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Chapter XXI

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i see the empress — my conversations with her — the valville — i leave zaiya i leave st. petersburg and arrive at warsaw — the princes adam czartoryski and sulkowski — the king of poland — theatrical intrigues — byanicki

i thought of leaving russia at the beginning of the autumn, but i was told by m m. panin and alsuwieff that i ought not to go without having spoken to the empress.

“i should be sorry to do so,” i replied, “but as i can’t find anyone to present me to her, i must be resigned.”

at last panin told me to walk in a garden frequented by her majesty at an early hour, and he said that meeting me, as it were by chance, she would probably speak to me. i told him i should like him to be with her, and he accordingly named a day.

i repaired to the garden, and as i walked about i marvelled at the statuary it contained, all the statues being made of the worst stone, and executed in the worst possible taste. the names cut beneath them gave the whole the air of a practical joke. a weeping statue was democritus; another, with grinning mouth, was labelled heraclitus; an old man with a long beard was sappho; and an old woman, avicenna; and so on.

as i was smiling at this extraordinary collection, i saw the czarina, preceded by count gregorius orloff, and followed by two ladies, approaching. count panin was on her left hand. i stood by the hedge to let her pass, but as soon as she came up to me she asked, smilingly, if i had been interested in the statues. i replied, following her steps, that i presumed they had been placed there to impose on fools, or to excite the laughter of those acquainted with history.

“from what i can make out,” she replied, “the secret of the matter is that my worthy aunt was imposed on, and indeed she did not trouble herself much about such trifles. but i hope you have seen other things in russia less ridiculous than these statues?”

i entertained the sovereign for more than an hour with my remarks on the things of note i had seen in st. petersburg. the conversation happened to turn on the king of prussia, and i sang his praises; but i censured his terrible habit of always interrupting the person whom he was addressing. catherine smiled and asked me to tell her about the conversation i had had with this monarch, and i did so to the best of my ability. she was then kind enough to say that she had never seen me at the courtag, which was a vocal and instrumental concert given at the palace, and open to all. i told her that i had only attended once, as i was so unfortunate as not to have a taste for music. at this she turned to panin, and said smilingly that she knew someone else who had the same misfortune. if the reader remembers what i heard her say about music as she was leaving the opera, he will pronounce my speech to have been a very courtier-like one, and i confess it was; but who can resist making such speeches to a monarch, and above all, a monarch in petticoats?

the czarina turned from me to speak to m. bezkoi, who had just come up, and as m. panin left the garden i did so too, delighted with the honour i had had.

the empress, who was a woman of moderate height and yet of a majestic appearance, thoroughly understood the art of making herself loved. she was not beautiful, but yet she was sure of pleasing by her geniality and her wit, and also by that exquisite tact which made one forget the awfulness of the sovereign in the gentleness of the woman. a few days after, count partin told me that the empress had twice asked after me, and that this was a sure sign i had pleased her. he advised me to look out for another opportunity of meeting her, and said that for the future she would always tell me to approach whenever she saw me, and that if i wanted some employment she might possible do something for me.

though i did not know what employ i could ask for in that disagreeable country, i was glad to hear that i could have easy access to the court. with that idea i walked in the garden every day, and here follows my second conversation with the empress she saw me at a distance and sent an officer to fetch me into her presence. as everybody was talking of the tournament, which had to be postponed on account of the bad weather, she asked me if this kind of entertainment could be given at venice. i told her some amusing stories on the subject of shows and spectacles, and in this relation i remarked that the venetian climate was more pleasant than the russian, for at venice fine days were the rule, while at st. petersburg they were the exception, though the year is younger there than anywhere else.

“yes,” she said, “in your country it is eleven days older.”

“would it not be worthy of your majesty to put russia on an equality with the rest of the world in this respect, by adopting the gregorian calendar? all the protestants have done so, and england, who adopted it fourteen years ago, has already gained several millions. all europe is astonished that the old style should be suffered to exist in a country where the sovereign is the head of the church, and whose capital contains an academy of science. it is thought that peter the great, who made the year begin in january, would have also abolished the old style if he had not been afraid of offending england, which then kept trade and commerce alive throughout your vast empire.” “you know,” she replied, with a sly smile, “that peter the great was not exactly a learned man.”

“he was more than a man of learning, the immortal peter was a genius of the first order. instinct supplied the place of science with him; his judgment was always in the right. his vast genius, his firm resolve, prevented him from making mistakes, and helped him to destroy all those abuses which threatened to oppose his great designs.”

her majesty seemed to have heard me with great interest, and was about to reply when she noticed two ladies whom she summoned to her presence. to me she said —

“i shall be delighted to reply to you at another time,” and then turned towards the ladies.

the time came in eight or ten days, when i was beginning to think she had had enough of me, for she had seen me without summoning me to speak to her.

she began by saying what i desired should be done was done already. “all the letters sent to foreign countries and all the important state records are marked with both dates.”

“but i must point out to your majesty that by the end of the century the difference will be of twelve days, not eleven.”

“not at all; we have seen to that. the last year of this century will not be counted as a leap year. it is fortunate that the difference is one of eleven days, for as that is the number which is added every year to the epact our epacts are almost the same. as to the celebration of easter, that is a different question. your equinox is on march the 21st, ours on the 10th, and the astronomers say we are both wrong; sometimes it is we who are wrong and sometimes you, as the equinox varies. you know you are not even in agreement with the jews, whose calculation is said to be perfectly accurate; and, in fine, this difference in the time of celebrating easter does not disturb in any way public order or the progress of the government.”

“your majesty’s words fill me with admiration, but the festival of christmas ——”

“i suppose you are going to say that we do not celebrate christmas in the winter solstice as should properly be done. we know it, but it seems to me a matter of no account. i would rather bear with this small mistake than grievously afflict vast numbers of my subjects by depriving them of their birthdays. if i did so, there would be no open complaints uttered, as that is not the fashion in russia; but they would say in secret that i was an atheist, and that i disputed the infallibility of the council of nice. you may think such complaints matter for laughter, but i do not, for i have much more agreeable motives for amusement.”

the czarina was delighted to mark my surprise. i did not doubt for a moment that she had made a special study of the whole subject. m. alsuwieff told me, a few days after, that she had very possibly read a little pamphlet on the subject, the statements of which exactly coincided with her own. he took care to add, however, that it was very possible her highness was profoundly learned on the matter, but this was merely a courtier’s phrase.

what she said was spoken modestly and energetically, and her good humour and pleasant smile remained unmoved throughout. she exercised a constant self-control over herself, and herein appeared the greatness of her character, for nothing is more difficult. her demeanour, so different from that of the prussian king, shewed her to be the greater sovereign of the two; her frank geniality always gave her the advantage, while the short, curt manners of the king often exposed him to being made a dupe. in an examination of the life of frederick the great, one cannot help paying a deserved tribute to his courage, but at the same time one feels that if it had not been for repeated turns of good fortune he must have succumbed, whereas catherine was little indebted to the favours of the blind deity. she succeeded in enterprises which, before her time, would have been pronounced impossibilities, and it seemed her aim to make men look upon her achievements as of small account.

i read in one of our modern journals, those monuments of editorial self-conceit, that catherine the great died happily as she had lived. everybody knows that she died suddenly on her close stool. by calling such a death happy, the journalist hints that it is the death he himself would wish for. everyone to his taste, and we can only hope that the editor may obtain his wish; but who told this silly fellow that catherine desired such a death? if he regards such a wish as natural to a person of her profound genius i would ask who told him that men of genius consider a sudden death to be a happy one? is it because that is his opinion, and are we to conclude that he is therefore person of genius? to come to the truth we should have to interrogate the late empress, and ask her some such question as:

“are you well pleased to have died suddenly?”

she would probably reply:

“what a foolish question! such might be the wish of one driven to despair, or of someone suffering from a long and grievous malady. such was not my position, for i enjoyed the blessings of happiness and good health; no worse fate could have happened to me. my sudden death prevented me from concluding several designs which i might have brought to a successful issue if god had granted me the warning of a, slight illness. but it was not so; i had to set out on the long journey at a moment’s notice, without the time to make any preparations. is my death any the happier from my not foreseeing it? do you think me such a coward as to dread the approach of what is common to all? i tell you that i should have accounted myself happy if i had had a respite of but a day. then i should not complain of the divine justice.”

“does your highness accuse god of injustice, then?”

“what boots it, since i am a lost soul? do you expect the damned to acknowledge the justice of the decree which has consigned them to eternal woe?”

“no doubt it is a difficult matter, but i should have thought that a sense of the justice of your doom would have mitigated the pains of it.”

“perhaps so, but a damned soul must be without consolation for ever.”

“in spite of that there are some philosophers who call you happy in your death by virtue of its suddenness.”

“not philosophers, but fools, for in its suddenness was the pain and woe.”

“well said; but may i ask your highness if you admit the possibility of a happy eternity after an unhappy death, or of an unhappy doom after a happy death?”

“such suppositions are inconceivable. the happiness of futurity lies in the ecstasy of the soul in feeling freed from the trammels of matter, and unhappiness is the doom of a soul which was full of remorse at the moment it left the body. but enough, for my punishment forbids my farther speech.”

“tell me, at least, what is the nature of your punishment?”

“an everlasting weariness. farewell.”

after this long and fanciful digression the reader will no doubt be obliged by my returning to this world.

count panin told me that in a few days the empress would leave for her country house, and i determined to have an interview with her, foreseeing that it would be for the last time.

i had been in the garden for a few minutes when heavy rain began to fall, and i was going to leave, when the empress summoned me into an apartment on the ground floor of the palace, where she was walking up and down with gregorovitch and a maid of honour.

“i had forgotten to ask you,” she said, graciously, “if you believe the new calculation of the calendar to be exempt from error?”

“no, your majesty; but the error is so minute that it will not produce any sensible effect for the space of nine or ten thousand years.”

“i thought so; and in my opinion pope gregory should not have acknowledged any mistake at all. the pope, however, had much less difficulty in carrying out his reform than i should have with my subjects, who are too fond of their ancient usages and customs.” “nevertheless, i am sure your majesty would meet with obedience.” “no doubt, but imagine the grief of my clergy in not being able to celebrate the numerous saints’ days, which would fall on the eleven days to be suppressed. you have only one saint for each day, but we have a dozen at least. i may remark also that all ancient states and kingdoms are attached to their ancient laws. i have heard that your republic of venice begins the year in march, and that seems to me, as it were, a monument and memorial of its antiquity — and indeed the year begins more naturally in march than in january — but does not this usage cause some confusion?”

“none at all, your majesty. the letters m v, which we adjoin to all dates in january and february, render all mistakes impossible.”

“venice is also noteworthy for its peculiar system of heraldry, by the amusing form under which it portrays its patron saint, and by the five latin words with which the evangelist is invoked, in which, as i am told, there is a grammatical blunder which has become respectable by its long standing. but is it true that you do not distinguish between the day and night hours?”

“it is, your majesty, and what is more we reckon the day from the beginning of the night.”

“such is the force of custom, which makes us admire what other nations think ridiculous. you see no inconvenience in your division of the day, which strikes me as most inconvenient.”

“you would only have to look at your watch, and you would not need to listen for the cannon shot which announces the close of day.”

“yes, but for this one advantage you have over us, we have two over you. we know that at twelve o’clock it is either mid-day or midnight.”

the czarina spoke to me about the fondness of the venetians for games of chance, and asked if the genoa lottery had been established there. “i have been asked,” she added, “to allow the lottery to be established in my own dominions; but i should never permit it except on the condition that no stake should be below a rouble, and then the poor people would not be able to risk their money in it.”

i replied to this discreet observation with a profound inclination of the head, and thus ended my last interview with the famous empress who reigned thirty-five years without committing a single mistake of any importance. the historian will always place her amongst great sovereigns, though the moralist will always consider her, and rightly, as one of the most notable of dissolute women.

a few days before i left i gave an entertainment to my friends at catherinhoff, winding up with a fine display of fireworks, a present from my friend melissino. my supper for thirty was exquisite, and my ball a brilliant one. in spite of the tenuity of my purse i felt obliged to give my friends this mark of my gratitude for the kindness they had lavished on me.

i left russia with the actress valville, and i must here tell the reader how i came to make her acquaintance.

i happened to go to the french play, and to find myself seated next to an extremely pretty lady who was unknown to me. i occasionally addressed an observation to her referring to the play or actors, and i was immensely delighted with her spirited answers. her expression charmed me, and i took the liberty of asking her if she were a russian.

“no, thank god!” she replied, “i am a parisian, and an actress by occupation. my name is valville; but i don’t wonder i am unknown to you, for i have been only a month here, and have played but once.”

“how is that?”

“because i was so unfortunate as to fail to win the czarina’s favour. however, as i was engaged for a year, she has kindly ordered that my salary of a hundred roubles shall be paid monthly. at the end of the year i shall get my passport and go.”

“i am sure the empress thinks she is doing you a favour in paying you for nothing.”

“very likely; but she does not remember that i am forgetting how to act all this time.”

“you ought to tell her that.”

“i only wish she would give me an audience.”

“that is unnecessary. of course, you have a lover.”

“no, i haven’t.”

“it’s incredible to me!”

“they say the incredible often happens.”

“i am very glad to hear it myself.”

i took her address, and sent her the following note the next day:

“madam — i should like to begin an intrigue with you. you have inspired me with feelings that will make me unhappy unless you reciprocate them. i beg to take the liberty of asking myself to sup with you, but please tell me how much it will cost me. i am obliged to leave for warsaw in the course of a month, and i shall be happy to offer you a place in my travelling carriage. i shall be able to get you a passport. the bearer of this has orders to wait, and i hope your answer will be as plainly worded as my question.”

in two hours i received this reply:

“sir — as i have the knack of putting an end to an intrigue when it has ceased to amuse me, i have no hesitation in accepting your proposal. as to the sentiments with which you say i have inspired you, i will do my best to share them, and to make you happy. your supper shall be ready, and later on we will settle the price of the dessert. i shall be delighted to accept the place in your carriage if you can obtain my expenses to paris as well as my passport. and finally, i hope you will find my plain speaking on a match with yours. good bye, till the evening.”

i found my new friend in a comfortable lodging, and we accosted each other as if we had been old acquaintances.

“i shall be delighted to travel with you,” said she, “but i don’t think you will be able to get my passport.”

“i have no doubt as to my success,” i replied, “if you will present to the empress the petition i shall draft for you.”

“i will surely do so,” said she, giving me writing materials.

i wrote out the following petition —

“your majesty — i venture to remind your highness that my enforced idleness is making me forget my art, which i have not yet learnt thoroughly. your majesty’s generosity is therefore doing me an injury, and your majesty would do me a great benefit in giving me permission to leave st. petersburg.”

“nothing more than that?”

“not a word.”

“you say nothing about the passport, and nothing about the journey- money. i am not a rich woman.”

“do you only present this petition; and, unless i am very much mistaken, you will have, not only your journey-money, but also your year’s salary.”

“oh, that would be too much!”

“not at all. you do not know catherine, but i do. have this copied, and present it in person.”

“i will copy it out myself, for i can write a good enough hand. indeed, it almost seems as if i had composed it; it is exactly my style. i believe you are a better actor than i am, and from this evening i shall call myself your pupil. come, let us have some supper, that you may give me my first lesson.”

after a delicate supper, seasoned by pleasant and witty talk, madame valville granted me all i could desire. i went downstairs for a moment to send away my coachman and to instruct him what he was to say to zaira, whom i had forewarned that i was going to cronstadt, and might not return till the next day. my coachman was a ukrainian on whose fidelity i could rely, but i knew that it would be necessary for me to be off with the old love before i was on with the new.

madame valville was like most young frenchwomen of her class; she had charms which she wished to turn to account, and a passable education; her ambition was to be kept by one man, and the title of mistress was more pleasing in her ears than that of wife.

in the intervals of four amorous combats she told me enough of her life for me to divine what it had been. clerval, the actor, had been gathering together a company of actors at paris, and making her acquaintance by chance and finding her to be intelligent, he assured her that she was a born actress, though she had never suspected it. the idea had dazzled her, and she had signed the agreement. she started from paris with six other actors and actresses, of whom she was the only one that had never played.

“i thought,” she said, “it was like what is done at paris, where a girl goes into the chorus or the ballet without having learnt to sing or dance. what else could i think, after an actor like clerval had assured me i had a talent for acting and had offered me a good engagement? all he required of me was that i should learn by heart and repeat certain passages which i rehearsed in his presence. he said i made a capital soubrette, and he certainly could not have been trying to deceive me, but the fact is he was deceived himself. a fortnight after my arrival i made my first appearance, and my reception was not a flattering one.”

“perhaps you were nervous?”

“nervous? not in the least. clerval said that if i could have put on the appearance of nervousness the empress, who is kindness itself, would certainly have encouraged me.”

i left her the next morning after i had seen her copy out the petition. she wrote a very good hand.

“i shall present it to-day,” said she.

i wished her good luck, and arranged to sup with her again on the day i meant to part with zaira.

all french girls who sacrifice to venus are in the same style as the valville; they are entirely without passion or love, but they are pleasant and caressing. they have only one object; and that is their own profit. they make and unmake an intrigue with a smiling face and without the slightest difficulty. it is their system, and if it be not absolutely the best it is certainly the most convenient.

when i got home i found zaira submissive but sad, which annoyed me more than anger would have done, for i loved her. however, it was time to bring the matter to an end, and to make up my mind to endure the pain of parting.

rinaldi, the architect, a man of seventy, but still vigorous and sensual, was in love with her, and he had hinted to me several times that he would be only too happy to take her over and to pay double the sum i had given for her. my answer had been that i could only give her to a man she liked, and that i meant to make her a present of the hundred roubles i had given for her. rinaldi did not like this answer, as he had not very strong hopes of the girl taking a fancy to him; however, he did not despair.

he happened to call on me on the very morning on which i had determined to give her up, and as he spoke russian perfectly he gave zaira to understand how much he loved her. her answer was that he must apply to me, as my will was law to her, but that she neither liked nor disliked anyone else. the old man could not obtain any more positive reply and left us with but feeble hopes, but commending himself to my good offices.

when he had gone, i asked zaira whether she would not like me to leave her to the worthy man, who would treat her as his own daughter.

she was just going to reply when i was handed a note from madame valville, asking me to call on her, as she had a piece of news to give me. i ordered the carriage immediately, telling zaira that i should not be long.

“very good,” she replied, “i will give you a plain answer when you come back.”

i found madame valville in a high state of delight.

“long live the petition!” she exclaimed, as soon as she saw me. “i waited for the empress to come out of her private chapel. i respectfully presented my petition, which she read as she walked along, and then told me with a kindly smile to wait a moment. i waited, and her majesty returned me the petition initialled in her own hand, and bade me take it to m. ghelagin. this gentleman gave me an excellent reception, and told me that the sovereign hand ordered him to give me my passport, my salary for a year, and a hundred ducats for the journey. the money will be forwarded in a fortnight, as my name will have to be sent to the gazette.”

madame valville was very grateful, and we fixed the day of our departure. three or four days later i sent in my name to the gazette.

i had promised zaira to come back, so telling my new love that i would come and live with her as soon as i had placed the young russian in good hands, i went home, feeling rather curious to hear zaira’s determination.

after zaira had supped with me in perfect good humour, she asked if m. rinaldi would pay me back the money i had given far her. i said he would, and she went on —

“it seems to me that i am worth more than i was, for i have all your presents, and i know italian.”

“you are right, dear, but i don’t want it to be said that i have made a profit on you; besides, i intend to make you a present of the hundred roubles.”

“as you are going to make me such a handsome present, why not send me back to my father’s house? that would be still more generous. if m. rinaldi really loves me, he can come and talk it over with my father. you have no objection to his paying me whatever sum i like to mention.”

“not at all. on the contrary, i shall be very glad to serve your family, and all the more as rinaldi is a rich man.”

“very good; you will be always dear to me in my memory. you shall take me to my home to-morrow; and now let us go to bed.”

thus it was that i parted with this charming girl, who made me live soberly all the time i was at st. petersburg. zinowieff told me that if i had liked to deposit a small sum as security i could have taken her with me; but i had thought the matter over, and it seemed to me that as zaira grew more beautiful and charming i should end by becoming a perfect slave to her. possibly, however, i should not have looked into matters so closely if i had not been in love with madame valville.

zaira spent the next morning in gathering together her belongings, now laughing and now weeping, and every time that she left her packing to give me a kiss i could not resist weeping myself. when i restored her to her father, the whole family fell on their knees around me. alas for poor human nature! thus it is degraded by the iron heel of oppression. zaira looked oddly in the humble cottage, where one large mattress served for the entire family.

rinaldi took everything in good part. he told me that since the daughter would make no objection he had no fear of the father doing so. he went to the house the next day, but he did not get the girl till i had left st. petersburg. he kept her for the remainder of his days, and behaved very handsomely to her.

after this melancholy separation madame valville became my sole mistress, and we left the russian capital in the course of a few weeks. i took an armenian merchant into my service; he had lent me a hundred ducats, and cooked very well in the eastern style. i had a letter from the polish resident to prince augustus sulkowski, and another from the english ambassador for prince adam czartoryski.

the day after we left st. petersburg we stopped at koporie to dine; we had taken with us some choice viands and excellent wines. two days later we met the famous chapel-master, galuppi or buranelli, who was on his way to st. petersburg with two friends and an artiste. he did not know me, and was astonished to find a venetian dinner awaiting him at the inn, as also to hear a greeting in his mother tongue. as soon as i had pronounced my name he embraced me with exclamations of surprise and joy.

the roads were heavy with rain, so we were a week in getting to riga, and when we arrived i was sorry to hear that prince charles was not there. from riga, we were four days before getting to konigsberg, where madame valville, who was expected at berlin, had to leave me. i left her my armenian, to whom she gladly paid the hundred ducats i owed him. i saw her again two years later, and shall speak of the meeting in due time.

we separated like good friends, without any sadness. we spent the night at klein roop, near riga, and she offered to give me her diamonds, her jewels, and all that she possessed. we were staying with the countess lowenwald, to whom i had a letter from the princess dolgorouki. this lady had in her house, in the capacity of governess, the pretty english woman whom i had known as campioni’s wife. she told me that her husband was at warsaw, and that he was living with villiers. she gave me a letter for him, and i promised to make him send her some money, and i kept my word. little betty was as charming as ever, but her mother seemed quite jealous of her and treated her ill.

when i reached konigsberg i sold my travelling carriage and took a place in a coach for warsaw. we were four in all, and my companions only spoke german and polish, so that i had a dreadfully tedious journey. at warsaw i went to live with villiers, where i hoped to meet campioni.

it was not long before i saw him, and found him well in health and in comfortable quarters. he kept a dancing school, and had a good many pupils. he was delighted to have news of fanny and his children. he sent them some money, but had no thoughts of having them at warsaw, as fanny wished. he assured me she was not his wife.

he told me that tomatis, the manager of the comic opera, had made a fortune, and had in his company a milanese dancer named catai, who enchanted all the town by her charms rather than her talent. games of chance were permitted, but he warned me that warsaw was full of card-sharpers. a veronese named giropoldi, who lived with an officer from lorrain called bachelier, held a bank at faro at her house, where a dancer, who had been the mistress of the famous afflisio at vienna, brought customers.

major sadir, whom i have mentioned before, kept another gaming-house, in company with his mistress, who came from saxony. the baron de st. heleine was also in warsaw, but his principal occupation was to contract debts which he did not mean to pay. he also lived in villier’s house with his pretty and virtuous young wife, who would have nothing to say to us. campioni told me of some other adventurers, whose names i was very glad to know that i might the better avoid them.

the day after my arrival i hired a man and a carriage, the latter being an absolute necessity at warsaw, where in my time, at all events, it was impossible to go on foot. i reached the capital of poland at the end of october, 1765.

my first call was on prince adam czartoryski, lieutenant of podolia, for whom i had an introduction. i found him before a table covered with papers, surrounded by forty or fifty persons, in an immense library which he had made into his bedroom. he was married to a very pretty woman, but had not yet had a child by her because she was too thin for his taste.

he read the long letter i gave him, and said in elegant french that he had a very high opinion of the writer of the letter; but that as he was very busy just then he hoped i would come to supper with him if i had nothing better to do.

i drove off to prince sulkouski, who had just been appointed ambassador to the court of louis xv. the prince was the elder of four brothers and a man of great understanding, but a theorist in the style of the abbe st. pierre. he read the letter, and said he wanted to have a long talk with me; but that being obliged to go out he would be obliged if i would come and dine with him at four o’clock. i accepted the invitation.

i then went to a merchant named schempinski, who was to pay me fifty ducats a month on papanelopulo’s order. my man told me that there was a public rehearsal of a new opera at the theatre, and i accordingly spent three hours there, knowing none and unknown to all. all the actresses were pretty, but especially the catai, who did not know the first elements of dancing. she was greatly applauded, above all by prince repnin, the russian ambassador, who seemed a person of the greatest consequence.

prince sulkouski kept me at table for four mortal hours, talking on every subject except those with which i happened to be acquainted. his strong points were politics and commerce, and as he found my mind a mere void on these subjects, he shone all the more, and took quite a fancy to me, as i believe, because he found me such a capital listener.

about nine o’clock, having nothing better to do (a favourite phrase with the polish noblemen), i went to prince adam, who after pronouncing my name introduced me to the company. there were present monseigneur krasinski, the prince-bishop of warmia, the chief prothonotary rzewuski, whom i had known at st. petersburg, the palatin oginski, general roniker, and two others whose barbarous names i have forgotten. the last person to whom he introduced me was his wife, with whom i was very pleased. a few moments after a fine- looking gentleman came into the room, and everybody stood up. prince adam pronounced my name, and turning to me said, coolly —

“that’s the king.”

this method of introducing a stranger to a sovereign prince was assuredly not an overwhelming one, but it was nevertheless a surprise; and i found that an excess of simplicity may be as confusing as the other extreme. at first i thought the prince might be making a fool of me; but i quickly put aside the idea, and stepped forward and was about to kneel, but his majesty gave me his hand to kiss with exquisite grace, and as he was about to address me, prince adam shewed him the letter of the english ambassador, who was well known to the king. the king read it, still standing, and began to ask me questions about the czarina and the court, appearing to take great interest in my replies.

when supper was announced the king continued to talk, and led me into the supper-room, and made me sit down at his right hand. everybody ate heartily except the king, who appeared to have no appetite, and myself, who had no right to have any appetite, even if i had not dined well with prince sulkouski, for i saw the whole table hushed to listen to my replies to the king’s questions.

after supper the king began to comment very graciously on my answers. his majesty spoke simply but with great elegance. as he was leaving he told me he should always be delighted to see me at his court, and prince adam said that if i liked to be introduced to his father, i had only to call at eleven o’clock the next morning.

the king of poland was of a medium height, but well made. his face was not a handsome one, but it was kindly and intelligent. he was rather short-sighted, and his features in repose bore a somewhat melancholy expression; but in speaking, the whole face seemed to light up. all he said was seasoned by a pleasant wit.

i was well enough pleased with this interview, and returned to my inn, where i found campioni seated amongst several guests of either sex, and after staying with them for half an hour i went to bed.

at eleven o’clock the next day i was presented to the great russian paladin. he was in his dressing-gown, surrounded by his gentlemen in the national costume. he was standing up and conversing with his followers in a kindly but grave manner. as soon as his son adam mentioned my name, he unbent and gave me a most kindly yet dignified welcome. his manners were not awful, nor did they inspire one with familiarity, and i thought him likely to be a good judge of character. when i told him that i had only gone to russia to amuse myself and see good company, he immediately concluded that my aims in coming to poland were of the same kind; and he told me that he could introduce me to a large circle. he added that he should be glad to see me to dinner and supper whenever i had no other engagements.

he went behind a screen to complete his toilette, and soon appeared in the uniform of his regiment, with a fair peruke in the style of the late king augustus ii. he made a collective bow to everyone, and went to see his wife, who was recovering from a disease which would have proved fatal if it had not been for the skill of reimann, a pupil of the great boerhaave. the lady came of the now extinct family of enoff, whose immense wealth she brought to her husband. when he married her he abandoned the maltese order, of which he had been a knight. he won his bride by a duel with pistols on horseback. the lady had promised that her hand should be the conqueror’s guerdon, and the prince was so fortunate as to kill his rival. of this marriage there issued prince adam and a daughter, now a widow, and known under the name of lubomirska, but formerly under that of strasnikowa, that being the title of the office her husband held in the royal army.

it was this prince palatine and his brother, the high chancellor of lithuania, who first brought about the polish troubles. the two brothers were discontented with their position at the court where count bruhl was supreme, and put themselves at the head of the plot for dethroning the king, and for placing on the throne, under russian protection, their young nephew, who had originally gone to st. petersburg as an attache at the embassy, and afterwards succeeded in winning the favour of catherine, then grand duchess, but soon to become empress.

this young man was stanislas poniatowski, son of constance czartoryski and the celebrated poniatowski, the friend of charles iii. as luck would have it, a revolution was unnecessary to place him on the throne, for the king died in 1763, and gave place to prince poniatowski, who was chosen king on the 6th of september, 1776, under the title of stanislas augustus i. he had reigned two years at the time of my visit; and i found warsaw in a state of gaiety, for a diet was to be held and everyone wished to know how it was that catherine had given the poles a native king.

at dinner-time i went to the paladin’s and found three tables, at each of which there were places for thirty, and this was the usual number entertained by the prince. the luxury of the court paled before that of the paladin’s house. prince adam said to me,

“chevalier, your place will always be at my father’s table.”

this was a great honour, and i felt it. the prince introduced me to his handsome sister, and to several palatins and starosts. i did not fail to call on all these great personages, so in the course of a fortnight i found myself a welcome guest in all the best houses.

my purse was too lean to allow of my playing or consoling myself with a theatrical beauty, so i fell back on the library of monseigneur zalewski, the bishop of kiowia, for whom i had taken a great liking. i spent almost all my mornings with him, and it was from this prelate that i learnt all the intrigues and complots by which the ancient polish constitution, of which the bishop was a great admirer, had been overturned. unhappily, his firmness was of no avail, and a few months after i left warsaw the russian tyrants arrested him and he was exiled to siberia.

i lived calmly and peaceably, and still look back upon those days with pleasure. i spent my afternoons with the paladin playing tressette an italian game of which he was very fond, and which i played well enough for the paladin to like to have me as a partner.

in spite of my sobriety and economy i found myself in debt three months after my arrival, and i did not know where to turn for help. the fifty ducats per month, which were sent me from venice, were insufficient, for the money i had to spend on my carriage, my lodging, my servant, and my dress brought me down to the lowest ebb, and i did not care to appeal to anyone. but fortune had a surprise in store for me, and hitherto she had never left me.

madame schmit, whom the king for good reasons of his own had accommodated with apartments in the palace, asked me one evening to sup with her, telling me that the king would be of the party. i accepted the invitation, and i was delighted to find the delightful bishop kraswiski, the abbe guigiotti, and two or three other amateurs of italian literature. the king, whose knowledge of literature was extensive, began to tell anecdotes of classical writers, quoting manuscript authorities which reduced me to silence, and which were possibly invented by him. everyone talked except myself, and as i had had no dinner i ate like an ogre, only replying by monosyllables when politeness obliged me to say something. the conversation turned on horace, and everyone gave his opinion on the great materialist’s philosophy, and the abbe guigiotti obliged me to speak by saying that unless i agreed with him i should not keep silence.

“if you take my silence for consent to your extravagant eulogium of horace,” i said, “you are mistaken; for in my opinion the ‘nec cum venari volet poemata panges’, of which you think so much, is to my mind a satire devoid of delicacy.”

“satire and delicacy are hard to combine.”

“not for horace, who succeeded in pleasing the great augustus, and rendering him immortal as the protector of learned men. indeed other sovereigns seem to vie with him by taking his name and even by disguising it.”

the king (who had taken the name of augustus himself) looked grave and said —

“what sovereigns have adopted a disguised form of the name augustus?”

“the first king of sweden, who called himself gustavus, which is only an anagram of augustus.”

“that is a very amusing idea, and worth more than all the tales we have told. where did you find that?”

“in a manuscript at wolfenbuttel.”

the king laughed loudly, though he himself had been citing manuscripts. but he returned to the charge and said —

“can you cite any passage of horace (not in manuscript) where he shews his talent for delicacy and satire?”

“sir, i could quote several passages, but here is one which seems to me very good: ‘coyam rege’, says the poet, ‘sua de paupertate tacentes, plus quan pocentes ferent.”

“true indeed,” said the king, with a smile.

madame schmit, who did not know latin, and inherited curiosity from her mother, and eventually from eve, asked the bishop what it meant, and he thus translated it:

“they that speak not of their necessities in the presence of a king, gain more than they that are ever asking.”

the lady remarked that she saw nothing satirical in this.

after this it was my turn to be silent again; but the king began to talk about ariosto, and expressed a desire to read it with me. i replied with an inclination of the head, and horace’s words: ‘tempora quoeram’.

next morning, as i was coming out from mass, the generous and unfortunate stanislas augustus gave me his hand to kiss, and at the same time slid a roll of money into my hand, saying —

“thank no one but horace, and don’t tell anyone about it.”

the roll contained two hundred ducats, and i immediately paid off my debts. since then i went almost every morning to the king’s closet, where he was always glad to see his courtiers, but there was no more said about reading ariosto. he knew italian, but not enough to speak it, and still less to appreciate the beauties of the great poet. when i think of this worthy prince, and of the great qualities he possessed as a man, i cannot understand how he came to commit so many errors as a king. perhaps the least of them all was that he allowed himself to survive his country. as he could not find a friend to kill him, i think he should have killed himself. but indeed he had no need to ask a friend to do him this service; he should have imitated the great kosciuszko, and entered into life eternal by the sword of a russian.

the carnival was a brilliant one. all europe seemed to have assembled at warsaw to see the happy being whom fortune had so unexpectedly raised to a throne, but after seeing him all were agreed that, in his case at all events, the deity had been neither blind nor foolish. perhaps, however, he liked shewing himself rather too much. i have detected him in some distress on his being informed that there was such a thing as a stranger in warsaw who had not seen him. no one had any need of an introduction, for his court was, as all courts should be, open to everyone, and when he noticed a strange face he was the first to speak.

here i must set down an event which took place towards the end of january. it was, in fact, a dream; and, as i think i have confessed before, superstition had always some hold on me.

i dreamt i was at a banquet, and one of the guests threw a bottle at my face, that the blood poured forth, that i ran my sword through my enemy’s body, and jumped into a carriage, and rode away.

prince charles of courland came to warsaw, and asked me to dine with him at prince poninski’s, the same that became so notorious, and was afterwards proscribed and shamefully dishonoured. his was a hospitable house, and he was surrounded by his agreeable family. i had never called on him, as he was not a ‘persona grata’ to the king or his relations.

in the course of the dinner a bottle of champagne burst, and a piece of broken glass struck me just below the eye. it cut a vein, and the blood gushed over my face, over my clothes, and even over the cloth. everybody rose, my wound was bound up, the cloth was changed, and the dinner went on merrily. i was surprised at the likeness between my dream and this incident, while i congratulated myself on the happy difference between them. however, it all came true after a few months.

madame binetti, whom i had last seen in london, arrived at warsaw with her husband and pic the dancer. she had a letter of introduction to the king’s brother, who was a general in the austrian service, and then resided at warsaw. i heard that the day they came, when i was at supper at the palatin’s. the king was present, and said he should like to keep them in warsaw for a week and see them dance, if a thousand ducats could do it.

i went to see madame binetti and to give her the good news the next morning. she was very much surprised to meet me in warsaw, and still more so at the news i gave her. she called pic who seemed undecided, but as we were talking it over, prince poniatowski came in to acquaint them with his majesty’s wishes, and the offer was accepted. in three days pic arranged a ballet; the costumes, the scenery, the music, the dancers — all were ready, and tomatis put it on handsomely to please his generous master. the couple gave such satisfaction that they were engaged for a year. the catai was furious, as madame binetti threw her completely into the shade, and, worse still, drew away her lovers. tomatis, who was under the catai’s influence, made things so unpleasant for madame binetti that the two dancers became deadly enemies.

in ten or twelve days madame binetti was settled it a well-furnished house; her plate was simple but good, her cellar full of excellent wine, her cook an artist and her adorers numerous, amongst them being moszciuski and branicki, the king’s friends.

the pit was divided into two parties, for the catai was resolved to make a stand against the new comer, though her talents were not to be compared to madame binetti’s. she danced in the first ballet, and her rival in the second. those who applauded the first greeted that second in dead silence, and vice versa. i had great obligations towards madame binetti, but my duty also drew me towards the catai, who numbered in her party all the czartoryskis and their following, prince lubomirski, and other powerful nobles. it was plain that i could not desert to madame binetti without earning the contempt of the other party.

madame binetti reproached me bitterly, and i laid the case plainly before her. she agreed that i could not do otherwise, but begged me to stay away from the theatre in future, telling me that she had got a rod in pickle for tomatis which would make him repent of his impertinence. she called me her oldest friend; and indeed i was very fond of her, and cared nothing for the catai despite her prettiness.

xavier branicki, the royal postoli, knight of the white eagle, colonel of uhlans, the king’s friend, was the chief adorer of madame binetti. the lady probably confided her displeasure to him, and begged him to take vengeance on the manager, who had committed so many offences against her. count branicki in his turn probably promised to avenge her quarrel, and, if no opportunity of doing so arose, to create an opportunity. at least, this is the way in which affairs of this kind are usually managed, and i can find no better explanation for what happened. nevertheless, the way in which the pole took vengeance was very original and extraordinary.

on the 20th of february branicki went to the opera, and, contrary to his custom, went to the catai’s dressing-room, and began to pay his court to the actress, tomatis being present. both he and the actress concluded that branicki had had a quarrel with her rival, and though she did not much care to place him in the number of her adorers, she yet gave him a good reception, for she knew it would be dangerous to despise his suit openly.

when the catai had completed her toilet, the gallant postoli offered. her his arm to take her to her carriage, which was at the door. tomatis followed, and i too was there, awaiting my carriage. madame catai came down, the carriage-door was opened, she stepped in, and branicki got in after her, telling the astonished tomatis to follow them in the other carriage. tomatis replied that he meant to ride in his own carriage, and begged the colonel to get out. branicki paid no attention, and told the coachman to drive on. tornatis forbade him to stir, and the man, of course, obeyed his master. the gallant postcili was therefore obliged to get down, but he bade his hussar give tomatis a box on the ear, and this order was so promptly and vigorously obeyed that the unfortunate man was on the ground before he had time to recollect that he had a sword. he got up eventually and drove off, but he could eat no supper, no doubt because he had a blow to digest. i was to have supped with him, but after this scene i had really not the face to go. i went home in a melancholy and reflective mood, wondering whether the whole had been concerted; but i concluded that this was impossible, as neither branicki nor binetti could have foreseen the impoliteness and cowardice of tomatis.

in the next chapter the reader will see how tragically the matter ended.

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