple of months of steady drill in guelph we were taken out to camp at niagara, on the lake near the falls. there were five or six other batteries there also, some cavalry, and some infantry. one day while standing listening to the band i got into conversation with an artilleryman from welland, and after some talk found, to my astonishment, that he had been a room-mate of mine at westward ho. since then i have met two or three other boys from the old school. it was wonderful how quickly they licked us into shape, for the canadian lads are, like the americans of the south and 9west, natural soldiers, being bright, intelligent, anxious to learn, and able to stand considerable hardship—as was proven in the riel rebellion, and also, i think, in africa, where some of my old guelph friends went. that the college turned out good men is proved in the person of the president. he had worked his way through college practically without assistance from his people, took his degree at the head of his class, and with it a professorship in the mississippi agricultural college. then, after various other positions, he was selected as president of his former college on the retirement of our old head.

i would advise no young english lad to go to the college until he has worked at least a year or two on some canadian farm to get the practical knowledge necessary to really get the good out of his college course. he should also have the rudiments of a good general education. here i might mention that the college did not teach spelling; in this country it is not thought as much of as in england, and nearly all americans are bad spellers. for instance, the business man who, on reading about roosevelt’s spelling reform, said that he could not see anything new about it, as that was the way he had spelled all his life! if here and in other places i seem to roast americans, they must not be offended, 10as it is meant in all good nature; and they must also remember that i have been roasted by them for the past sixteen years, and this is the first time i have had a chance to get back at them without giving them a chance to answer me.

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