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CHAPTER II. WHAT CAME OF IT.

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when laurie left the hydrographic in company with his friend slasher, he had still a hope of being able to present himself for a few moments in the square to report how he had sped. but his companion, as it turned out, had no such idea. the hydrographic held its meetings in the artists’ quarter,—in that region which, but for art, no man of fashion would think of visiting. but being in it, for once in a way, slasher, who considered himself a man of fashion, had made up his mind to make the best of it. he went with laurie to his rooms, talking all the way of suffolk’s pictures. that the critic had been shaken by the sight of them, there could be no doubt. he had been moved by the admiration of so many men who knew better than he did. the mere fact that the painter had been invited to make such an exhibition showed that he was becoming known to his own profession, and had been owned by it. there was light, and space, and leisure to look at the pictures. there was the comfortable sensation,—in slasher’s case,—of a good dinner and pleasant company, and just such an{21} amount of deference to himself as soothed and glorified his self-esteem. he insisted on going with laurie to finish the evening, letting his tongue loose as they walked along. ‘there is something in it, i don’t deny,’ he said. ‘the contrast between that fair group of children and the dark romans is very well done, and the monk’s figure is full of expression. let us see what you have yourself, laurie. i, for one, am more interested in that. welby is such a friend of yours, he might have found a place for something of your own to-night. it is not a bad room for showing a picture,—and all sorts of men go to the hydrographic. it would be as good a thing as you could do to make welby exhibit you there next time he has a chance. yes, i don’t deny there’s a good deal that’s fine about that picture. the light is very well managed. it sets one thinking of rome, you know, and how the air all smiles and glows about you on a spring morning. it’s not a bad picture. is this where you live? it is not so nice as kensington gore.’

‘no,’ said laurie, ‘it’s not so nice; but it’s better for work;’ and he ushered his companion into his room, where the contents of his portfolios, which he had carried off for suffolk’s sketches, lay about, all mingled with books and studies in oil and a great deal of litter. the big canvas, thrust back into a corner, a pale shadow of what might have been, presided over the confusion. it was not so nice as kensington gore; but to slasher, who liked to feel himself a man{22} of fashion and superior to professional persons, the disorder of the place was not disagreeable. laurie renton had once been ‘a cut above him,’ and it was not unpleasant to feel that laurie renton was now in circumstances to appeal to his patronage. they sat down together over the fire, and lighted their cigars; and what with the smoke, and what with the liquids that accompanied it, and the witching hour of night which makes men confidential, and the old associations, slasher’s lips were opened, and he unfolded to laurie many particulars of his life. ‘you would not think it, but i began the world in much such a place as this,’ said the critic. laurie, of course, knew all about the manner in which his companion had begun the world; for everybody does know all about everybody else, especially in respect to those circumstances of which everybody else is the least proud. the listener in this case had the embarrassing privilege of contrasting autobiography with history, which is always a curious process. but, notwithstanding this difficulty, laurie was, as always, a good listener,—not from policy, which seldom deceives any one, but because he preserved that tender politeness of the heart and regard for other people’s feelings which make it impossible for a man to contradict, or doubt, or sneer at his neighbour. ‘i suppose he thinks it all happened so,’ laurie said to himself; and slasher was grateful to him for the good faith,—a little puzzled certainly, but genuine,—with which he listened. in{23} the breaks of his story he would get up and saunter about the room, turning over laurie’s sketches, and now and then he would interject some remark upon the special subject of the evening.

‘some of those studies of your friend’s were fine,’ he said, suddenly. ‘i hope they’ll do him justice next year at the academy. i’ll speak to sir peter, if you like; and if the picture he is doing now is as good as the one we saw to-night——’

‘one bird in the hand is worth two in the bush,’ said laurie, oracularly. ‘and half a loaf is better than no bread.’

‘hang it, what can a fellow do?’ cried slasher. ‘you are the most pertinacious little beggar i ever came across. do you think a man can go and eat his own words and stultify himself? look here, i’ll tell you what i’ll do. you shall write a notice of the hydrographic for the “sword.” blow the fellow’s trumpet up to the skies, if you like; say there’s never been anything like him since titian. and i’ll take it to crowther. now i don’t see what more a man can do.’

‘i write the notice for the “sword!”’ cried laurie, laughing,—‘that is a little too strong. i never put a sentence together in my life.’

‘as if that had anything to do with it!’ said the critic. ‘why that’s the only good thing i can see in this blessed trade of literature. you can go at it off-hand. put a sentence together! why i’ve heard{24} you put twenty. it’s nothing but talking, my dear fellow. a practical writer like myself, you know, goes off at the nail, and talks of fifty other subjects before he touches the right one; but i can fancy that the public, by way of a change, might prefer to hear what you wanted to say at once. of course you can do it; and i’ll take it to crowther. a man cannot make a fairer offer than that.’

‘it is awfully good of you,’ said laurie, in a ferment. the proposal went tingling through his veins like wine. it had seemed supremely ridiculous to him when old welby had suggested that he should take to writing, just as he might have suggested shoe-making or carpentry. but from slasher, to whom the doors of the ‘sword’ were open,—and in suffolk’s interest,—the idea changed its aspect. though there are no labourers of any description who so systematically underrate their trade as do professors of literature, yet it is astonishing how pleased every outsider is who is invited to enter that magic circle. laurie felt that slasher in his turn had paid him the most delicate compliment. though he might have laughed at the ‘sword’ and the critic, and at newspapers and critics in general, at another moment, no sooner was he asked to strike in, in the mêlée, than the craft and all its adjuncts became splendid to laurie. what a power it was! how a word in the ‘sword’ thrilled through and through those regions where artists congregated, filling some with boundless{25} satisfaction and others with despair! when he cried out, in modest delight and surprise, ‘i write a notice for the “sword!”’ thinking it too grand to be true, he already felt himself ever so much more important, so much cleverer and greater a person than he had been five minutes before. perhaps, it is true, the smoke and the beverage that accompanied it, and the fact that it was two o’clock in the morning, had something to do with laurie’s pleasure in the proposal, as it had with mr. slasher’s liberality in making it;—but still there it was. laurie renton, whom everybody had snubbed, down to forrester,—whom everybody had interfered with and advised and ordered about ‘for his good,’—might now become, all at once, an authority before whom they would tremble in their turn,—who would dispense justice, or favour, or vengeance, from his high-placed seat. it was when he looked at it from this point of view, and not out of any disinterested love of literature, that he jumped at the idea. laurie leaned over the fire with his eyes glowing, and revelled in the wonderful thought. he was a little particular about his drawings in most cases, preferring to show them himself, and give what elucidation he saw necessary; but this time he permitted slasher to make his own investigations undisturbed. all he had hoped for in his most sanguine moments had been to extract from the critic some grudging word of praise which should rouse public curiosity about suffolk’s picture. but to have the organ in{26} his own hands, to say what he would,—to secure in his own person that art should be spoken of with understanding, commended without fear or favour, condemned with impartiality,—this was something beyond his highest hopes. such a critic as he himself would be was the thing of all others wanted in the world of art. how often had the painters round him,—how often had he himself,—asked each other if such a thing were possible? and here was the possibility placed within his reach,—thrust, as it were, into his own hands!

suffolk had gone home hours before, calling at the square for his wife. he gave the ladies the very scantiest account of what had happened, but suffered the particulars to be drawn out of him, bit by bit, as he walked home through the dimly-lighted streets. though he was too proud to make any demonstration of satisfaction before mrs. severn, yet his wife read in the eyes, whose expression she knew so well, that for once in his life the sense of general approbation had warmed him. ‘it is all laurie renton’s doing,’ she said, in the candour of delight, with a generosity which was not so easy to her husband. suffolk himself had never made any appeal to laurie, and did not see it in the same light.

‘i don’t think laurie renton has so much in his power,’ he said, ‘though he has taken a great deal of trouble. it was welby’s affair chiefly, of course; and then, after all, a man who has been labouring a{27} dozen years surely does not need to be grateful to anybody if he gets a bit of recognition on his own merits at last.’

‘of course it is on your own merits, reginald,’ said his wife; but the woman was more grateful than the man. she knew very well that it was not her husband’s merits,—which, indeed, had met with but little recognition hitherto,—but that wistful word she had once spoken to laurie, and his soft heart which had not forgotten it. suffolk went on, quite unconscious of her thoughts and of her interference, to set down poor laurie at his just value.

‘renton was there with a friend of his,’ he continued;—‘slasher, helen,—that confounded snob who has the impudence to give us all our deserts in the “sword,”—as shallow an ape as you ever saw. laurie’s a very good fellow, but he’s too general in his friendships. after feeling really obliged to him for his handiness, to see him arm in arm with a conceited ass like that——’

‘did you speak to him?’ cried mrs. suffolk. ‘what did he look like? reginald, of course it is natural that you should be affronted; but if you consider how much influence the “sword” has——’

‘oh, i was civil; don’t be frightened,’ said suffolk. ‘deadly civil we both were; and he had something complimentary to say, like the rest. trust those fellows to see which way the wind’s blowing. but what disgusts one is to find laurie renton,—a{28} fellow one likes,—hand in glove with a snob like that.’

‘he does not mean it, reginald, i am sure,’ said mrs. suffolk, driven to her wits’ end, and feeling at once disposed to assault her husband for his stupidity, and to cry over poor laurie, thus cruelly belied.

‘oh, no, he doesn’t mean it,’ said the painter; ‘it’s only that confounded friendliness of his that likes to please everybody. if he had more stamina and less good nature——’ said his critic, severely.

but he never knew how near his wife was to shaking him as she clung to his arm. and mrs. suffolk said no more on the subject,—reflecting, first, that when a man takes a ridiculous idea into his head, it is of no use reasoning with him; and, secondly, that laurie should never know how little gratitude had attended his efforts. that at least she would take into her own hands. if reginald did not know what his friend had done for him, she at least did. and so did the padrona; and the chances were that their thanks would be more congenial to laurie than any gruff acknowledgments that might be made from another quarter. thus the pair walked on, excited by the faint prospect of better days, through the glimmering, silent streets, when most people were in bed—the husband making his report in snatches, the wife drawing it forth bit after bit, and piecing the fragments together with an art familiar to women. she knew about as well what had passed as he did{29} by the time they reached their own narrow, dingy door. and after one peep at the children, sleeping up on the fourth floor at the top of the house, mrs. suffolk joined her husband in his studio,—where he had gone to smoke his final pipe,—and drew forth further his bits from him, and added her words of assent or advice to the deliberations he fell into, standing with a candle in his hand before his half-finished picture. ‘please god, you shall have your comforts like the rest, if this comes to anything, my good little wife,’ he said at last. ‘oh, reginald, it is for you i wish it most,’ she cried, with tears in her pretty eyes. that gleam of a possible brightening in their lot went to their hearts. ah, hard, happy, chequered life!—so hard to bear while it is present, so sweet to look back upon when it is past!

but everything was hushed and asleep in the house of the suffolks when laurie shook hands with the critic, and stood at his door in the raw, chilly air of the winter morning to see him go. laurie had not been keeping late hours for some time past, and the excitement had roused him out of all inclination for sleep. he went back to his fire and pushed away the impedimenta from his table, and with his nerves all thrilling, and his brain in a feverish commotion, began to write. perhaps the soda-water had affected him slightly too—and the hours of talk, and the novelty of what he had in hand, had undoubtedly affected him. he sat till his fire burned out and his{30} lamp ran down, making his first essay at composition. it seemed to him very easy in his excitement. ‘if this is all they make so much fuss about!’ he said, feeling himself not only capable of the ‘sword,’ but of greater things. the street was beginning to wake to the first sounds of the morning when he threw himself on his bed, chilled and exhausted, yet full of content. surely, after all, this rapid art, which could be caught up without any study, and the effect of which was immediate, was more to the purpose than the labour of months upon one piece of canvas, which might affect nobody, not even the hanging committee. new prospects seemed opening before him also,—prospects more vast and boundless than those which flickered before the eyes of suffolk and his wife. what if this were now that tide in the affairs of men, which it behoved him to take in its flow! he left his sketches lying about,—paper, and chalk, and canvas, all muddled together,—to be dealt with, in the absence of the portfolios, by the maid-of-all work; but he took his little writing-desk, with his new production in it, to his bedroom with him, where it might be in safety; and fell asleep when the milkman was going his rounds, feeling himself, as it were, on the edge of an altogether new career.

his composition, however, did not look so hopeful when he got up a few hours later, and read it over in the calm of noon as he ate his breakfast. miss{31} hadley over the way had seen that his room was vacant all this time, the windows open, and papers fluttering about in the chilly air. she could not understand why he lost so many hours on such a bright morning, or what had become of him. it was nearly one o’clock before he had done dawdling over his tea, reading and re-reading his criticism. after all, it was not quite so easy. he made a great many emendations, and then took to doubting whether they were emendations; and grew querulous over it, and sadly disturbed in his confidence. then he folded it up and put it in his pocket, and, snatching up his hat, rushed down-stairs. ‘he is going to the square,’ miss hadley said, as she saw him dart round the corner; and she stood for a long time at her window pondering whether jane could be right about that matter. ‘she will never be so silly, and he will never be such a fool,’ said the old lady; and sat down again, with her mind quite excited, to watch when he should come back.

the padrona, for her part, was standing at her easel, troubled with many uncomfortable thoughts. she had looked at herself in the glass that morning longer than usual, and had decided that there were a great many lines in her face which she had not thought of noticing. ‘i am getting old,’ the padrona said to herself, and laughed; and then, perhaps, sighed a little. she laughed because she felt as young as ever, and age seemed a joke as it entered{32} her thoughts; and she sighed because—— who can follow those subtle shades of fancy? and then she began to think. laurie renton was but a boy,—not more than four-and-twenty at the outside, she calculated, reckoning as mothers do. ‘harry was beginning to walk when i saw him first, and harry will be eight in march,’ said the padrona; ‘and laurie was but a schoolboy then, not more than seventeen.’ four-and-twenty! he could not be more,—nothing but a boy. and jane hadley is an old fool;—that was the easiest solution of the difficulty. mrs. severn liked laurie, she said frankly to herself. it was pleasant to have him running in and out, with all his difficulties and all his wants. he was such a good fellow,—so frank, so natural, so willing to help everybody, so transparent about his own affairs, so——affectionate. yes, that was the word;—he was affectionate. half banished as it were from his own family, he had linked himself on to hers, and she was pleased it should be so. and as for any folly that might enter any one’s head! ‘these old maids!’ mrs. severn said to herself,—though it was not like her to say it; and thus she tried to dismiss the subject. if he came too often, she might perhaps suggest to him that it would do him a great deal of good to go and study in italy for the winter. ‘and i should miss the boy,’ the padrona said to herself with candour. but in the meantime there was nothing she could say or do. it was{33} simply ridiculous to think of taking any other step. at her age! and such a boy!

she was still working at the picture which mr. welby had commended. it was a commission from her patrons, the riches of richmont, and was to be hung in a spot chosen by herself in the bright country-house, full of light, and air, and flowers, and everything sweet, to which they sometimes invited her. edith’s little ‘wooden sister’ was standing to her at the moment, draped in great folds of white. she was working hard at the folds of the dress, and studying with puzzled anxiety the position of the limbs, which, mr. welby had declared, had no joints in them. and she was anything but grateful to jane hadley for throwing, just at this moment, an additional embarrassment into her mind. it was while she was thus occupied that laurie rushed in breathless with his tale of last night’s proceedings and his paper to read to her. any prudential thoughts that might have entered her mind as to the propriety of keeping him at a distance vanished at the sight of him. it was all so perfectly natural. whom else should he go to, poor fellow, to tell his doings, to communicate all his difficulties and his hopes? mrs. severn blushed to think that she could have allowed herself for one moment to be swayed from her natural course by such absurdity. jane hadley must have lost her senses. should the boy go to old welby and tell him? should he confide in his{34} landlady? who was there that he could come to in his difficulties but herself?

‘i have brought it to read to you,’ said laurie, ‘if you can take the trouble to listen. i am afraid it is dreadful trash. the truth is, i was a little excited about it last night; and now, this morning——’ he was abashed, poor fellow, and explanatory, and very anxious to impress upon her all the excuses there were for its imperfection. somehow, everything had a different aspect in the morning! he went on, playing with the paper; and then, making a dash at it, began to read. it was not very good, to tell the truth. there was an attempt to be funny in it, which was not very successful, and there was an effort after that airy style which so many young writers attempt unsuccessfully; and then there was a rather grand conclusion, full of big words, which laurie had risen into just as he heard the first cry of the milkman, and felt that it was necessary to come to an effective close. the padrona went on painting very steadily at her easel. she had the notion, which women so often entertain, that a young man, with all those advantages which a man has over her own sex, could do anything he chose to do,—and especially laurie, her own protégé; and yet here, it was evident, was something he could not do. the writing in the ‘sword,’ though it was said to be nothing remarkable, was not like laurie’s writing. poor laurie’s narrative, instead of the{35} sober little history it ought to have been, read like a bad joke. he might have been sneering at suffolk for anything the reader could have made out, and patronising him oppressively at the same moment. never woman was in a more uncomfortable position than was mrs. severn standing at her easel. laurie himself was so conscious of its weakness and flatness that he attempted, by dramatic tricks with his voice, to give it effect. ‘good heavens! suffolk will go mad,’ the padrona said to herself; and then there was a word or two about mr. welby. and the author sat breathless, trembling, yet with a smile of complacency on his face, to hear her opinion. poor laurie! whom she had already driven to the utmost bounds of patience in respect to his picture! she shivered as she stopped to arrange the drapery on the little lay figure. certainly, to be laurie’s adviser-in-chief was a post which had its difficulties as well as its pleasures.

‘is that all?’ she said, when an awful pause of a minute in duration warned her that the moment to deliver her judgment had come.

‘all!’ said laurie, flattered by the question, and beginning to take courage. ‘i should have thought you had found it quite long enough.’

‘well, perhaps it is long enough,’ said the trembling critic; ‘but still i think there might be another paragraph. you have not said anything about the german sketches, for instance, which were{36} so clever; and you know, if i am to be a critic, you must let me find fault. there are one or two turns of expression. what is that you say about mr. suffolk having lived out of the world?’

‘“this young artist has little acquaintance with the ways of the world,”’ read laurie. ‘“he loves nature, which is open to high and low. instead of conciliating the critics and picture-dealers, he has satisfied himself with the models on the steps at the trinita di monte. perhaps we ought to warn him that this is not the best way to please the british public.”’

‘mr. suffolk will not like that,’ said the padrona. ‘it looks as if you meant something against his character. it looks like a sort of accusation——’

‘why, it is a joke!’ cried laurie; ‘every one must see that at a glance.’

‘but people are stupid,’ said his critic, taking courage. ‘i think you should change it. and then about mr. welby. don’t you say he has almost given up painting? there is nothing he hates to hear said like that.’

‘“our veteran master in the art,”’ read laurie, ‘“feeling his own strength decay, has called upon a younger brother to fill his place,—a substitution at which artists will rejoice.” i mean, of course, that everybody will be pleased to find he is spared the trouble.’

‘but he will not like it,’ said the padrona. ‘i{37} think i would say, instead of that about the trinita di monte, that he has spent a great deal of his time in rome, and has caught the warmth of the atmosphere and brilliancy of the colour, and so on; and mr. welby,—i would say how graceful it was on his part to lend his aid to a younger man, and how ready he is to appreciate excellence. you told me to say what i think. and don’t you think if you were to begin just plainly by saying mr. suffolk’s works were exhibited at the hydrographic, instead of that about the gem that is born to blush unseen——?’

‘in short,’ said laurie, with a flush on his face, ‘you don’t like any part of it,—beginning, or middle, or end.’

‘yes, indeed i do,’ said the treacherous woman. ‘i think it is very nice; but i am sure you could improve it. don’t be offended. you could not expect to turn out a thackeray all at once.’

‘nor a michael angelo,’ said laurie, desponding; ‘nor anything. i shall always be a poor pretender, good for little;—and this attempt is more ridiculous than all the rest. well, never mind. if it were not for poor suffolk’s sake——’

‘for suffolk’s sake you are bound to do it,—and do it well,’ said mrs. severn; ‘and for mine,—i mean for everybody’s who cares for you. to begin at three o’clock in the morning, after a night of talk and smoke, and then to be melancholy because you{38} are not pleased with your work! there are pens and paper on that table, laurie, and i will not so much as look at you. go and try again.’

‘do you mean to say you care?’ said laurie; and he went and stood by her, while she continued to work.

he thought it was a little hard that she never turned, never looked at him, but went on painting faster than usual, making false lines in her haste. he had no thought that she was afraid of him, and of any foolish word or look which might change their position to each other. he stood wistfully with his heart full of unspeakable things, yearning for he knew not what, longing for a little more of her, if it were but a glance from her eye, a touch of her hand. she had wounded and mortified him, and then she had bidden him try again; but would not spare him a glance to show that she cared,—would not stop painting, and going wrong. he stood and looked on, watching her in a kind of fascination. she had been hard upon him, and he had felt the sting, and forgiven her; and now he might make reprisals if he would. he put out his hand suddenly and took the brush from her hand. ‘i am not going to be trodden on for ever,’ he said; ‘i am the worm that turns at last. i am going to put in that elbow; you are doing it all wrong.’

the padrona never said a word. she gave the{39} brush up to him, and stood looking on while he carried out his threat,—looking at the canvas, not at him. he did it, and then his heart failed him. he had not an idea how much alarmed she was, and terrified for the next word. he had not made any investigations like miss hadley’s into the state of his own feelings. he did not want anything,—except to be near her, to have her attention, her sympathy, and do whatever she wanted. now he became alarmed, in his turn, at his own boldness, and humbly laid the brush out of his rash hand.

‘padrona mia, i am a wretch, and you are angry with me!’ he said. then mrs. severn laughed, and broke the spell.

‘we are quits,’ she cried, with a nervousness in her voice which laurie could not account for. ‘you have given me the upper hand of you, laurie. now go and sit down yonder, and write your paper all over again from the beginning. i accept your elbow. you are bound to do what i tell you now.’

‘as if i did not always do what you tell me!’ said laurie, and he went and sat down at the writing-table, eager to please her. as for the padrona, she took up her brush with a little shudder, feeling she had escaped for this time, but that it might not be safe to trust to chance again. the foolish boy! and yet with all his folly there was so much to like in him! perhaps even the folly itself was not so{40} despicable in mrs. severn’s eyes as it was in those of jane hadley, who had never been fluttered by alarms of this description, the good soul! but this sort of thing, it was clear, must not be allowed to happen again.

the paper, however, was written, and much improved, and at last, toned down by repeated corrections, was declared ready for the ‘sword,’ and worthy of that illustrious journal. by that time it was dusk, and there was no choice but to let him stay to tea. the padrona sent her attendant from her to listen to something new alice was playing, with a genuine horror of jane hadley’s comments, and annoyed consciousness of which she could not divest herself. but the young man stayed only ten minutes by alice, fair though the child was, and sweet as was her music in the soft wintry gloaming, and came straying back again to the little group on the hearth-rug, to share frank’s foot-stool. ‘he says he is to go to the pantomime, mamma,’ said frank, whose whole being was pervaded by the sense that christmas was coming. ‘and i say he is to go to the pantomime. mamma, i love laurie,’ said little edith. ‘but my pet, i am not laurie’s mamma to take him to the pantomime,’ cried the padrona loud, so that miss hadley could hear. alas! miss hadley did not take the trouble to listen. she looked, and saw laurie half on the stool, half-kneel{41}ing, with the fire-light shining on his face, and that turned upwards to mrs. severn who sat back in the shadow, with an expression, as the governess thought, which nobody could mistake. was it the padrona’s fault?

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